Hotel California
by AlwaysElisabethian
Summary: AU/AH! Caroline has had enough of Elena's love for Damon. That's why she makes an ultimatum. Do something about it, or get over him. And she's determined to get her two best friends together. Delena as always! Coverphoto by Foreverfirstloves
1. Chapter 1

**Hotel California**

**Chapter 1: Elena**

"God, Elena, this is getting ridiculous! You know what, this is the end of it. If you don't do something, to make him see you, to make him see your feelings, you will either move on, or I will do something!"

I sighed, and looked at my best girlfriend. This wasn't the first time we had talked about this. No where near the first time, actually.

This had been a normal topic of our private conversations the past four years. And it was starting to bug me. Why did she keep believing anything would ever change? It hadn't changed the past fifteen years. Why should it now?

And it wasn't the first time she told me to do something about it, either. She knew I was never going to agree to do something. I'd rather sit back, and let life go it's own way.

As an answer to her statement, I shrugged and let my hoodie cover even more of my face. I was wearing one of my favorites. It was big and I was able to hide in it.

"It can't go on like this. We're here because you're turning twenty, and the only thing you're doing, is looking at him from a safe distance. And you're not even dressed up! How is he even supposed to see it's you, if you keep wearing those hoodies and the sunglasses?"

Caroline looked like she was about to explode from frustration. And she probably was. I rolled my eyes and took off my sunglasses. She already knew I was looking at him.

He was sitting at the bar, still wearing his leather jacket. His dark jeans and boots made him look like a bad boy, and of course his stunningly blue eyes looked flirty. He wasn't alone. As always, he was talking to a girl.

"He's used to me dressing like this. He knows this is my style..." I said, and looked down at my hands, that were currently playing with my sunglasses. No need to torture my self more than necessary. Before I could react, Caroline grabbed the glasses and put them in her bag.

"Hey! Give 'em back!" I said and reached for my sunglasses. Not that it was particularly light inside The Grill. I just felt naked without them. Sunglasses had been a part of my daily outfit for the past seven years.

"Nope. Not unless you make me a deal. Because I have the perfect idea to bring you and loverboy together," she said, a big smile on her lips. I frowned and cocked my head. Caroline had an idea to play matchmaker? That never ended up well.

She had been trying to set up several times, ever since we were 15. But it had never turned out successful. That could be because I had always been in love with someone else. But that someone else, would never ever return my feelings. Never.

"Come on, Caroline. Like he would ever like me. I'll just ruin our friendship," I said and looked up at the bar once again.

He was sitting with his usual glass of bourbon in his hand and was talking to a blonde girl. God, if he brought another one home...

"Yes, he would. That's why I have the perfect plan. Now, we're going shopping tomorrow, and then you're going to tell him, that he's coming with us to California!"

I felt my eyes grow wide, as she told me about her 'perfect plan'. There was absolutely nothing perfect about that! I had always wanted to go to California, sure. But with _him? _No, that would make everything too difficult.

"That is never going to work! How on earth did you come up with that plan?!" I said, chocked that she could even think about something like that.

"It's perfect! And if you don't agree, then your other choice would be to move on, and never know what could have been!" she said, obviously happy that she came up with that idea. I sighed, and looked at him again. He had moved closer to the blonde one, and his arm was smoothly wrapped around her waist.

I felt the familiar pain in my chest, at the sight of him with someone else. Maybe Caroline's plan wasn't all bad, after all. Maybe I would get to be the one his arms were wrapped around!

It was a silly dream, but suddenly, it didn't seem so far away. What damage could it do? If we didn't get together, we'd be on holiday together, enjoying California!

"Okay," I said, determined to make Damon come with us to California. He knew I'd always wanted to go there, and we'd been traveling together lots of times. This would just be another place to visit. And Caroline would be there.

"Great! You're going to ask him tomorrow, and when he says yes, we're going shopping!" she said, clearly excited that I'd agreed to her plan. God, what on earth had I gotten my self into?

"Hello, birthday girl!" His arm wrapped around my shoulders, as he sat down next to me and pulled me closer. In the shade of my hood, I blushed as I got close to him. He smelled nice. Like alcohol, leather and male perfume.

"Hey Damon," I said and quickly got out of his tight embrace. Even though I really enjoyed being in his arms, I couldn't handle it. It hurt too much, knowing I wasn't more than a friend. A little sister. Nothing more than that.

His hand went to my head, and he pulled my hood down. I raised my eyebrows at him, and started to pull it up again, but he grabbed my wrist.

"Not today, Lena. Please, lose the hood today. It's your birthday, and you're a bit too sober!" It was by then I noticed the tray on the table, holding at least 20 shots. He didn't expect me to do the 20 shots, did he?

"And you're turning 20! You know the rules! Start doing those shots," he said! I looked at my best friend. His eyes were shining, but his pupils were dilated. He clearly wasn't sober. But how could I deny those blues eyes? No way I could.

I sighed and grabbed one.

"Do you want to help me?" I asked, smiling innocently at Damon. He laughed and shook his head.

"No way, Lena. I did this when I turned 20. Come on, you know I'll take care of you when you're drunk. I promise. I'll make sure you don't do something stupid," he said. I sighed. He knew exactly how to make me do, exactly as he wanted to.

"She'll do it, if you promise one thing!" Caroline said, before I did the first shot. I frowned and looked at her. Why did she use me, to make a deal with him?

Oh my God, this was about the trip to California! She was going to use my drunkenness as a reward for him.

"And what would that be, Barbie?" Damon asked, raising an eyebrow.

There had always been a terrible tension between Caroline and Damon. They had been sleeping together shortly when we were in freshman year. It had been the worst time of my life.

But he had seemed happy with her, until he dumped her, because he got bored. Typical Damon. And now she decided to ask him? She knew I was going to ask.

Or maybe she didn't.

Maybe she didn't believe I wanted him to go with us. That could be why she asked him. To make sure I didn't back out.

I felt my cheeks growing red, as Caroline started talking.

"If she do the 20 shots, you're going with us to California, this Friday. You know, cozy holiday! You know Elena has always wanted to go to California," Caroline said, putting on her business mask. That woman was going to be a salesmen, that's for sure.

"To California? Well, why would I reject that? Of course I'll go. It'll be fun. I like traveling with Elena," he said and nodded at the shot, encouraging me to drink.

Knowing that I had to do it, I let the burning liquid slide down my throat. God, it tasted awful. It had to be tequila.

"Great, then that's settled. We're leaving this Friday, at 10 in the morning! That means 9.30 in the airport, Damon!" Caroline said, knowing that Damon had a habit of being late. He laughed and handed me another shot. As I downed it, I realised that there was something Caroline wasn't telling me. Something she didn't want Damon to know.

"That's early... Fine, I'll go. Now, Elena, you need to get drunk!"

There was no way of not getting drunk. The 20 shots went down, and then I headed for the dance floor with Caroline. She got us another drink, and then we danced together, as if we were lesbians. Somehow, that attracted incredibly many boys. That was a turn on?  
"Hello sexy." I felt a male body behind mine, and a pair of arms around my stomach. I looked down at the hands, and didn't recognise them. They were big, too big to be Damon's. And I didn't want anyone else than Damon to touch me.

As soon as I thought about him, he appeared in front of me, looking at the guy with fury in his eyes. But when he talked, his voice was calm.

"I'm just gonna cut in here," he said, and removed the guys arms from my waist. As soon as he'd done that, I wrapped my arms around his neck and started dancing with me. He laughed and wrapped his arms around my waist, as he started almost carrying me to the booths again.

I was beyond drunk, and all I wanted to do, was to cuddle with Damon. That's why I sat in his lap, and slung my arms around his neck, while leaning my head towards his chest.

"Damon, you know how much I love you, right?" I murmured, being extremely drunk. I had told him I loved him many times, but he'd always thought I meant as a friend. And he would keep on believing that.

"Yes, Lena, I know. Now, I think you're ready to go home. Am I right?" he said, wrapping one arm around my back and the other started to stroke my hair. I smiled at him and kissed his cheek.

"You're so good to me. You always take care of me," I said and looked into his wonderful blue eyes. He looked amused. His other arm wrapped around my legs, and he stood up, started walking towards the exit.

"And I will always be here to take care of you. You're a bit too drunk to drive. I'll take you," he said, and sat me down on the ground, so that he could open the front door. Then he lifted me inside, and placed me on the seat, carefully putting on my seat belt.

Then he got in the drivers seat, and I drifted off to sleep, while he drove home.


	2. Chapter 2

So, if you hadn't figured out, it shifts from Elena's p.o.v to Damon's, each chapter. This should be a bit longer than the previous!

**Chapter 2: Damon**

Elena's party was fun. I did have a lot of fun. I had gotten there early, arriving with the birthday girl and her friend, Caroline. At first, we'd been sitting at the bar, Caroline and I drinking beer, and she soda. Guess she didn't want to be too drunk.

"So, the big twenty! Feel old yet?" I asked and smiled at Elena. I couldn't believe how grown up she was becoming. I had known her since she was 2.

It wasn't easy to see, though. She always hid in those big sweatshirts, and never took off her sunglasses. If I didn't know better, I would think she was using.

"Nope. That's one of the things I have you for. You make me feel young," she said, teasingly pushing me. I lifted one eyebrow and smiled at her.

"Are you implying that I'm old?" I said, also raising the other eyebrow. A teasing smile spread on her lips, as she nodded.

"But I'm not. I'm only 24, and I am still drop dead gorgeous!" I said, downing the rest of my beer, before ordering a new.

"And your ego is bigger than ever!" she said, laughing, as she took her sunglasses off. Finally. It felt kind of weird, talking to her, when I couldn't see her eyes. I loved when she took them off. But she rarely did, when other people were there.

She did at home. She never ever wore them at home. And I loved seeing her without them. But she still insisted on wearing big baggy clothes, that didn't fit her tiny body one bit. It was her choice, but I didn't like it. Not at all.

"You like it," I answered, smirking flirtatious. She knew that I liked flirting, but she also knew that I wasn't being serious with her. I was, when I flirted with other girls, but not with Elena.

Usually she just shrugged it off, and then we would continue the conversation, just where we left it. We knew exactly how to act around each other, and I loved it.

"So, what are you going to do, now that you're 20 years old?" Caroline said, desperate to be a part of the conversation. I had almost forgot about Barbie.

I had always been calling Caroline Barbie or Blondie. I couldn't help it. My sarcastic nature just wanted it to happen.

"There's nothing different from being 19. Except that I feel old. I'm not a teenager any more. And I feel like I never did do anything... Teenage-ish, when I actually was a teenager. No bad-boy boyfriend, no drugs, no cigarettes, only a little bit of alcohol. I feel like someone very innocent, and someone really not capable of living life," she said. I frowned. Sure, she'd been acting completely innocent her whole life, but that wasn't a negative thing? It was a great thing. She had never had a boyfriend, which meant that there was no one for me to threaten or beat up, because they hadn't treated her well.

There had been a couple of people whom I'd been threatening for treating her bad. Like that asshole Tyler Lockwood. He was a bully, and he didn't really seem to be able to leave Elena alone. But I taught him what would happen, if he kept on bullying her. He hadn't talked to her again.

"Maybe that's because there's been someone too importa..." Elena immediately hit Caroline in the stomach, her cheeks going red. What, was she in love?

I chose to ignore the weird girls. That was her choice, not mine. I could ask her about it later. She always told me everything.

"You're not old, Elena. You said that yourself, just look at me! And what's wrong with being innocent? Okay, I'd preferred to see you a bit more drunk sometimes. You make me seem bad and irresponsible. But that's alright. Now, Elena, you need to enjoy this party!" I said and ordered a beer for her. She shook her head and accepted the beer.

"Fine..."

It didn't take long for people to start arriving. As soon as the music was turned up, and people started drinking, Elena put on her sunglasses and sat down in one of the booths, with Caroline. Something told me she wasn't in the mood for party right now. I'd talk to her about it later.

"Hey, Damon! Long time, no see!" I turned around, but didn't see anything else than blonde hair, when I felt someone female hugging me. Big boobs, it seemed like, small waist. Who on earth was that?

She let go again, and let me see her face. Blonde hair, brown eyes, brown brows... Hmm, did I know her? I must have. Did I have sex with her once?

I had no idea who she was, but I had to pretend like I did. Anything else would be rude.

"Hey, uhm... Nice to see you!" I said and downed the rest of my bourbon. Oh well, if I hadn't had sex with her, I was going to. Elena and I were both on holidays from our college, and I needed to get drunk!

All of the summer was right in front of us, just waiting for us to use it. Something told me, that this night was going to be spend with this blonde girl, that obviously knew me, and seemed very interested in me.

I put my arm around her waist, as she leaned her mouth to my ears, and started whispering with a very seductive voice.

"So, you want to get away from this lame party, and go home and have fun? We're a bit too mature for some random _kid's _birthday, don't you think?"

If it had been any other girl's birthday, I had been on my way home with her, to have sex all night. But this wasn't just any girl. This was Elena, and I wasn't going to leave her.

"You know what, I think I'm gonna stay. This _kid _is pretty important to me." I left her staring, as I walked to Elena's table. I wasn't interested in going home with someone talking so rudely about Elena. No way.

On my way, I walked to the other end of the bar, and asked for 20 shots for the birthday girl. She seemed like she was brooding, and I wasn't going to allow that. She was going to get drunk tonight. She had to.

I walked back to their table, with a big smile on my lips. I looked forward to Elena getting drunk. She had resisted a lot at her 18th birthday, but it wouldn't be the same now. This time, I was not going to accept a no. She would have to get drunk. I put the tray on the table, when I finally reached it. Then I put my arm around her shoulder's and pulled her closer.

"Hello, birthday girl!" I said as I sat down. She looked down at the table, once again hiding under her hood. She wouldn't even let me see her face.

"Hey Damon," she answered and shrugged my arm off. Okay, if she didn't want my arm there. On my way away from her shoulders, I reached for her hood and pulled it down. When she looked at me, I smiled, until her hand went to pick it up again. I grabbed her wrist, raising a single eyebrow. It would be a cold day in hell, when I let her put that on again. Not on my watch.

"Not today, Lena. Please, lose the hood today. It's your birthday and you're a bit too sober!" I said and nodded towards the tray. She looked at it, as if she had only noticed it now, and raised an eyebrow at me. Oh God, she was already starting to resist.

"And you're turning 20! You know the rules! Start doing those shots," I said. It was the only thing I could come up with. I didn't want her to protest this. She just needed to relax and let her self have some fun. Just for once in her life.

When she sighed, I knew I had won. She reached out and grabbed one, not looking like someone who was looking forward to getting drunk.

"Do you want to help me?" she asked, an innocent smile playing on her lips. I felt my body reacting a bit to her. What? Reacting to Elena? Noway, she was my best friend. Nothing more. I laughed at her comment and shook my head to answer her question.

"No way, Lena! I did this when I turned 20. Come on, you know I'll take care of you, when you're drunk. I promise. I'll make sure you don't do something stupid," I said, trying to convince her that this was the best thing. I did mean it. I was going to look after her. And she knew that I would look after her and that I would take care of her.

"She'll do it, if you promise one thing!" Caroline said, just when she was about to do the first shot. Both Elena and I frowned and looked at Caroline, equally confused. Great to see it wasn't just me. But then Elena's face turned to utter surprise. She did know what this was about, and she didn't want him to know. Interesting.

"And what would that be, Barbie?" I asked, with one eyebrow raised. Caroline was used to blackmailing people. But only her friends, and only with small things. Never anything serious. No, she was a great person. She just liked getting things her way.

"If she do the 20 shots, you're going with us to California, this Friday. You know, cozy holiday! You know Elena has always wanted to go to California."

I looked at Elena. She was blushing. They had been talking about this? But why on earth was she blushing?

I knew that she blushed often, but this seemed crazy. A trip to California? That didn't sound too bad. But there had to be a downside. There always was.

"TO California? Well, why would I reject that? Of course I'll go. It'll be fun. I like traveling with Elena," I said, and then nodded towards Elena's drink. I had promised, and now she needed to get drunk! She let out a small sigh, and then downed the shot. Her face told me it was tequila. She hated that.

"Great, then that's settled! We're leaving this Friday, at 10 in the morning! That means 9.30 in the airport, Damon!" I laughed as Caroline raised both her eyebrows at me. Then I handed Elena another shot.

"That's early... Fine, I'll go. Now, Elena, you need to get drunk!"

And she did. She got very drunk. The shots affected her immediately, and soon her and Blondie were on the dance floor, dancing as though they had been a couple for several years. Elena moved her body in a way that I had never seen before. She seemed like she was confident, like she had all the experience in this world.

Not like she was a 20 year old girl that hadn't even gotten her first kiss.

I felt my self getting hard, and that was when I looked away from the dancing girls. She was my best friend, I couldn't think of her like that! Noway!  
But I couldn't look away from her for a very long time. My gaze went right back to her, and the first thing I noticed, was that Caroline had disappeared, and a guy was now dancing behind her, locking his arms around her stomach. I felt the anger built up inside of me, as I watched him lower his mouth to her neck, almost placing a kiss on it. No, he wasn't going to do that.

Quickly, I got up and walked to them. When I reached them, I tried to stay as calm as possible. I wanted to rip the guys head off, but I had to act nice. Elena was here.

"I'm just gonna cut in here," I said and removed the guys arms, trying my best not to rip them off his torso. Elena didn't notice much. She just put her arms around my neck, and laughed as she starting dancing again, encouraging me to join her.

I laughed and put my arms around her waist. God, she was drunk. I lifted her, and slowly started walking towards the booth. She needed to sit down, and drink some water. No need for more alcohol.

But as soon as we sat down, she moved to my lap, and wrapped her arms even tighter around my neck. Then she leaned her head into my chest and closed her eyes. What was she doing?

"Damon, you know how much I love you, right?" My heart skipped a beat. Then I remembered she was my best friend, and she told me that all the time. It shouldn't be something special. After all, I did love her too.

"Yes, Lena, I know. Now, I think you're ready to go home. Am I right?" I said, trying to be in control. My arm was around her back, keeping her from falling, and with the other one, I started stroking her hair carefully. I knew she loved when I did that. And I loved doing it.

Suddenly she was pressing her lips against my cheek.

"You're so good to me. You always take care of me," she said. How much had she had? This was getting crazy. It was kind of funny. I put my other arm around her legs, stood up and started making my way to the exit with her. It was clear that she needed to go home.

"And I will always be here to take care of you. You're a bit too drunk to drive. I'll take you," I said, and carefully sat her down on the ground, while I unlocked my car and opened my door. Then I lifted her again, and put her in her seat. Without touching her, I managed to put on her seat belt, and then got in my self. We had a long ride home.

I smiled, as Elena fell asleep next to me, while I drove. Had I really managed to get her that drunk? More drunk than I had ever seen her before, but she'd seem happy. When she had went to the dance floor and that boy had held her, it had been too much for me. And she clearly wasn't sober enough to reject the asshole. Once again, I felt relieved that I hadn't gone with the blonde girl home.

I knew Elena was more innocent than what was good. It was her 20th birthday, and she hadn't even had her first kiss yet.

But she had always claimed that she wasn't interested in anyone else than her teddy bear. At some point, I had been wondering if she was a lesbian. But that suspicion had been demolished pretty quick. She would have told me.

I kept my focus on the road, but I couldn't think of anything else than my best friend by my side. She had been repeating the words, again and again.

"_I love you, Damon." _

It made me feel good. I knew she wouldn't leave me. She had been my best friend since forever. And I wouldn't know what to do without her. She had become the most important part of my life. I had no problem leaving the blonde girl at the bar, to go drive Elena home.

After all, we did live in the same house. And for whatever reason, she didn't like when I brought home girls. Maybe the sounds of her best friend having sex wasn't the most uplifting thing. She still was a virgin. Maybe it embarrassed her? She knew what I was like. I had brought girls home, ever since I lost my virginity at 15 years old.

We had talked about my girls, lot's of times. I had told her about my fear, of not being capable of loving a girl so much, that I wanted to stay with her forever. Her response had been a small shrug and then her eyes had been focusing on something on the floor.

A couple of days later, I had found out that my fear was stupid. She had told me that. And Elena knew me. If she believed in me, I believed her.

That had all been ruined when I got a girlfriend, and managed to be unfaithful five times within two days. I had told Elena about it, coming home crying from the knowledge of what I'd done. And she'd talked to me, tried to tell me that I was a lovable person. I just didn't believe her.

But today was her birthday. I wouldn't bring home a girl tonight. She deserved better on her birthday.

And now we were going to California together. I wondered what Caroline's plan had been. She never did anything without a plan. I knew her well enough, to know that. I just had no idea what her plan would contain.

We had never been on a vacation, all three of us. Elena and I had been traveling a lot, going on vacations, and Elena had been to many places with Caroline, but we never went all three of us. Neither one of the girl's had shown any interest in going together.

So what was her agenda? Something had to be off.

Were the two girls planning on a three-way? No. Elena was still a virgin. She wouldn't be alright with something so naughty. And of course she wouldn't want me to be her first kiss, or her first time. No, that was another guy's job. A guy she deserved.

Even though I didn't doubt it would be wonderful, sleeping with Elena. She was a beautiful girl, I had always known that. And her lips were so soft looking.

What the hell, Damon?! Why on earth was I thinking about stuff like that? I shouldn't be thinking about her like that. She was my best friend. Having sex with her would ruin everything.

I pulled in when we reached our house, and parked in the garage. Then I got out, and opened Elena's door. She was still sleeping safely. I smiled, unbuckled her seat belt and then carried her towards the house. Silently I opened the door, and started walking towards her room. I would find some painkillers and water for her after wards. She would be having the worst hangover in decades tomorrow. I remembered from my own 20th birthday, and she had drunk at least the same amount that I did.

Without any trouble, I walked up the stairs and opened the door to her room. I smiled as I saw the familiar room. I had always liked it. It had always fit her.

Carefully, I put her down on the bed and started taking her shoes and jacket off. I didn't want her to be hot. I would've taken her hoodie off, but I knew how she felt about those. She felt naked without them, uncomfortable. And I wouldn't want her to feel that way, because of me.

But as I turned to leave, her small hand grabbed my wrist and held me back.

"Please, don't leave me... Stay..." her voice sounded fragile, hurt. Like she was crying. Was she sad? Why on earth would she be sad? She had just had an amazing 20th birthday party! She was supposed to be drunk and happy. Maybe she was just having a nightmare.

"Are you awake, Elena?" I asked and sat down on the bed. Her hand didn't let go of my wrist. How could a girl her size be so strong? She opened her eyes and looked at me, her eyes full of tears. I frowned and looked at her. She was crying? Why?

"Please, Damon... Stay," she said, still holding on to my wrist. I nodded and she let go. I removed my shoes and jacket and laid down next to her. As soon as I was laying there, she turned to me and buried her head in my chest, tears flowing free.

I wrapped my arms around her and squeezed carefully. What was going on? Had the guy from the bar hurt her? He was going to pay. Nobody was going to hurt my Elena.

"What's wrong, Lena?" I asked and started stroking her hair. And for a few seconds, I closed my eyes, and let myself enjoy this moment. It felt nice, holding her. It felt right. And she fit perfectly in my arms, like we were made for each other.

But then she let out another sob, and I knew I had to focus on what was bugging her. I already felt the flames in my stomach. Nobody would hurt her. Nobody.

"I don't know for how long I can keep going, Damon. I'm breaking down." Her statement chocked and surprised me. What the hell had happened?! She was miserable! I had never seen her like that before. She sounded like she was suicidal!

But she couldn't be. She was always happy. And she told me everything. When something was wrong, she told me. So why hadn't I hurt about this? It obviously filled a lot of room in her life.

"Hey, hey. What's going on? Who's hurting you?" I asked and kept stroking her hair. She looked up from my chest, and the pain in her eyes surprised me.

But it didn't take seconds, before I'd figured it out. And as soon as I had, she knew I understood. I bit my lip, as I felt the tears forming in my own eyes.

"I miss them," she said, curling up next to me again. I tightened my grip around her, determined that the tears wouldn't show. It was a long time ago. But she knew how I felt, and I couldn't keep it from her. I just couldn't.

"I know, Lena... I miss them too," I said and kissed the top of her head. Her arm went around my stomach and she hugged me closer. I tried to ignore the feeling of my heart speeding up.

"Please, don't leave me, Damon. Don't leave me, like they did," she said. I felt my heart breaking at her comment. Did she think I was going to leave her? Noway in hell I was ever leaving her. She was my entire world.

"I won't leave you... I promise. Here, let me get my shirt off," I said and when she let go, I quickly got the shirt over my head, and hugged her again. She put her head on my chest again, and I couldn't help but feel my heart speed up even more.

I had missed doing this with her. We'd done this regularly, back when our parents had died. Back then, she'd been 13 and I'd been 17. Our parents had been really good friends, which had resulted in us spending most of our childhood together. And we'd been best friends since forever.

But then our parents had been to a party, on the night of a very big snowstorm. Their car had gone over Wickery Bridge, and all four of them had been dead as soon as the car hit the freezing water.

After a lot of discussion between our families, both of us had moved in with her aunt Jenna, and my dad's best friend, Alaric. They'd been an item for almost four years at that time, and they'd been happy to have us.

Our parent's death had only made us become better friends. She had grown up quickly, and some times I forgot the age span between us.

But it was seven years ago, which meant that she was starting to cope with it all. She hadn't been sad about it in quiet some time, and somehow, she seemed like she had pushed me a bit away. We used to sleep in the same bed, almost every night, crying and holding each other. But when she started to mature, started to wear those big clothes, she pushed everyone away.

But I hadn't let her. I wasn't ready to lose my best friend, and I hang on to her with all my power. Because she meant too much to me.

But now, as we were laying in her bed, it seemed like we were getting closer, once again. She let me hold her, and maybe she would even loose the big hoodie around me. I didn't want to push her, but I really didn't like those hoodies on her. The last time I'd seen her body, she had been a child. But she wasn't anymore. She was 20 years old, her body had matured since then.

And something inside of me wanted to see her body so bad. I had no idea why, but I really liked the thought of her showing of her body. But not anywhere else than at home.

Gosh, why did all these thoughts start coming tonight? It made no sense at all.

"I love you, Damon," she whispered, but when I looked at her, it was clear she was at sleep. Not wanting to wake her up, I closed my eyes and kissed the top of her head once again. No way I would ever let her out of my life.

**So yeah, I hope you guys all liked it! Pleeease leave a review! I'm really flowing with this story! It's easy to write, and I really haven't used to much time to check spelling mistakes. Hope you like it. **

**See you soon! **


	3. Chapter 3

**OBS! I DO NOT ENCOURAGE SELFHARM, IT IS A BAD BAD THING, DON'T DO IT! **

**Chapter 3: Elena**

When I woke up, my head was hurting like hell, and the whole room was spinning. It wasn't until I tried to stretch, that I felt a muscular arm around my waist. I opened my eyes wide up, as my heart sped up. What the hell? I frowned, and looked at the arm. Gosh, was that...?  
Something was poking very encouraging against my butt, distracting me from the strong arm. Oh my God, no. This could not be true. Carefully I turned around and faced the man.

Yes, that was my best friend, Damon. And it was his... Thing, that had been poking me. And it still was. How did we end up in my bed? Had we been...

I put my hands on his naked chest, trying to get a bit away. The fact that his erection made me aroused, was enough to scare me. I wasn't that kind of girl. Not yet, at least.

After being in love with him for almost fifteen years, I hadn't just given it up last night and told him, had I? And had I forgot what had happened? I felt like crying. What the hell had happened?! And why did I have to get so drunk?

I didn't really got more time to think about it. Damon was waking up. His grip around me tightened, and without opening his eyes, he pressed his lips to my forehead. I gasped, feeling his erection against my stomach, and tried to not think about getting naked and have my first time with him. Those were stupid thoughts. He didn't care for me like that. He never would.

Or maybe he would. If Caroline's plan actually worked, he would. What was it she had said to me, so many times? I had to make him see me as a woman, not his little sister. Well, maybe that had been exactly what I had done last night. I had no idea. I remembered absolutely nothing.

How much did I drink anyways? I remembered the 20 shots, but after that, everything was blank. What had I been doing?

"Morning," he said, and then he opened his eyes. When his blue eyes met mine, he looked surprised, scared. I had no idea what I should say. What I should do. I was waking up, next to the guy of my dreams, who by the way was half naked and aroused. How the hell was I supposed to react to that?

"Good morning, Damon..." I said, trying to smile at him. His eyes went big, when he noticed why my face was as red as a tomato. God, could this morning get any worse?

"Oh my God... I'm so... Gosh, Elena..."

Without saying anything else, he stood up and walked to my bathroom.

I felt like a little girl. Like a little ten year old girl, who just saw a naked boy for the first time. And I couldn't hold back the tears anymore. I just couldn't. Whatever we had done yesterday, he'd regretted it. Whatever he had done, with me, was just a mistake in his eyes.

I had ruined everything. No hope of getting with him now. Caroline couldn't possibly have a plan to save this.

And in that moment, the only thing I was able to think about, was the small blade in my dresser, just waiting to make a new cut in my skin.

I bit my lip and put my pillow over my head. I didn't care that I was going to ruin it with my make-up. I wanted to muffle my sobs, and I needed to think of something else than the blade. I couldn't do that.

I had been a cutter for some years. It had all began when Damon started bringing home girls every weekend. When I was laying in bed at night, trying not to listen to the moans and sounds, I'd found that the blade make me forget everything. And it had been bad for a long time. He hadn't even noticed.

But Caroline had. And she had forced me to stop. I had been without it for almost 1½ years at that point, and all I wanted to do was to return to the blissful pain.

"Elena?"

I felt the pillow slowly being lifted from my face, and I felt Damon sit down next to me. I looked at his worried face expression and his wet hair. He'd taken a shower? Hopefully a cold one. He sighed and moved a hand to my hair. Then he gently started stroking it.

"Damon, what did we do yesterday?" I asked, looking away. I didn't want to see his reaction. Didn't want to see the disgust in his eyes. I felt him laying down next to me, and wrapping an arm around me.

"Nothing. We came home, and I put you to bed, because you were beyond drunk. But you didn't want me to leave, and then you started crying. You missed your parents... Then I held you, like we used to do. Nothing happened, I swear. I wouldn't do that to you," he said. Good, I still had my virginity, and we hadn't been sleeping together.

Don't get me wrong. I wanted Damon to be my first. But I didn't want him to be my first, when both of us were drunk and didn't know what the hell we were doing.

No, if Damon were to be my first, both of us had to be sober, and completely certain that we wanted to do it.

I sighed, trying to sound relieved, and curled up to his side. Just like we used to. The blade was forgotten for a while. What I couldn't forget, only try to suppress, was Damon's face when he woke up and found out why my face was as red as it had been. I was never going to have him, was I? So why did I keep dreaming?

His hands stroked my back and my hair, while his grip around me tightened slightly. Like he really didn't want to let me go. I smiled and rested my head on his muscular chest. It had been a long time since we'd been in this position. At least 3 years. And I had missed it. But this couldn't last. There were things I needed to know. It sounded like he'd been pretty sober. And he hadn't even brought home a girl. He had been taking care of me instead.

"Damon, did I do anything... You know... Inappropriate...Yesterday?" I asked, fearing for the answer. We shifted a bit so that we were able to look into each others eyes. God, I loved those eyes. I wondered if he were able to see the emotions in my eyes.

Nah, then he'd figured out my feelings by now.

"You were about to... But I kind of stopped you... I wasn't sure if that was what you wanted or not," he said, slowly moving his arms away. Maybe that was for the best.

"Thanks..." I said and smiled gratefully at him. I hadn't wanted to kiss anybody else than Damon. No way. He returned the smile and got up again.

"Stay here, Lena, I'll be back in a minute," he said, while he put on his jeans and shirt. It suddenly became a lot easier focusing. I nodded, and enjoyed being tangled in the bed sheets, while I waited for him to return.

I felt happy that I had been able to resist the blade, once again. It would've been bad, if I had started again. Caroline and I were going shopping today, and I was sure she didn't have sweatshirts in mind. That wouldn't make me look like a woman to Damon.

No, new scars on my arms, would only make the matter worse. I had to stay strong.

I felt the butterflies fly around in my stomach. He was going to see the new clothes when we left on Friday. I had already decided that my first day as a new woman, would be that Friday. I didn't want to start trying to make him fall in love with me, at home. Ric almost saw Damon as his son (a son he could get drunk with), even though we weren't related in any way.

But it would be awkward, starting to flirt back, and doing the whole make-over thing at home. No, that had to wait, until we went to California.

And if I had started cutting again, there would be noticeable scars. The ones I had were slowly fading. You didn't really notice them anymore. I had never told Damon about my habit, because I would have no idea what to say to him.

'Hey, Damon, I've been in love with you ever since we were kids, and I'm cutting because I can't have you'

Nope, I had kept it a secret. It wasn't hard, when I was able to hide in my sweatshirt. He never pushed me to take it off, which only made it that much easier. But Caroline had noticed, and she had threatened to tell Damon, if I didn't stop. I hadn't touched the blade since then. I really didn't want to have that conversation.

I flinched a bit when the door opened again. Damon stepped inside, with something in his hands. I didn't see what it was, because he was hiding it. I frowned as he sat down on the bed, smiling at me. I caught the small glimpse in his eyes, and couldn't help but blush a bit. What did he have in mind?

"Yesterday, you told me you were afraid that I would leave you... Just like our parents. And even though I promised you that I'll never leave you, I want to give you this." He held out a beautiful necklace I recognised instantly. It had been his mothers. My eyes widened, first looking at it, and then at him.

"I can't accept that, Damon! That was your mother's," I said. He was really serious about this! How on earth could I accept one of the only things he had left from his mother?

"Yes, you can. And you're going to. Listen, Lena. Seeing you yesterday was terrible. I don't want you to think I could ever leave you. So, this is my promise. You know how much this means to me. And I want you to have it. As a proof, that I will never ever leave you. Never, Elena," he said and started giving me the necklace on.

"Damon..."  
"No, Elena. Just accept it. Don't say anything. You're my best friend. I don't know what I'd do without you."  
And those four words breaks me. _'You're my best friend'. _Friend. It feels like that word is repeating over and over in my head, once again. As if the night we shared didn't matter at all. It seemed to matter this morning.

But I couldn't let Damon see. No. I wasn't going to tell him anything. I would seduce him, when we got to California. Caroline would help me. I knew she would. That's why I smiled at him and kissed his cheek gently.

"Thanks, Damon. I don't know what I'd do without you either." I was almost sure he could spot the hurt in my eyes, but I tried not to think about it. He would think it was because of the memories of our parents. Not because he'd pointed out that I was nothing but a friend. I needed to be cool, keeping my feelings at bay for just two more days. I'd been keeping them at bay for fifteen years. Sure I could manage just a few days more.

He smiled at me, hugged me shortly and then walked out my room again. I broke down, the tears flowing freely. Gosh, I wouldn't be able to keep this up. But I had to. Caroline would help me, and I would finally get together with Damon. Hopefully.

I just had to trust her female instincts.

"Care, are you sure this one isn't a bit too... Showy?" I asked, when I looked at the top she'd put me in. It was incredibly slim, sticking like glue to my body. It had a low cut halterneck, which left my back almost bare. I felt naked and missed my hoodies. Why did I ever agree to do this?

"Of course it isn't too showy. Damon will love that, I promise. Now, put on this skirt as well. I picked up some nightgowns as well," she said and handed me a short skirt. I frowned.

"Nightgowns? Why would I need that?" I asked, as I stripped off my pants and put on the skirt. Now I just felt like a prostitute. This skirt was worse than the slimmy jeans she'd made me wear. How could I ever stuff like that?

"Well, there's something I didn't tell you and Damon..." she said, her cheeks turning red. Oh God, what had she done? That didn't look good.

"I'm bringing Matt. Which means you and Damon will have to share a room. I don't even know if there's going to be two beds," she said, then quickly leaving the changing room. Clever choice. I felt like exploding.

"You did WHAT?!" I said, following her, without thinking about my outfit. I almost bumped into a guy. His eyes went up and down my body, before he smiled at me. I mumbled a 'sorry' and ran after Caroline. She couldn't be serious! This morning had been bad enough. I did not need a repeat of that, in California.

"Calm down, 'Lena! It'll be okay. You'll get to get closer to him. Promise. I know what I'm doing. This will perfect," she said, and handed me a pair of shorts. I sighed and accepted them. I guessed I just had to trust her.

When we were done shopping after several hours, we sat down on the nearest café, ordering coffee. I was exhausted after our shopping trip. I hadn't done that, since my mother was still alive. I missed her. I remembered when I was younger, and I had been in my room, crying, because Damon had invited another girl to his high school dance. Somehow, I'd hoped he would've taken me.

"_Elena? Honey, are you alright?" My mom stepped into my room and sat down on my bed. I turned towards her, and showed her the tears on my cheeks. Her face expression went worried at once. I never cried. _

"_What's wrong, sweetie?" she asked, and gently stroked my hair. I closed my eyes, and got my breathing under control before I answered her. _

"_I love him, mom. But he'll never like me. Never. Because I'm just his friend. His annoying little sister," I said, feeling the tears starting to float down my cheeks again. I had wanted to go with him. But instead he picked Andie Starr. The blonde slut from his Spanish class. _

"_Oh, honey. Don't you worry. Right now, the age span between you and Damon is large. A lot happens in those four years. But there's no guarantee he'll never love you. Actually, I think he already loves you. He just doesn't know how much. Let time work it's magic. And don't push him away. It'll be okay," she said and smiled at me. I sniffled and looked at her. _

"_You think he loves me?" I asked, feeling a bit better. Maybe my mom was right. He was soon to be 17 years old. He already seemed so grown up. _

"_I know he does. Don't you worry," she said and opened her arms. I hugged her, feeling a lot better. My mom was the best mom in the world. _

"_Thank you, mom," I whispered, as I sniffed the familiar scent of vanilla on her clothes. I would never get enough of that scent. Never._

"_No problem, sweetheart. I love you." _

She had died less than 6 months after that. God, I missed her. She would know what I should do. She always knew what to do. I sighed, as Caroline talked on about Matt, her boyfriend. Apparently he'd been crazy for her yesterday.

"Caroline? Do you honestly think I have any kind of chance with Damon?" I asked and looked at my cappuccino. I could almost feel her frown. I had asked her that question so many times, and her answer never differed.

"Of course you have. Elena, he's going to see you in this, and he's going to see how much he loves you," she said, taking a sip from her coffee. I sighed and did the same. Caroline would help me. I would have him.

**So there you go. Chapter three. Please, leave a review! Tell me what you think, and what you think is going to happen! **

**If you have any things you would like for them to do in California, please leave a suggest! Review! **

**Thank you!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Damon**

"Elena, come on, we have to get going!" I said, after waiting for almost ten minutes. How much time did she need anyway? It was eight o'clock in the morning, and I was almost falling asleep standing. And I was the one driving to the airport? God, I needed coffee. I didn't want us to crash on the way. She trusted my driving skills. No way I was letting her down.

"I'll be down in a minute!" she yelled from her room. I sighed and started dragging my bag to the car. She would be down soon, or else I would have to go and get her. I had no problem carrying her down the stairs. She didn't way anything. She had never been one to spend a lot of time getting ready, but she was today. What was going on?

When I returned to the house, I heard her door open and her bag being dragged across the floor. Finally! But as she went down the stairs, my eyes widened. Now I understood why she had been in her room for so long. Her cheeks were red, as she dragged the bag down the stairs. Noway she could lift that heavy thing. I should help her, but I couldn't take my eyes off her, and I wasn't sure I was able to walk either.

She was wearing a pair of very short, light, denim shorts and a tight, red halterneck top. Her high heels made her legs look like they went on forever, and made it impossible for me not to stare. Instead of her normal ponytail, her hair was hanging freely, framing her beautiful face. And she wore make-up! What the hell was going on? Not that I was complaining.

Her cheeks turned red as she reached the bottom of the stairs. Quickly I got to her and grabbed her bag, totally speechless. I could feel my self react to her instantly. Still my best friend, still my best friend!

I had always known she was a beautiful girl. You had to be extremely stupid not to notice that. When she took off her sunglasses and hoods, that is. But this was ridiculous. I needed a very cold shower. Unfortunately that wasn't going to happen right now. We were already running late, and we couldn't wait for me to calm down. _Fuck._

"You look... Great," I said, trying not to sound too out of breath. Because she made me feel out of breath. God, I wanted to feel those soft looking lips against mine. No! I couldn't!

"_Just relax, Damon, it's your best friend. Your very innocent best friend. You've known her since kindergarten for Christ's sake!" _I thought to myself, trying to calm down. Why hadn't I noticed she had such a beautiful body? All the nights I had held her, all the nights I had carried her? How was I able to miss that? Her curves were amazing. Bet her body would look even more amazing without the clothes on.

Oh my God, no! I could not be thinking that way. I simply couldn't!

"Thanks... Uhm... Ready to go?" she asked. I nodded. Why did she sound nervous? What did she have to be nervous about? If she'd decided to make-over, she shouldn't be afraid to show herself. Should she? And least of all to me. She didn't knew about the thoughts that were currently going through my head. If she did, she'd probably be scared and disgusted. I wasn't supposed to be thinking about such things. She was like my little sister. She'd always been.

We walked to the car, without saying a word. Her cheeks kept the red color, which only made her seem so much more sexy. My jeans were starting to get uncomfortable. I shouldn't be thinking about her like that! God! She wasn't supposed to make me react this way. I wasn't supposed so react to her at all!

As we drove, I kept my eyes strictly on the road. Neither Elena nor I were happy to drive, after what had happened to our parents. It had taken Elena a couple of years to get her license, because she was too scared. I had already had mine, and after a few months, I had started driving back and forth between school and home. After a year, Elena had joined me. Besides her self, I was the only one she trusted with a car. She never let a stranger drive her anywhere. She only let me, which meant I had been her chauffeur a couple of times.

I turned on the air condition. I really needed to cool down. It had helped, just focusing on the road. My thoughts were getting away from Elena. If I could just managed to keep her out of my head for the rest of the trip, I would be happy.

"Are you excited?" Elena asked, after almost 20 minutes of awkward driving. I bit my inner lip at the irony at her statement. I was excited, alright.

"Kind of. It'll be great to get away from Mystic Falls. And it has been a long time since we went anywhere together. I missed it," I said, being completely honest with her. I always was. It had been almost six months since we went anywhere together. We used to go almost every vacation we had, but it had been different this year. It was great, knowing that we were going somewhere again. This time without any kind of parents.

"Yeah, it has... I've missed going to the beach. Will you go out bathing with me, when we get there?" she asked, a giant smile on her lips. Bathing? As in bathing suits? As in, Elena half naked? Oh God, she wasn't making this easy on me.

And what was with her, suddenly want to go to the beach again? The past couple of years, she'd shook her head and hid in her giant sweatshirts, if you suggested the beach. What the hell was going on? What had caused this change?

My grip around the steering wheel tightened, as I looked at her again. That top of hers didn't leave much to the fantasy. A fantasy that shouldn't be in my head _at all. _

"Sure. It's been a while since you've been at the beach," I said, trying to sound completely normal. She really didn't need to know about my thoughts. She would hate me, if she knew what was going through my mind at the moment. And since when was I losing control like this? I'd seen girls dress a lot more slutty than her, and been able to keep in control. This was my best friend, and I had no idea what I should do.

"Yeah. But I've decided that I need to change. And this vacation is exactly what I need to... Mature," she said, and leaned back in her seat. I frowned.

"Mature? Lena, you're 20 years old. You are mature," I said, wondering why she could possibly think she wasn't mature.

"Nah. I'm old enough to be mature. I'm just tired of hiding away, trying to be an all innocent girl. It's time to become... Well, a woman, I guess. I just need to have a taste of life. Be crazy. As you pointed out, I'm already 20. And I have yet to kiss a boy. Most girls my age is having sex and being crazy and... Yeah. Well, now it's my turn."

I felt my self getting angry at her statement. She was going to be crazy and go have sex with some random boy? No way in hell. Her first kiss, her first time should be with someone she knew. Someone who cares about her, and someone who will be careful. Someone like me... Oh God, no! Stop those thoughts, Damon!

"Elena, stop talking like that! You're not going to be crazy. We're going on this holiday, and it's going to be fun, just like we used to. We're going to hang out all the time, you, me and Blondie. Maybe we'll get drunk, but besides that, it'll be... Relaxed. A timeout from Mystic Falls. Did you plan on losing your virginity in Cali?" I asked, almost fearing the answer. Was that her plan? Going to California, going to a party and drag some boy to bed?

Well, if it was, I wouldn't let it happen. No way.

She shrugged it off, like it didn't matter. I sighed. Didn't she know the value of her virginity? She'd protected it for so long, and now she just wanted to give it to a complete stranger? What the hell was going on? Was she in love with someone?

I felt my self getting jealous just by the thought of her being with someone else. Wait, jealous? She was my best friend! Like my best friend. Not in any romantic way. Then why the hell was I thinking like I was?

"I don't know. Maybe. I'm tired of being the good girl. Maybe I'll loose it on this vacation. Why do you care anyway?" she asked, keeping her eyes on the road. Why the hell did she say that? She knew damn well that I cared about her. A lot!

And why didn't she look at me? This was a pretty serious conversation, and all she could focus on, was the road? What the hell?

"Of course I care. You're my best friend, Lena. And you shouldn't just... Give it up, to some random guy. You need to find a guy that deserves you. And it has to be someone you love," I said, tightening my grip around the steering wheel even more. Why did she have to wear those clothes? She knew exactly how I was with women. And she had to know that she looked amazingly beautiful, wearing clothes that actually fit her.

"You think that I'm going to go out and fuck some random boy? What the hell, Damon? Don't you know me at all?" she asked, suddenly sounding mad. It had to be that time of the month. There was no other logical explanation. Fucking PMS.

"Oh, that wasn't what you meant by being crazy? 'Cause that was what I got out of what you said. That you wanted to go out, get drunk and fuck some random boy. And that's not going to happen. Not at all. I won't let it," I said, starting to feel angry with her. Why couldn't she just understand that I cared about her? She didn't need to know that I wanted to be the one to be her first, but she needed to know that I cared about her. A lot.

Wait, I wanted to be her first? Were the hell was this coming from? At the thought of her, underneath me, love in her eyes, all naked, I felt my heart flutter and my appendage react at once. What the fuck.

"No... Of course I wouldn't just sleep with anyone. You know what, never mind. We shouldn't even be talking about this. Just forget I ever said something. I'm looking forward to go to the water with you," she said and started untangling her headphones. Oh, hell no! She wasn't just going to put them on.

I reached over and grabbed them. No way I was letting her hide behind those. Not from me. Something was way off.

"What the hell, Lena? You're going to just shut me out? Listen, I'm just watching over you. Ever since we've been small, you've never ever shown interest in any guy. Not even me. When you say stuff like that, start dressing like that, I'm going to be protective of you. Because I care about you. A lot. And I don't want you to get hurt. Your virginity isn't something you just let go off. Don't do like me. Wait, for that special boy. You'll find him," I said, and put her headphones in my pocket, without letting my eyes off the road. I was calmed down a bit now. She seemed angry that I had taken her headphones, but I didn't really care. I wasn't going to let her hide away.

She mumbled something that I couldn't hear. I sighed. What was going on? There was something wrong, and that something had something to do with California. I was sure. But what had changed? Except for her way of dressing.

I just had to watch her even more careful when we reached our destination. I would figure out. Whatever had changed, whatever had made _her_ change her appearance this much. I was going to find out.

"I'm sorry, Damon... I didn't mean to... I'm just a bit confused, okay?" she said, her voice suddenly sounding very fragile. Confused?

"Why are you confused? What's going on, Lena?" I asked, as I pulled into the parking lot of the airport. I wished we had more time, just being the two of us in the car. She wouldn't keep talking if Caroline were there, that was for certain. They were great friends, but still nothing compared to what we shared. Not at all. And now I was never going to figure out. Christ.

She didn't answer me, as we got a trolley and started walking towards the airport. I was getting desperate for answers.

"I just realised that what I've been fighting for these past years, isn't going to happen. Ever. And I need change," she said, as we went into the airport. I was going to question her even further, but Caroline and Matt were running towards us with their luggage.

Wait, Matt?  
What the hell was the football douche doing here? And why on earth did he have luggage as well? I had been tricked. But why? I looked at Elena. She didn't look at Matt. Her eyes were firmly set on her shoes, not looking up. Did Matt have something to do with this?

"Hey guys!" Caroline said, looking all ecstatic. I was getting more and more confused by the second. Elena had been fighting for something these past years, that she'd given up on achieving? And now she didn't want to look at Matt. Was she in love with him?

Suddenly everything started making sense. The clothes, the talk about her virginity. She was in love with Matt! And she wanted to... Oh God, no. Anyone but him.

"What's the quarterback doing here?" I asked, not caring if I sounded annoyed or rude. I was annoyed, and I really wanted to be rude to him. How the fuck could she possibly be in love with someone like him?

Maybe because she didn't know the truth about him. She didn't know anything about all the girl's Matt had been with, whilst he'd supposedly been with Caroline. Neither did she know anything about the drugs he'd been using and selling the past few years. Actually, she didn't know anything bad about him at all. Nothing. Only the good things.

To her, he must be sounding like the perfect boyfriend. That had to be the reason she was feeling something towards him.

I felt the angry jealousy that I'd been feeling earlier come forth once again. Why was I feeling jealous? It was clear why I felt angry. Elena wasn't going to let him pop her cherry. Not on my watch. I wouldn't let her. Because I wasn't going to let her get hurt by him.

Did I want to take her virginity my self? Hell yeah. That answer was a bit too quick to appear in my mind. A best friend wasn't supposed to feel like that. But maybe it was time that I tried to explore those emotions.

We were going to spend all our time together the next three weeks, in California. I had every possibility to be close to her, to start acting like more than a friend. And then she wouldn't be with Matt.

Oh my God, was I really going to do this? Guess I was.

"Well, there was something I didn't tell you, Damon. Matt is coming with. And he's sleeping with me. Which means that you and Elena are going to share a room. I hoped you didn't mind," she said, while Matt put an arm around her waist, and placed a kiss on her cheek. Elena kept her eyes on her shoes. Was that a big deal? We'd been sleeping in the same bed lot's of times. She knew I wasn't going to do anything. She knew she could trust me.

"You could have told me. It would've been nice knowing. Then I would've packed something to wear at night. Well, guess you'll have to sleep next to a naked man, Elena!" I said, joking. But I didn't miss the red color on her cheeks. Was she blushing? Guess she hadn't seen me naked since we were kids. Had she even seen a naked man before? Probably not. If she hadn't kissed one, she probably hadn't seen one naked. I kept forgetting how innocent she was, when she was wearing something like that.

"I'm kidding, Elena! It's fine. Let's just get going. Tax free alcohol!" I said, hurrying to check in my luggage. I felt her following me to the check-in. When I looked at her, she was still keeping her eyes on the floor, not looking at me. Her cheeks were still flaming with red color. And somehow, I found that quiet sexy.

We both checked in, and then went towards security. We would meet Caroline and Matt at the gate. For some reason, Elena didn't want to spend time with them. Was she jealous of him and Caroline? I hoped not. God, he didn't deserve her _at all_.

The security went fine. Elena had never been too fond of airport security, but she didn't seem affected at all. Maybe because she didn't beep.

When both of us made it to the other side (of security), I dragged her to the alcohol department. I had been very serious about the tax free alcohol. I wasn't sure if Elena was getting drunk during our holiday, but I sure as hell was. I was going to need it.

After shopping alcohol (to my surprise, Elena bought a lot of alcohol as well), we went on. When we walked passed a small bookshop, she stopped.

"Damon, would you mind going with me?"she asked nervously, as she looked at the bookshop. I knew she loved books, and writing. She was always writing, either in her journal, or in a small binder she brought everywhere. Sometime I would have to read it. I just wasn't sure if she would let me. Oh well, I would convince her.

"Sure. Let's go," I said, and followed her into the store. She walked in front of me, and all I could think of, was how much I appreciated the way her shorts were hugging her cute bottom. I was going to push the thought away, when I remembered my promise to my self. I was going to try to explore this, and I had absolutely no problem with looking at her behind.

"Are you getting anything?" she asked, ripping me from my trance. She was standing with a new journal in her hand, and another book, probably for writing. Hadn't she brought her own?

"I don't know. Maybe. Didn't you bring your own journal?" I asked, nodding towards the book in her hand. It was perfect for her. Simple blue design, with an E in the bottom. I smiled, as I remembered all the times I had caught her sitting by the window, writing in that small book.

One morning, the light had been shining at her face, and she had looked more than beautiful. That was until I noticed the tears on her cheeks. All I wanted was to wipe them away and hold her.

But I never let her know that I had seen her. Her journal was a private thing, and she didn't like when people got too close. I understood that, and I respected it. I respected her.

I had been unable to take my eyes off her for a moment. The morning sun's orange shine looked perfect on her olive skin, and the way she looked concentrated when she wrote was amazing. But the tears. I had wanted to help her. To be there for her. But I couldn't, so I went back to my own room, and hadn't been thinking of anything than her the rest of the day.

"Of course I brought it. But it's almost full. Time for a new one," she said, waving the blue book in the air. I smiled at her, looking at the other books at the shelves.

"Well, then maybe I should get one as well," I said, quickly smiling at her, before returning to the books. I had never kept a journal like Elena did, but she seemed happy to do it. Maybe it would be a good thing to try, now that I didn't have Elena to confide in. She wasn't going to know anything about my small plan. It worked for her. Maybe it would for me as well.

"You're going to keep a journal?" she asked, her brows almost disappearing when she raised them. I shrugged and picked out a black one. Funny enough it had a small D in the bottom right corner. Then I picked out a pen, knowing that I would need it. I hadn't brought anything like that.

"You, keep a journal? You are so not that type, Damon. You're not even going to keep that going throughout the holidays," she said, laughing. An idea started forming in my head, as a smirk spread on my lips. If she wanted to play...

"Why don't we bet?" I said, looking at her. I saw a flash of fright, before she pulled herself together.

"Fine. What's the consequences?" she asked, as she shook my hand. Did I really want to do this to her? Oh yes, I wanted to.

"A kiss. Whoever looses will have to kiss the other one," I said, trying to keep my smile innocent. Her eyes widened. Oh shit, she hadn't kissed a boy yet! I had forgot everything about that! How could I be so stupid? Oh well, she would surely just turn me down, and tell me that I was crazy. She wouldn't agree to those terms.

"You're on."

Wait, what? Was she being serious, or was she pulling some kind of joke on me? A part of me didn't really want to know. I just wanted to go on with it.

I let it go. Both of us went to the cashier, ready to pay for the journals and my pen. I couldn't keep my eyes off her, as we went on, walking through the airport. She was beautiful. How could I never have seen what a beautiful body she had? All the nights I'd held her, I hadn't once felt her slender waist, her full grown breast, her ass... Nothing. Maybe because I never had touched those places on her body.

But I remembered being happy when I held her, after her party. It had been great. Holding her, like she'd been mine. How on earth had I managed to keep these feelings at bay?

Maybe because it was my best friend we were talking about. The girl I'd known since she was a little child, the girl I'd confided in forever. And now she was the woman I wanted. The woman I felt something towards. Fuck, how had everything changed so fast?

"You wanna grab some coffee?" she asked, when we passed a Starbucks. I woke up from my thoughts, and smiled at her.

"Of course. You know me," I said, as we walked to the desk.

"Hey, you two. What can I do for you?" the barista asked. She wore a name tag that said 'Mary'. I smiled at her and looked at Elena.

"The usual," she said to me, shrugging. I returned my look to the barista.

"One café latte and a frappuccino," I said, knowing that she loved their frappuccino's. We'd been visiting Starbucks more than once. A lot more than once actually. Enough for me to know exactly what she wanted.

"Coming right up! How long have you two been together?" she asked, while getting someone on the job of our coffees. Elena blushed and didn't answer. Hmm, maybe I should have a bit of fun. I was, after all, trying to seduce her. No, I wasn't trying to seduce her. I was trying to make her feel something towards me. I wanted more than just her in my bed.

"Three years," I blurted out, not really thinking of the amount of time we would've spend as a couple, if that had been the truth. Shouldn't I be holding her, placing kisses on her cheeks and forehead?

Yes, I definitely should. But she would be afraid if I did so. I would have to wait. That would come later on. Right now we were playing a game.

"Wow, that's a long time. You must really love each other," Mary said, a big smile on her lips. Then something unexpected happened. Elena reached up and placed a very gentle and very soft kiss on my cheek.

"We do," she said, looking at me, as if she was totally love struck and had been for several years. I smiled at her, knowing that I would love for her to look at me like that every day. I would love to see the love in her eyes, feel the love when she said my name. But that wasn't the case. Not yet, at least. Where was all of this coming from?

I wrapped my arms around her waist, and slowly dragged her towards the place where you pick up your coffees.

"Now, let's go get our coffees, honey," I said, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead. If she wanted to play on, I would so too. She followed me, her muscles completely relaxed beneath my touch. She trusted me with this? I had expected her to be tense and insecure. But she wasn't. Not at all.

We got our coffees and sat down in one of the couches furthest away from the desk. We should be able to talk together without the barista listening in. She surely wanted to question me about this. But she didn't. She just sat down and started playing with her straw. I cocked my head and looked at her. God, she looked beautiful. I really loved that she'd let her hair be loose. It was beautiful. No, that didn't really cut it. She was amazingly perfect.

And when she looked up at me through her long lashes, a completely innocent look in her beautiful doe eyes, I couldn't help but feel my heart skip a beat. How long had I unconsciously felt this way? Maybe a bit too long. I remembered moments where I'd shortly reacted to her, rather strong. That was even though she'd been wearing her hoodies. How on earth had I managed to be so blind?

A smile spread on her lips, as she let the straw out of her mouth, and laughter rose in her eyes.

"What are you staring at?" she asked, slightly blushed.

"You," I said, not thinking about my talking at all. As soon as the word was out of my mouth, I regretted it. I wanted her to know that I was ready to take our friendship to the next level, but I wasn't just going to give my self over. Nope, I was going to make her fall in love with me, by being the perfect gentleman. I wanted to be the man she had always wanted.

She blushed and looked at her coffee again. I smiled. I affected her.

"What? Can't I look at you? Last time I checked, this was a free country," I said, checking the clock on my cellphone. I didn't want us to miss our flight. She laughed and looked at me again.

"I guess you can. I'm just not used to someone staring at me. It's not very polite, you know," she said, still laughing a bit. I smiled at her.

"Well, get used to it. I like looking at you," I said, placing my usual charming smirk on my lips. She shook her head and started sipping her coffee. God, she looked cute.

"So, why did you pretend we were going out? I would've thought you wanted to flirt with her? She was cute," she said, nodding towards the barista. I shrugged.

"Nah. Wanted to have a bit of fun. As I recall, you played your part in it as well," I said, still feeling her lips against my cheek. She shrugged and leaned back in the comfortable couch.

"It was fun. I liked pretending we were going out," she said, while she played with the straw of her frappuccino. Wondered what she would think of actually going out with me. If we were going out, I would be sitting next to her, not on the opposite side. My arms would be around her, and I would be planting small butterfly kisses on her face. And I would be happy.

What the hell. Was I turning into some kind of sappy romantic? What the hell was this girl doing to me?

I had to keep my game up. I couldn't just give in to her, as I really wanted to. I wanted to lean over, and kiss her. Make her first kiss worth it. But I couldn't do that. At this moment, she didn't feel anything romantic towards me. She wanted that douche, Matt. But I was going to change that. No way in hell I was letting her run away with that guy.

"We should get going. There's not much time to the plane is taking off. Come on," she stood up, and together we started walking towards the gate. I couldn't wait to show her, just how perfect we would be together. She would never know what hit her.

**So, there you go! Chapter 4... Pleeease leave a review! Next up is Elena's point of view! **


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: Elena**

"You wanna grab some coffee?" I asked, as we came closer to a Starbucks. Both of us had been up really early, and both of us were really tired. I was going to sleep on the plane. No doubt about that. Hopefully Damon would do that as well.

I was starting to think that Caroline's advice actually had worked. I had felt Damon's eyes on my back all morning. And when I had looked at him, he looked like he was completely gone in his thoughts. I was desperate to know what he was thinking about. Was he really thinking about me? Could it be true?

I had also noticed the way Matt looked at me, when we were back before the security. I had kept my eyes on my shoes, trying to ignore his staring. It was uncomfortable. He was with Caroline. He definitely shouldn't be looking at me that way. Damon was supposed to look at me that way. And he did.

My heart rate had been way up high, ever since I had stepped down the stairs this morning. I was constantly nervous. I had no idea what Damon thought about my change of outfit. Did he like it? Did he think I looked like a slut? What did he think?

I had absolutely no idea. And I hated it.

"Of course. You know me," he said, with a very charming smile printed on his lips. Something in his eyes had changed. But what was that? I had to remember not to rush stuff, and come to conclusions that weren't true. He wasn't just going to give himself over, just because I changed my appearance a bit. No, this was going to crave a fight.

And then there was the bet we had going. Normally I would've never agreed to those terms. But it was Damon, and I wanted him. That's why I had said yes. And by then end of the holiday, I would know how it felt to kiss my best friend. And I couldn't wait.

There was no way in hell he was going to keep up that journal. I hadn't been able to keep it up, when I first started writing. The only reason why I had succeeded, was because of my mother.

Mom...

I wondered what she would think, if she was here now. She had always liked Damon. And our parents had been sure that we were going to end up marrying each other. But I wasn't sure they had actually been certain about that.

I was dragged away from my thoughts, by the barista.  
"Hey, you two. What can I do for you?" She was smiling as if her life depended on it. I took a quick look at her name tag. Mary. And then I couldn't help but notice how pretty she was.

She had a complete model body. Slender, tanned beautiful skin, long legs, long arms and a beautiful face. Her blonde hair was up at the moment, but it was clear how beautiful it was. I wasn't sure if I could take Damon flirting with her.

But it was Damon. This girl looked fantastic, and he was going to flirt with her. He always flirted with all the pretty girls. And then he brought them home. And I would spend the night crying in my pillow, while I listened to the moans and groans coming from his room. At least he didn't have a bed to take her too here. He only had a bathroom, and I would be able to escape.

I noticed that he was looking at me, as if he was waiting for an answer to something. Oh, right, we needed to order something.

"The usual," I said, with a small shrug. He looked at the barista again, and I looked away. I didn't want to see his flirty looks, and the way he would be leaning over the counter to flirt with her. No way.

"One café latte and a frappuccino," he said. I smiled, as he remembered what I liked. Well, we had been visiting Starbucks a lot. Both of us were completely addicted to coffee, and I loved spending time with him. Lucky for me he didn't see our coffee dates as real dates. Just us hanging out. And that was also how I liked it. Except for when he flirted with the barista's.

"Coming right up! How long have you two been together?" I felt my cheeks getting red and I looked at my shoes. I was just waiting for his response to her. He would tell her that I was his little sister, and that he'd never do anything with me. But she could come with him, if she wanted to. His usual flirting move. But this time I wasn't okay with hearing it.

"Three years," he said.

Wait, what? Did he tell her that we were together? I smiled as I looked at him. He kept his look on the barista. My heart was beating even faster now, and I felt completely happy. If only it was true. If only we were actually dating. That would be the best thing in my entire life.

Well, if he wanted to play a game, I would be on. Caroline had told me to let go of the old shy me. I needed to be a woman now. Mature, and able to seduce a man. So, if Damon wanted to play, I wanted to play as well.

"Wow, that's a long time. You must really love each other." The barista looked happy. I pulled myself together, and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek.

"We do," I said, looking at him, the way I wanted to look at him. I didn't keep my emotions at bay. I let every single one loose, showing him just how much he meant to me. A smile spread on his lips, as he looked into my eyes, happiness going through his eyes.

He wrapped his arm around my waist, and gently pulled me on.

"Now, let's go get our coffees, honey," he said. I smiled, as I felt his soft lips on my forehead. God, that felt nice. And I liked his arm around me. I relaxed completely, and even leaned a bit into him. This was right. This was how it was supposed to be. Did he feel the same as me?

We got our coffees and sat down on some couches in the back of the restaurant. We would be able to talk here, without the barista listening in.

I know I should have started questioning him about the whole 'pretending like we were dating' thing, but I didn't. I just played with my straw, feeling extremely nervous. This felt like a date. A lot more than it usually felt like, when I was with him. I looked up at him, noticing that he was staring at me, with a small smile playing on his lips. I blushed.

"What are you staring at?" I felt like a small school girl. Not like the 20 year old woman I was. Maybe because I wasn't a woman. I hadn't even kissed a boy, for Christ's sake. I was still the small school girl I felt like, when Damon was looking at me, like he was.

"You," he said. I felt my cheeks turning even more red, and returned my look to the coffee. I felt my heart flutter. I wanted to be his girlfriend. Just like he'd said to that barista. His girlfriend. My heart sped up once again, at the thought of being his.

"What? Can't I look at you? Last time I checked, this was a free country," he said, looking at his cellphone. What was he checking? Messages from someone? Or maybe just the time. Probably just the time. He surely didn't want us to miss our flight.

"I guess you can. I'm just not used to someone staring at me. It's not very polite, you know," I said, still laughing. He never seized to amaze me. He smiled at me. Something in his eyes had changed. I just wasn't sure what it was.

"Well, get used to it. I like looking at you," he said, finding his charming smirk. Wait, that smirk was something he used when he flirted with girls. Why was he giving me it? I shook my head and sipped my coffee, trying not to let it affect me. It couldn't have been. I didn't see clearly. That was it. Because Damon would never be flirting for real with me.

Sure, he always came up with inappropriate innuendos and flirted with me. But he never meant it, and I knew that. I'd seen him, when he was actually going after a girl. That wasn't anything like what he used to do with me. And even though I would love it, he probably never would.

I felt my cheeks turning red again, as I could felt his eyes on me. Did I have something in my face? Oh God, it had to be my make-up. I wasn't used to wear that stuff.

I had to bring something up. But what?

"So, why dd you pretend we were going out? I would've thought you wanted to flirt with her? She was cute," I said, nodding towards the barista. She was serving someone else, smiling at them,exactly like she had smiled at us. She was the one, who had asked about us. We had looked like a couple. A real couple.

He shrugged and leaned back in the couch, relaxing. I smiled at him. He was wearing the same clothes as always. Black t-shirt, black jeans, black boots and his black leather jacket. He rarely wore anything else than black. Sometimes dark blue, and I had once seen him in a white shirt. That had been a sight for sore eyes.

"Nah. Wanted to have a bit of fun. As I recall, you played your part in it as well," he said, raising one eyebrow. I bit on the inside of my chin, while I shrugged casually and leaned back as well. Stay cool, stay cool. What would be casual to say?

"It was fun. I liked pretending we were going out," I said, trying to look innocent while I played with the straw. So not cool. God, this was already a disaster.

He didn't know what to say. That had the be the only reason he kept quiet and sipped his coffee. Not a word. His eyes indicated that he was somewhere far away in his mind. What was he thinking about? Us? Me?

No. That couldn't be it. He probably just regretted pretending we were going out. Now he couldn't flirt with the barista, or anyone else in the café. It had been his choice after all. Not mine.

"We should get going. There's not much time to the plane is taking off. Come on," I nodded and we gathered our things and started walking towards the gate. On the way, I checked my make-up in a small hand mirror, relieved that everything was looking fine.

But then what had he been staring at?

"I'm really looking forward to this holiday," Damon said, as we walked through all the shops. Both of us was in desperate need of candy, and we hadn't brought anything from home. It was kind of a tradition for us to share candy on the plane. Jenna and Alaric had always found it rather funny, but it was normal for me and Damon. Another thing we just did.

"Me too. I've always wanted to go to California," I said, looking at some chocolate. I needed chocolate. This was going to be tough. Damon seemed to be thinking of something all the time, and I was getting insecure. I missed my hoodies, and I really wanted to cover up. I wanted to hide my body. Men in the airport were looking at me, and I was starting to feel very uncomfortable. I wasn't used to the attention, and I really didn't like it.

I wanted Damon's attention. Not all of the old and disgusting men in the airport.

"You are incredibly tense, Lena. What's wrong?" he said, lowering his voice. I bit my lip and looked into his wonderful blue eyes.

"I just don't like the way all the men are staring at me. I feel kind of... Naked. I miss my hoodies," I said, not being able to lie to him. Quickly he shrugged his leather jacket off, and handed it to me. I frowned and looked at it.

"Take this. It'll cover you up a bit. And then people will think we're dating. And no one is going to take as much as one wrong look at _my _girl," he said, and put the jacket around my shoulders. I blushed, but accepted his jacket. It smelled like him. Like alcohol, leather and... Well, him. It isn't something I can explain. It's just this special scent of Damon. And it made me calm down.

And I felt like I was back in the game. He wanted to pretend like we were dating? Fine by me.

I stood on my toes and pressed my lips against his cheek once again. Then I went back down and smiled at him.

"Thank you," I said and then moved on to the chocolate. Damon followed me, not letting me out of his sight. Why was he being so protective of me? Normally he would've laughed, and said that I had nothing to worry about. But to pretend like we were dating, were something completely new. He'd never done anything like that before.

Both of us got our candy, and then we moved on to the gate. When we left the candy shop, I felt his arm around my waist, pulling me closer. Once again, my heart rate went up like crazy. It felt like his hand sent small electric shocks out from the places he touched me.

Like it was the most natural thing in the world, I leaned into him, enjoying his embrace. So this was what it was like to be Damon's girlfriend. Except for the kissing part. He hadn't kissed me, and probably weren't going to. Not unless he lost that bet. Then he would be kissing me. I couldn't wait. I really couldn't. I wanted to feel his lips against mine, and I wanted it soon. But I had to wait. Caroline would make sure that he would start seeing me as someone worth dating, not just a best friend, or a little sister. Everything would be fine. Hopefully.

"Thank you for doing this, Damon," I said, as we got near the gate. I wanted to enjoy being in his embrace, just a bit longer. We both stopped walking, and turned towards each other. He wrapped the other arm around my waist as well, and pulled me closer. Our bodies were now touching each other, and I was sure he was able to feel my heightened heart beat.

"Everything for you, Lena," he said and placed a gentle kiss on my forehead. God, his lips were soft. I smiled at him and wrapped my arms around his neck, making us look even more like the couple we were pretending to be.

"I really mean it, Damon. I felt really uncomfortable before. Thank you for helping. I know it must be a bit weird, pretending like you're dating your best friend," I said, looking down for a moment. I felt the blush on my cheeks, but at the same time, I felt tears stinging in my eyes. Now he was going to come with some sort of point, that proved to me, that I was never going to be more than a friend. And that would break me.

"It's not weird. I like it. My jacket looks really nice on you," he said and smiled at me. I looked up again, surprised by his statement. He liked it? Seriously? Maybe this clothing thing were a bit more effective, than Caroline had said. He already seemed to be flirting a bit with me.

"And I would do anything for you, Lena. You know that," he added. He was smiling at me, a small sparkle in his eyes. Oh God, we were so close. I felt his entire body against mine, and all I really wanted to do, was to kiss him. But I couldn't do that. I didn't want my first kiss to be completely rejected, by the boy I really loved.

"Now, if you had kissed a boy before, I would kiss you. To proof to people that you were mine. But I don't think your first kiss should be of that reason," he said, moving one hand to push a strain of hair behind my ear. I blushed and looked away from his eyes. If I kept looking, he would notice. He would see that I wanted him to kiss me. And then he would probably be scared. I couldn't let my self forget, that this was just an act. We weren't together. Yet.

"Let's go to the gate," I said, moving my arms from his neck. Even though it felt like it was the most natural thing, to hug him like that, I had to get a bit away. I wanted to kiss him too badly. It was too much to me. He nodded and placed a kiss on my forehead.

His lips felt warm and soft on my skin. God, how I wanted to feel those lips against mine. Not just against my forehead.

I got out of his arms, and started walking towards the gate, him following behind me. Maybe I was walking a bit fast. But Damon had long legs, and had absolutely no problem following me. We were silent, when we reached the gate. Matt and Caroline were already there, holding hands and sharing spit. And somehow I wished that was me. Not with Matt, but with Damon.

Matt and Caroline's relationship wasn't healthy at all. As far as I understood, they weren't even exclusive. They were just fucking and snogging all the time. But at least they were together. I didn't want that kind of relationship with Damon. I had seen him in those relationships before. He had been with girls, lot's of girls. And he hadn't been exclusive with any of them. That was what he had told me.

And I didn't want to be another one of these girls. Just someone he could fuck whenever he wanted, and when he got bored, he fucked someone else. No, that wasn't something I wanted. I wanted him to feel the same as me. To care about me, to want to make me happy with him.

It was going to be a long time, before that was going to happen. But hopefully it would happen. That was the whole idea with this vacation. That was the whole idea with Caroline's plan. Why did I even agree to all of this?

"Now boarding passengers to flight 4590, California."

The woman's voice on the speakers were annoying. Completely monotone and somehow still flirty. How did she do that?

We gathered our things, and found our boarding passes, as we started standing in line. Damon was right behind me, holding his one hand on my hip. The feeling was unfamiliar, yet comfortable. It felt nice. I felt protected.

The woman looked at my ticket with absolutely no feeling and let me pass on. Then she smiled at Damon, as she took his ticket.

"Hello handsome. Going to California?" she asked, a flirtatious smile on her lips. He smiled back at her, the same kind of smile on his lips.

"Well, yes, I am," he answered, getting his ticket back. I rolled my eyes at them, feeling a bit hurt that he would flirt with her.

"I'm going with my girlfriend, as a matter of fact," he said and then walked over to me, kissing my cheek, "let's board, sweetheart."

My heart fluttered at his words. The second kiss he had placed on my face. I had to remember, this was just an act. He didn't care for me in that way, he never would. And I had to remember that. I couldn't let my self forget the real reason why we were going. I was going to have him. We were going to be together.

The act was going to be a reality. That was what Caroline had promised, and she usually got what she wanted.

"You're with someone like her? Somehow I find that hard to believe," the flight lady said, just as we were about to board the flight. Damon turned around, bringing me with him. His hand were still resting on my hip, and I had no way of escaping his embrace. I really didn't want to hear what awful things she was going to say.

"And why don't you believe that?" he asked, pulling me closer to his body. He was making it perfectly clear that I wasn't leaving his side. Fuck. Maybe my first kiss would happen today.

"Well, first of all you deserve someone way better than her. I mean, look at her. Not sexy enough, at all. And second of all, I don't believe that act the two of you have going. You're not together. You didn't even kiss her. So, why don't you just give up this act, and come with me to the toilet on the plane? You know you want to."

The rest of the passengers had already showed their tickets, and were standing in line to get on the plane. As always, they had to wait for everyone to find their seats.

"First of all, bitch, she is perfect. Don't you dare say that she isn't good enough, 'cause she is. She is mine, and she's more than I deserve. Way more. Second of all, I don't know why you would think this was an act. Because it isn't. I love this girl, more than I have ever loved anyone else before. So no, I'm not going to the toilet with you. I'm not the type to fuck sluts. Now, I suggest you do your job properly, instead of flirting with costumers, that clearly are in a relationship."  
Damon was furious. I had never seen him like that before. All of his body was tensed up, and his grip on my waist was getting tighter and tighter. He always got angry when people said bad stuff about me, but I had never seen him like this. He looked like he wanted to kill her. I leaned into him, letting him protect me.

The lady opened her mouth to say more, but Damon didn't want to hear it. He started walking towards the plane, dragging me along. I couldn't help but smile a bit. He'd protected me, and he had actually sounded like he meant it.

"You do _not _listen to what she said, Lena. You are good enough," he said, as we went to the plane. Most of the passengers were already on board. We quickly found our seats and Damon put our bags in the overhead lockers. I wasn't really tall enough to do it. Then we sat down and got comfortable, listening to the security. I had made sure I had my diary, pen and headphones with me. It wasn't a long way to California, but I felt like I needed to get a lot of things out.

"I don't know, Damon. Maybe she was right. There has to be a reason why I'm still... You know. Innocent," I said and shrugged, not looking at him.

"No! Why do you believe people like that? She obviously just wanted to hurt you and to make you feel like shit. There wasn't any truth to her statement. Maybe except for the part of us dating, but that doesn't matter. Don't believe her. I meant what I said. You're perfect," he said, forcing me to look at him. I blushed and tried to look away, but his fingers were firmly holding my chin in place. How could he say something like that?

"Damon... You know how I feel. And I'm missing my hoodies. I'm missing being able to hide away from girls like her. If I hadn't been dressed like this, there had been no reason for you to pretend that we were dating. You would've been flirting with her, and as soon as this plane leaves the ground, you would be with her in the bathroom, having sex. Maybe this was just all a mistake," I said and hugged his jacket closer, trying to hide my body. It was way too big, and almost felt like my hoodies. The only thing missing, was the hood. I had to live without that.

"How can you say that? Elena, you look amazing. This isn't a mistake. And I wouldn't have been on the toilet with that girl. We're going on vacation. I don't want to start fucking people when we're together. I didn't mind pretending we were dating. Not at all. I would gladly do it again. You do not believe her, Lena. Just forget what she said," he said, gently brushing my cheek with his thumb. I blushed and was finally able to break away from his gaze.

I felt the familiar feeling of the plane leaving the ground, and started feeling safe. Damon was with me, and we were going on vacation together. And maybe our relationship would take flight. That was the plan. I couldn't let my self get down because of this.

"Okay... Thanks..." I said, opening my journal. I knew he would leave me alone, when I opened it. My journal was completely private, and he respected that.

_Dear diary_

_Here I am, on my way to California with Damon. Yes, Damon. We're going on vacation together again, but this time will be different. Caroline is here with us, and so is Matt. This was actually Caroline's idea. At my 20th birthday, she made me promise that I would do something about the whole Damon thing. Somehow I promised her that she was going to help. That's why I'm sitting in the plane, only wearing some sort of red tanktop and a part of very revealing shorts. Yes, I went through a make-over. All for the sake of getting Damon. _

_Anyways, she made sure that Damon and I will be sleeping in the same room, when she invited Matt. No way Matt and Damon was sharing a room. They can't really stand each other. No, it's clear that this would be the best way of sharing the two rooms. As far as I'm concerned, there isn't even two separate beds. We're going to share a bed, and I'm a bit scared. I'm actually going to do something, and try to get together with him. Caroline has taught me a lot of things about flirting and stuff, and I'm going to try them off this vacation. _

_I think it's going well. When we walked through the airport, men kept staring at me. That's why Damon pretended to be my boyfriend. I'm still wearing his jacket, actually. He held me, and kissed my cheek and forehead. I hope he'll someday kiss my lips. But I didn't want my first kiss to be pretend. I want it to be real. And I want it to be with Damon. Somehow he also seem different. He's been way more flirty, and even though he had the chance to sleep with the stewardess, he didn't. He kept our pretend relationship, and told the girl off. It was amazing. _

_We made a bet. If he can keep a journal throughout the entire holiday, I have to kiss him. If he don't, he has to kiss me. So, either way, I'm going to get my first kiss this vacation. I can't believe it's actually going to happen. It was his idea to make a kiss the terms. And to be honest, I don't have a clue why I agreed. But I did. _

_I wonder what mom would say, if she could see me now. She has always been fond of Damon. Our parents always spoke of us being married when we got older. But I'm not sure she would've liked it, if she knew what he was actually like. Mom never saw the girls he brought home. _

_I wish she was here. I miss her so much. She would know exactly what to do, with this whole Damon thing. She would listen to me talk about him, let me get everything out, and then she would be able to help me. She would make sure that even if he hurt me, I would be okay. _

_But she isn't here. Caroline is, and she's going to help me. She just isn't mom. She'll never be able to talk with the same experience mom had. And she'll never understand me, the way mom did. The only person that understands me, just as she did, is Damon. And I can't talk to him about all of this. Imagine me telling him that I was hopelessly devoted (I watched Grease yesterday, sorry) to him, and that I had no idea what to do about it. He would run like hell. _

_Because that's what Damon does. As soon as one of his girls has started talking about feeling with him, he ran from them. And I don't want to loose him. But I have to take this chance. Caroline told me to either do something about it or to move on. And I chose to do something. _

_That's why I'm wearing make-up, wearing these clothes and I'm not wearing any kind of hoodie. I'm only wearing Damon's jacket, as a protection against all the looks. It smells like him. Even though he's sitting right next to me, I like being able to smell him so close to me. I wish I could do that more often. I really do. Well, maybe that's going to happen._

_I don't know, Diary. But I will find out. Wish me luck._

_Elena._

**Sooo, that was chapter 5! I hope you all liked it. Please remember that it is illegal to have sex on airplane bathrooms. I know there aren't many people actually following that rule, but I feel like I should point out that it's illegal! :p **

**So, what do you think? Are they flirting too much? Would you have liked anything different? What do you think Elena will do, to make Damon notice her? What do you think will happen, when they reach Cali? Who will win their bet? PLEASE leave a review! They make me write faster! ;) **


	6. Chapter 6

_**Oh my God, thank you so much! 24 reviews on the first 5 chapters, that is AMAZING! I don't really have a specific time where I update. I can start to see a pattern in my writings, which tells me that when I'm going to update, it's probably going to be any day, except for the weekends. I don't know why, but I'm not really writing when it's weekend. Kind of weird, but true none the less. **_

_**So, here's chapter 6! I hope you all like it, even though it's kind of a filler. See you!**_

**Chapter 6: Damon**

I felt furious, as Elena started writing in her journal. I couldn't get over the fact that the flight attendant had talked to her like that. Like she wasn't good enough. She had absolutely no right to talk to her like that. And I couldn't believe that Elena actually believed in those nasty words. How could she doubt herself in that way? Didn't she know she was perfect?

Probably not. She had never really been secure about her self.

I remembered the feelings I had discovered she held. Feelings for Matt. That probably didn't make her feel any better. To be in love with someone, who didn't seem to want her. The least he could do was to appreciate what she felt towards him. And how on earth was it possible that he didn't want her? She was perfect, pure amazing.

Those feelings were soon to be forgotten. I was going to make sure of that. Completely sure. And hopefully, she would rise feelings towards me instead. And I would make her feel wanted. I would make her feel like a princess. Like my princess. Because that was what she deserved. She deserved to be treated like a princess. Like the most precious thing on this earth.

If she wanted me, I was done with all my girls. I would only have Elena. No one else. She meant too much to me, for me to be unfaithful to her. And I really liked her.

Usually, when feelings started to appear between me and a girl, I ran. Elena knew that. She had been the one I had confided in, when I had been a girl unfaithful or had done something else, to push them away. I didn't like the whole feeling thing. Things would get too serious, and I hadn't been ready to settle down.

But I was now. Only with Elena.

I looked at her, as she sat beside me, buried in her journal. She looked beautiful, as she always did. I loved looking at her, when she wrote in her journal. I loved seeing her so concentrated. It was like she became someone entirely different.

Her writing made me think about our bet. I had no idea if it was going to last all through the vacation. Elena made it seem so easy. How hard could it be? Write your thoughts down on a piece of paper? Maybe it would even become helpful, in my attempt to make my best friend... Well, more than just a friend.

I had to at least give it a try. If I didn't succeed, she would have to claim her own first kiss. I wanted it to be given to her. And I wanted it to be after a comfortable and romantic evening in my company. She deserved something special. Not just an insecure kiss, because of a stupid bet.

She sighed as she closed the journal and returned it to her bag. She still had the white headphones in her ears, shutting me out. She seemed like something was off. Was it that Matt guy again?

Maybe I should ask her. Make her tell what was the matter with her. Then everything would be easier. I was sure it would. I poke her arm, making her take out the headphones. Loud music were playing from them. Did she want to ruin her ears completely?

"What's wrong? You said something about fighting for something that were never going to happen," I said, remembering our conversation in the parking lot. She had never mentioned Matt before. Never. So why did she make it sound like she had been in love with him for years? Why didn't she tell me these kind of things? Was it possible, that she had been in love with him for years, and hadn't told me?

Perhaps.

"Nothing's wrong, Damon," she said, turning her head away from me, reaching to plug her earphones back in. I grabbed them and took them once again. She wasn't going to just dodge me. Not this time.

"Now, I don't think that's entirely true. So why don't you just give up and tell me? Do I have to force it out of you?" I said, trying to lighten the mood. I wasn't doubting that she was sad. Not at all. It was clear. But I had absolutely no idea what it could be, besides Matt.

She sighed, knowing that I wouldn't return her headphones before she had told me. And she knew she couldn't hide it from me. Not forever. I was going to get it out of her, sooner or later. Hopefully sooner. As soon as she admitted that she were in love with Matt, I could make her fall out of love with him. And maybe even in love with me?

"Damon, leave it. You know what, I think I'll go see Caroline."

She was out of her seat before I could move a muscle. That girl was way too fast sometimes. I sighed and leaned back, looking out the window. There was nothing to see, except for gray skies. Great. Even the weather sucked.

Since when had she started trusting Caroline, anyway? I thought I had been the one she confided in. Why hadn't she told me about Matt? Didn't she trust me, when it came to guys? We had never talked about the subject. Every time I had tried talking to her about boys, she had cut me off.

"_I'm not interested, Damon. I'm just not ready for a relationship or anything like that. I'm fine, staying innocent."_

It had been the same comment every damn time. And how was I supposed to get this out of her, if she didn't trust me? It seemed like I was going on Mission Impossible.

What the hell had I gotten myself into?

"Oh my God, it's so hot here!" Elena exclaimed, as we went outside the airport, our luggage on trolleys. She took off my leather jacket, handing it to me. I accepted it, as I tried not to look at her upper body. It didn't help. My imagination took over, making me picture her all hot and sweaty, underneath me. Her face filled with pleasure, and my name coming off her lips, in a moan. Oh God. I felt my jeans getting tight once again, and tried to think of something else. I didn't want her to see how much she turned me on, just yet. And I really didn't want Caroline to see that I was turned on. Did Elena pick out that outfit herself? No way in hell. She would never know what to put on, besides big pants and a sweatshirt. She hadn't been wearing anything else the past 7 years! Somebody must have helped her. But who? And what had she told them?

Her only girl friend were Caroline, and maybe it wouldn't be the best idea to tell her, that she was in love with her boyfriend.

But no one else could have helped her. So, what did she tell Caroline, to make her help with the new clothes? Did she say she was in love with someone else?

This whole affair was starting to get frustrating. All my life, I had been sure that Elena confided in me with everything. That she would always be there. Now I wasn't so sure anymore. If Elena got together with Matt, and he broke her heart... No, I wouldn't let her! I never wanted her to get hurt. That was the point of all of this.

I felt desperate need for a drink. Why hadn't I gotten one on the plane? I should have known this would be tough. I had never been pursuing a girl before, that wasn't willing. And this was my best friend.

I followed the girls, as they started walking towards the car rent. Matt was clinging to Caroline, never leaving her side. What was up with that boy? When we were back in Mystic Falls, he fucked around and did drugs. But here, he almost seemed sweet. He was holding Caroline, following her and placing innocent kisses all over her face.

For a short moment I imagined it to be Elena instead of Caroline. I couldn't help but feel mad and jealous. No way I was letting that happen.

Caroline had made sure we had a car, before we took off from Mystic Falls. Wasn't exactly the car I would've picked, but I guess I had to survive. I missed my Camaro like hell.

When she motioned to get in the driver's seat, I stopped her.

"No way. I'm driving, you're telling me where we're going. We don't want any accidents, and I'm the oldest here," I said and got in the car. Caroline sighed and hurried to the back seat with Matt. Elena rode shot gun. Yes.

Caroline helped me set the GPS for the right location, and then we were off. Finally. Elena just sat silently behind me, looking out the window, while Matt and Caroline were very occupied with each other on the back seat. God damn it, couldn't it wait? I remembered that I had taken Elena's headphones, and gave them back to her. She looked at me with a surprised look and then looked at the earphones.

"I get it, Lena. It's okay. We'll talk about it later."

Her smile was grateful, and she placed a small kiss on my cheek before plugging the headphones in and turning up her music. A couple of minutes later, she was asleep. I smiled at the sight of her sleeping. She always looked so peaceful. Like something that used to bother her, disappeared when she was sleeping. That would probably be Matt.

I turned on the radio, trying to ignore the couple in the back, while I drove. They were getting just a tad too close to each other, and I really didn't want to see anything between those two. This was going to be a long ride.

"Wakey wakey, kids. It's time to get up, we're here," I said, as I pulled in. We had finally reached our destination, and everyone besides me were sleeping. I wished I had slept on the plane. I was dying from the lack of sleep. The first thing I was going to see in that house, was my own bed.

Caroline and Matt woke up, and quickly got out of the car. Elena kept sleeping. I smiled at her and got out. If she wanted to sleep, she was going to sleep.

I opened her door carefully, got the seat belt off her, and gently lifted her. I tried not to think about the body that were resting in my arms, as I carried her inside and walked up the stairs, hoping the bedrooms were up there. I was right. There were two bedrooms, both with king sized beds. Guess Elena and I would be sleeping in the same bed. Or I would be sleeping on the couch. Usually she didn't have a problem with sleeping in the same bed as me, but she had been different, ever since we took off.

I placed her on the bed, thinking she wasn't going to need the covers. It was hot, and it wasn't getting colder anytime soon. It was almost noon, which meant the sun would be at it's highest. As I put her down, she wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me down beside her.

"Damon..." she whispered. I wasn't sure if she was asleep or awake. I had absolutely no idea, but I knew that she wanted me to stay. That's why I wrapped my arms around her, and pulled her closer. She found the usual position, and rested her head on my chest. I kissed the top of her head and made sure that she felt safe. I would go get our things later. Right now, Elena needed me. And I would get her what she wanted. I always did, somehow. Even when I didn't want to.

To be honest, I had no idea what this girl was doing to me. She had been my best friend since forever, so naturally I cared a lot for her. But things were moving forward at a very fast pace, and I wasn't quiet sure I was ready for that. I was Damon Salvatore for God's sake. I didn't fall in love, and certainly not with my best friend.

But as crazy as it seemed, that was exactly what was happening. And I was falling hard, and it took most of my strength not to run for the hills. I didn't want to leave Elena. No way. She meant way too much to me. But I hadn't been in love... Ever. And I was scared as hell. But there was no way I was going to admit that. Not even to Elena. No, especially not to Elena. She couldn't know that it wasn't just any girl I was crushing on. It was her.

No, all of this had to stay a secret. A secret between me and my new journal. That would be the only thing to know about all of my feelings. God, I felt the biggest pussy of the century. Was I really doing this?

Yes, I was. Because I needed to win that bet. Even if it meant writing down my thoughts on stupid paper. I was going to give Elena her first kiss.

My heart sped up, as I thought of her soft lips on mine. God, they had to be wonderful. What I wouldn't do, to feel her. Hold her, love her, kiss her.

I was getting ahead of my self.

I placed yet another kiss on her head, and then snuck away from the comfort of holding her to my body. I needed to help the others bring in our luggage, and Elena needed sleep. I could take a very cold shower while she slept. God knows I needed that.

I silently let my self out of her room, and went downstairs to help the others. They were struggling to lift the heavy bags into the house. I rolled my eyes at them, walked over and grabbed mine and Elena's bags, lifting them easily.

I totally get that Caroline wasn't able to lift hers – I mean, that girl is small after all. But it was fun to watch "strong, badass" Matt trying to lift the bags. I laughed a bit, as I walked back inside and put the bags in our room. Elena had woken up.

"You left," she stated and crawled out of the bed. I frowned and nodded. How much did she need me? Wasn't it Matt she needed?

"How long was I out?" she asked and went to her bag. I looked at the watch on the bedstand. She hadn't been sleeping for long.

"All the way on the road, and ten minutes back here. I was going to let you sleep and make sure everything was okay when you woke up. You hungry?" I asked and started unpacking my stuff, just like she was doing. She shrugged.

"Not really."

Once again I frowned and looked at the watch. She hadn't eaten since this morning, and she only grabbed an apple. That was almost 6 hours ago. She couldn't not be hungry! I wasn't going to let her starve herself. No way. She was thin enough already.

"I could make you something you like?" I said, trying to make her hungry. I knew she loved my cooking. I had been cooking for her for a long time. Cooking and baking. Her skills in a kitchen wasn't exactly great. Actually, she had a habit of setting things on fire, when she tried to cook. I didn't want that fate for the beautiful Californian kitchen. No, I would cook for her, as always. I liked doing that.

"I don't know. I'm not really hungry," she said, disappearing into the bathroom. I frowned. What the hell had I done? Why was she freezing me out? I hadn't done anything!

After a few minutes, I followed her into the bathroom, only to be totally chocked. She was sitting on the floor, hair covering her face, sobbing uncontrollably. What the hell was happening?

"Elena? What's wrong?" I sat down opposite of her, and put my arms around her, trying to soothe away the pain. This was the second time within this week she had been crying, and this time it wasn't at night. This time, it wasn't a nightmare. Something was wrong, and I wanted to know what it was.

"Could you get me Caroline?" she asked with a small fragile voice, and looked up at me. Caroline? What the hell did she want with Caroline? I was here! Her best friend.

"Caroline? Aren't I enough anymore?" I asked, trying to seem like I was joking, when in reality, I was dead serious. This had to be bad. She always told me things. Always. So why was she keeping this a secret?

"Damon... Please, don't make this harder than it already are. Please... Get Caroline. And when you leave, take my bag with you..." I looked at her, as though she had gone insane, but I quickly let it fall. I couldn't resist her. I needed to do what was right for her, because I couldn't do any less for her. No way.

I stood up and grabbed her bag, just as she had told me to, and then went to get Caroline. This had to be some kind of girl thing. But why didn't she tell me?

I guess I just wasn't suitable for this secret. She hadn't told me when she got her period either. Maybe this was something similar?

I had no idea. I just knew I wanted to make her better. So I hurried to their room, slammed the door open, and found Caroline on top of Matt, only in her underwear, kissing him fiercely. I rolled my eyes at them.

"Blondie. Elena needs you. Now! So I suggest that you put on some clothes and go to her. She's in our bathroom. She needs you."  
I didn't wait for her answer. I just walked out again, and back to the toilet. She was still sobbing, but not as bad as before. I sat down next to her and pulled her to my lap, embracing her. She rested her head against my chest. She was still shaking a bit, and I couldn't help but wonder what the hell was happening.

"Elena, you know that you can talk to me about anything, right?" I asked quietly and stroked her hair. I knew she liked when I did that. It calmed her down, and that seemed like something she needed right now.

"I know... Some things are just better between two girls," she said. It almost broke my heart, to hear her say that. I had never doubted my self, or doubted that I loved my self, but this made me feel like shit. Wasn't I good enough for her anymore? Was I really losing my best friend?

"It's fine, Lena. Caroline will be here shortly, I promise. Until then, you'll have to settle with me," I said, trying not to sound too upset about it all. I was afraid of losing her. So damn afraid.

The holiday hadn't even started yet, and she was breaking down. This wasn't going to be easy. And I had no idea what she wanted to tell Caroline. It would be impossible for her to tell Caroline about her feelings for Matt. That would be... Wrong. And so not Elena. Why didn't she speak to me? Why didn't she confide in me?

"Damon... I'm not settling with you. You're my best friend... Actually, you're the most important person in my life, and I wouldn't know what to do without you. I mean, if I didn't have you, I would've never gotten through our parents..." she stopped speaking, as I watched pain flicker through her eyes. It still hurt her. A lot more than it hurt me.

She had been a lot younger than me, and her connection with her parents had been a lot different. She had loved her parents, and her parents had loved her more than anything else in this world. My father had hated me, from the day I was born. Even though I had my mother, it wasn't always enough. I kind of needed a father figure in my life. The closest to that, had been Elena's dad, who saw me as his own son. A son that Elena maybe was going to marry when she got older. He always said that to me. Always.

_Flashback -_

"_Damon, young man, can I speak to you for a minute?" Grayson looked at me with the same warm look, that he always held. I nodded and let Elena continue up the stairs to her room, telling her that I would be there in a minute. _

"_Sure," I said and followed him to the Gilbert living room. He handed me a beer, with a smile on his face. I frowned a bit, uncertain whether I should accept it or not. Was this some kind of trial? To see if I was okay to hang with Elena, now that I was getting older? _

"_Don't worry, Damon. I know you like beer, just take it. I do also know that Elena will like beer within a few years."  
I laughed at his statement and accepted the beer. He was completely right. As a sixteen year old boy, I loved beer. Beer was what I drank to get drunk, and I liked it. _

"_Sit down... Now, what I need to talk to you about, may seem somewhere... Embarrassing to you. But don't worry, I'm not doing this to embarrass you. Not at all." _

_I frowned and sat down on the couch, sipping my beer. Great quality. Not just the usual keg from the parties I had been to. This was real beer._

"_You and Elena has been friends for a very long time now. Actually, almost since you were kids. And you've always taken great care of her. And I know you will keep on doing that. I can see that you are quiet fond of my daughter," he said, sipping his own beer and leaning back in the couch. Where were this conversation going? I didn't really like it's direction. Even though Grayson was a father figure for me, I didn't really want to be having the sex conversation with him. Especially not if it was going to involve his daughter. _

"_I am, sir," I said, trying not to be disrespectful towards him. It was as though he had changed all of sudden. This wasn't Grayson anymore. It was Elena's father, and I needed to make the best impression, because I wanted to have Elena by my side forever. It didn't matter if it was as my best friend, or as my wife. _

"_No need to be so formal, Damon. It's fine. Now, you know how much I care for Elena. She is my little girl, and even though I wish she could stay my little girl forever, I know she isn't going to. She's turning 13 soon, and I know that she sticks to your side. All I want you to do, is to take care of her. I will sleep safe at night, knowing that you are taking care of our daughter. I trust you to take care of her and to protect her. I trust that you won't hurt her. I just need you to confirm for me, that you'll take care of her, when she starts going to bars and stuff like that. Teach her what alcohol is, and make sure that she's safe. Make sure that she won't get used, when she get's... Drunk. Take care of her," he said, suddenly looking very serious. I had no idea what to answer to that. Of course I would always take care of Elena. I loved her, and I would never let her drink alone. Of course I would do all the things Grayson asked me to. Without a hesitation. _

"_I will, Mr. Gilbert. I promise you that," I said, forgetting to be casual with him. I couldn't help but see him as nothing but Elena's father, and I needed to make him like me, to make him trust me. A smile spread across his face, as he stood up and shook my hand. _

"_I'm glad. Oh, and Damon?" I was on my way up the stairs, but turned around and looked at him, "I trust that when you two starts dating, you will be taking care of her as well. I'd love to have grand children, but not before she's at least 25." _

_I swallowed at the statement and nodded, before walking up the stairs. How could he know, that she was the only woman I wanted to be with? _

I shook my head at the memory and tightened my grip around Elena. I didn't want Caroline to separate us, but she was going to when she came up here. I was totally certain. And maybe I should stop being so selfish, and let Elena get what she wanted for once.

"Elena, honey, what's wrong?" Caroline sunk down to the floor beside us and looked at her best friend. I took that as my cue, kissed the crown of her head, and then left them to talk. God, how I wanted to be the one she confided in.

_**Well, that was it. PLEASE leave a review! It would mean the world to me. Even if it's just a quick 'great' or a quick 'you suck, kill your self' then bring it on! **_

_**I hope to see you all soon! Promise to try and keep the updates coming. **_


	7. Chapter 7

**So, here's chapter 7. It is very short, I know, and I am sorry, but I need to make this fit with the rest of the events, going on in this story! **

**The lovely Foreverfirstloves is helping me out with this one, and she is doing an AMAZING job. I have no idea what to do without her! **

**So, I hope you all like this, and I hope to see you soon!**

* * *

**Chapter 7: Elena**

As soon as Caroline sat down beside me, and Damon left, I broke down again. I couldn't do this! Who on this earth was I kidding? I couldn't be what Damon needed! No way!

"I can't do this, Care. I can't go through with it," I said, as she wrapped her arms around me and hugged me. I couldn't stop the tears from rolling don my cheeks. This had all been a very stupid idea. I just wanted to change into my own old clothes, go down and have fun with Damon, just like we used to. Then maybe I would feel a bit more comfortable with him.

"Of course you can do this! Elena, didn't you see the way he's been looking at you all day? Do you think he would've pretended to be your boyfriend, if he didn't think you were hot? You know how Damon is. You're just nervous. Remember what I said. Either you do something, or you get over it. Because then I will help you find another guy, you can kiss and maybe even sleep with. It's time to either let Damon go, or fight for him," she said, trying to calm me down. And somehow, that worked. I stopped sobbing.

"I don't want to kiss anyone else. I want him to be my first, Care. I just don't know how I will ever be enough for him. He's used to girls like the one at the airport. Girls who flirts with him, who's sexy and confident. That's not me. Even though we've known each other for a long time, I'm still insecure with him," I said, trying to figure out what I needed to do.

Caroline smiled at me and started wiping the tear stains away from my cheeks.

"I know, Lena. And I think he's going to be that guy. You just need to show him how wonderful you two could be together. First step, you're going to be sleeping in the same bed. And you're going to wear that nightgown I bought for you!"

I blushed at the thought of it. Caroline had bought one of those nightgowns you see in commercials for Victoria's secrets and stuff like that. I couldn't imagine my self wearing it, but somewhere along the way, I had promised Caroline to wear it. That, and the small bikini she had bought for me.

I had no idea how I was ever going to pull that off.

"I wanna start cutting again, so bad... I can't help it..." It suddenly hit me. When I had left for the bathroom, all I wanted to do was to grab my blade and add new scars to my arm. And why did I want to do that? I had no idea. I was supposed to be better.

"Elena Marie Gilbert, you are _not _starting that again! I worked too hard to make you stop, for you to just start again. Listen, I know that this is hard. You've been in love with him since forever, and it's going to be weird to start doing something about it. You've gotten so used to the other thing. But this is actually happening. And trust me, it's working. You haven't seen the way he looked at you in the airport. If I didn't knew better, I would say that he already is in love with you," Caroline said, suddenly looking very worried. I looked down at the remains of my scars. Did I really want to add a new one? This time I couldn't just put on a sweatshirt to hide it. This time I didn't have a sweatshirt. And this time, Damon would notice. Caroline was right. I had to be strong.

"Thanks, Care... I guess I feel better... I just needed to get some of it out, and since I can't talk to Damon. He's afraid he's not enough for me anymore," I said, feeling the same pain in my chest I had felt, when Damon had asked if he wasn't enough. Even though he had tried to make it sound like he didn't really care, I could see the hurt in his eyes. At that moment, I wish I could have just told him everything. But I didn't. I couldn't. All I really wanted to do, was to snuggled up to him, explain everything to him and hope that he wouldn't leave me.

But I couldn't do that. I didn't want to ruin our friendship and the chances of a romantic relationship. No way.

"Well, he'll figure it all out soon. You can tell him everything about all of this after wards. I'm sure he's going to love this story," she said and laughed. I found my self laughing with her and nodded.

I loved Caroline, and she was my only girl friend. But she would never come close to what Damon meant to me. I didn't trust her, like I trusted Damon. And I never would. Damon and I shared something special, after both our parents died in the same accident. We understood each other in a way that Caroline didn't understand. Both her parents were alive and well, living together as one happy family.

"You ready to go down to Damon? I think he's cooking lunch," Caroline said and helped me refresh my stained make-up.

"Yeah. I am. I hope he's making something delicious," I said and smiled at her, as she finished my make-up.

"There you go. As good as new. Now, let's go downstairs."

* * *

"You okay again?" Damon asked, as we walked down the stairs and joined him in the kitchen. The smell was amazing, and I felt my stomach react instantly. I loved Damon's cooking. He often cooked at home, especially when I was in a bad mood.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said and sat down on one of the bar stools closest to Damon. He smiled at me and focused on cooking. I loved watching the way his muscles flexed underneath his shirt. It was incredibly sexy.

"There will be lunch in about... 10 minutes, and I suggest that you girls change into your bathing suits, 'cause we're going in the pool after wards," Damon said, and looked down at my body. I felt myself blushing. Was he looking at my body, like he looked at girls at bars?

"Great idea! Come on, Elena, let's go change," Elena grabbed my wrist and pulled me down from the chair, back up the stairs. I sighed, and cursed Damon's idea. I wanted to spend time with him like we normally did. No way I was going to be able do that, if I was wearing a bikini. But Caroline had made sure that I didn't brought any bathing suits or sweatshirts.

"Go in, change, and come down. I'm sending Damon up to fetch you, if you haven't returned in ten minutes!" she threatened, before going to her own room. I shook my head lightly and returned to my and Damon's room. I looked at the big bed, and immediately felt the butterflies in my stomach, as I thought about laying in it, only wearing the gown and having Damon by my side. Usually I wore sweatpants and a sweatshirt to bed. This was something entirely else, and I had no idea how Damon would react.

I went to my suitcase, not wanting to think anymore about it, and started looking for the black bikini Caroline had bought for me. I was so no ready to show Damon my body. This was going to be awkward as hell.

When I found it, I went to the bathroom and put it on quickly. It fit perfectly and it actually didn't look that bad. But this wasn't how I wanted Damon to see me. An idea popped into my head. Caroline had made sure I got a lot of dresses as well. One of those summer dresses would be great over the bikini. Then I wouldn't be half naked while we were eating.

I smiled at my own brilliance and went back to the bedroom. Damon hadn't come up yet. I smiled and put on one of the white summer dresses. I still wasn't comfortable, but this was way better than only the bikini.

In that instant, Damon walked through the door and looked at me. A smile spread on his lips, as he looked at the dress.

"I thought we agreed on swimming suits?" he asked, as he walked to his suitcase. I blushed slightly and looked at my feet. I had put on a pair of blue flip flops Caroline had gotten.

"Yeah, but I was thinking that I would put on a dress. That way, I won't be half naked at the table, and you will be able to focus on eating," I said with a sweet smile, that I didn't know where came from. What did I just say? Was I flirting with him?

He raised an eyebrow at me, with a smile on his lips. He liked it. I knew that smile. That was the smile he did, when he got what he wanted. Did he want me to flirt with him?

"Well, then thanks for wearing that. Then I'll have the possibility to focus completely on you when you take that off," he said, and looked down at my dress again. I forced my self to smile and then left the room. My heart was pounding so hard I was afraid I was going to die. What the hell just happened back there? Did I just flirt with Damon?

While I tried to get my self back on track, I walked down the stairs and outside, where Matt was placing the food on the outdoor table.

"Hey, Lena!" he said, as I sat down on one of the chairs. He sat next to me, while we waited for Caroline and Damon to come down.

"Hey. It was kind of a surprise you decided to join," I said, trying to get a conversation to flow. We hadn't really been talking together, ever since Matt went to another college than me. We had been great friends during high school, but everything just kind of... Fell apart after graduation. The only way I got to speak to him, was through Caroline.

"Yeah. Caroline invited me, and how can you tell that girl no?" he said, trying to smile casually. I laughed and nodded.

"I so agree. If there's someone capable of making me do something I don't want to do..." I let the sentence trail out and leaned back in the comfortable chair. I already loved the resort. We were sitting outside in the backyard, which had a pool and hot tub. Apart from that, it had a big green garden, which lot of space to play games and have fun. This place was perfect.

Matt looked at the pool, obviously trying not to look too much at me. I smiled and laughed at him, which made him turn his head in confusion.

"You are allowed to look at me, you do know that, right?" I said while laughing. He blushed slightly and shrugged at me. Be bold, Elena...

I stood up and took off the dress, revealing my black bikini.

"I really want to get in. You with me?" I asked and dipped a toe in the water. It was nice and hot from the sun. Perfect. Matt followed my lead and took off his shirt, following me to the pool. He smiled at me and lifted me without saying anything. Then he jumped in.

I screamed and laughed as we hit the water. I was going to have fun, and Matt was a great friend. Both of us swam to the surface and started splashing water at each other.

I loved being in the water again. I hadn't been in a very long time, because nobody were to notice my scars. But my scars were faded enough now. You wouldn't notice them, if you didn't look closely. And who would do that?

"You're it!" I said and touched Matt's head, before I swam off, trying to get as far away from him as possible. As he started chasing me, I couldn't help but wish that it was Damon chasing me, not Matt. But I quickly pushed the thought out of my head, and focused on the game instead. I shouldn't be thinking about Damon now. And I needed to do stuff that didn't have him involved. Playing with Matt was a great idea. He was with Caroline, and I knew he wouldn't try any funny business on me. Damon would join us when he came down in his bathing suit.

I felt Matt grab onto my foot and pulled me closer. I screamed a bit, but let him pull me to him. He was laughing just as much as I was, and had a big victory smile printed on his lips.

"You're it!" he said and put his arms around me. I frowned a bit at the action and pushed at his chest. I did not like him this close.

"A bit too close, Matt," I said and pushed harder at his bare chest. He was a good looking guy, but I knew how he felt about relationships. And he was Caroline's. The girl code spoke clearly.

"Sorry. I'm not that used to shy girls," he said with something that clearly was supposed to be a smirk, but comparing to Damon, it looked like a very insecure smile. It didn't have anywhere near the effects of Damon's smirk.

"What are you two girls up to?"

I heard Damon's familiar smooth voice, as he stepped out on the terrace, wearing nothing but his shorts. Why had I never noticed how beautiful his chest was? His pale skin was almost shining in the sun.

But something was off. His look was cold, and he seemed sad. It only lasted for a second. Then his usual smirk was in place, looking at me.

"Come on in, Salvatore! It won't hurt you to get a little wet. And I bet I'm still a faster swimmer than you," I said, sending him a challenging look. He raised one eyebrow at me and started slowly walking closer to the pool.

"Are you challenging me, Gilbert?" he asked as he reached the edge of the pool. I smiled at him, trying to be as bold as I had been when I jumped in with Matt.

"Oh yes, I am. I will even bet you that I win," I said, keeping my smile. It was starting to turn into a smirk I had no doubt that I had learned from Damon.

"Win what?" Caroline stepped out in her blue bikini and sunglasses. I smiled at her and waited for Damon to explain.

"Elena here thinks that she's faster than me. I am about to prove her very wrong," he said and lowered him self into the water, "so what if I win? What will you bet?"

Be bold, Elena, come on. Just do it. You need to do this.

"What about we do the exact same bet as we did earlier? Unless you're afraid?" I asked, swimming a bit closer to him, while trying to look as confident as possible. His eyes widened for a second, making me doubt my actions. Of course he didn't want to kiss me. Why on earth had I thought that he would be interested in doing something like that? I was the one in love with him, not the other way around.

"What bet? Why haven't I heard anything about this?" Caroline said, clearly insulted. I had forgotten to tell her about the bet. She would've loved that detail. At that point, I didn't really get that I had actually agreed to that bet.

"You sure you want to do this?" Damon whispered, suddenly very close to me. I feel like my skin is on fire from where his fingers are touching my arm, and his breath on my face is almost enough to make me kiss him right there.

But the moment was ruined the instant someone grabbed my foot and pulled me underwater. I quickly saw Matt smiling at me, under the water, and started swimming after him. When we broke up the surface I jumped on his back, desperately trying to get him under the water. He just laughed at me, grabbed my thighs and started walking toward the stairs.

"Now, Elena, let's get some lunch. You guys on?"

Matt was now carrying me, as we stepped into the terrace and walked to the table. I blushed, as my whole body was exposed to Damon. This was the first time he saw me like this, and I didn't feel comfortable at all.

"Matt, let me down!" I said, trying to get down from him, but his hands were holding me firmly in place. I felt my face getting more and more red, as he refused to let me down.

"She said to let her down, Matt," Damon said, suddenly not sounding like he was having fun at all. Actually, he was ice cold. Matt let go of my thighs, knowing that Damon wouldn't hesitate to start a fight, and Matt was going to be the loser. In most of my time, I hadn't met anyone with the same size of muscles as Damon. Another reason that I always felt safe with him. He would protect me against anything.

I walked to Damon, accepting the big towel he handed me. But instead of just giving it to me, he wrapped me up in it and started drying me, while pulling me into his arms.

Normally I would've questioned his move, but I really didn't care. He was half naked, and I liked being close to him. No, actually, I loved it.

"Ready for lunch?" he asked and handed me my sun glasses. I tried to pull off a smile, but it came out as an insecure grimace. His mouth was almost next to my ear and I could feel the top of his chest against my back. How was I supposed to focus with him touching me like that?

He chuckled a bit and stepped back, letting go of the towel. It fell down and revealed my body. I didn't miss the way he looked at it, and smirked as he sat down on the chair by the table.

All red in the face, I sat down opposite of him, and put on my sun glasses. Maybe that could give me some kind of privacy. But even though both of our eyes were blocked behind toned glass, he still looked right through me. That's why I kept my eyes on the delicious food he had made for us. Look at the food, not his body, food, not body, food, not... Why did he have to be half naked?

**Sooo, that was chapter 7! PLEASE leave a review! It would mean the world to me. Also, if you have any kinds of suggestions to this story, PLEASE send them! I beg of you all! So, I hope that you use that small cute review button right down there, and leave a review! **


	8. Chapter 8

**Okay, this chapter, could not have been possible without Foreverfirstloves. Kasy, I have no idea how I would ever manage to get this out on my own. **

**So, she deserves so much credit for doing this! **

**I hope you like it. Second chapter I have for you today, uuuh! Hope to see you all!**

* * *

**Chapter 8: Damon**

It took less than an hour for everyone to finish eating. We had been talking, mostly Elena and I, and had enjoyed the food. Elena had seemed a bit off, though. After she had put on her sunglasses, she seemed a bit more confident, but not very much. I really wanted to spend more time with Elena, but Blondie took her back inside, and left me with the Quarterback and a mess of plates and leftovers. Matt tried to make small talk, but I wasn't interested. My mind was still on my best friend, and my thoughts were nowhere near pure.

Elena in that white dress had been stunning. She was tan. Actually tan. I had no idea how, since she was always wearing those damn hoodies, but she was. And it looked amazing on her. Her skin had looked so soft and creamy. And God those legs... But then she had taken off the dress, and her body had left me speechless.

Of course, I didn't get the chance to ogle it the way I wanted.

Fucking Donovan.

Who did he think he was, putting his hands on her? She deserved so much better. Besides, wasn't he here to keep Caroline occupied? Why wasn't he groping her up, instead of teasing Elena? I hoped Elena was okay. If Matt was leading her on, I was going to kill him. I really was. Elena was too sweet, to amazing to be hurt like that. No way I was going to let him play her.

Once the mess was cleared, I walked inside the house. Caroline and Elena were on the big white couch in the amazingly big living room. The whole house was modern. The walls were painted white, and was covered by paintings and other art stuff, I didn't knew a single thing about. The couch was turned towards the big fireplace, which Elena and Caroline were looking at. I'll hand it to Blondie, she didn't do bad on the place settings, though she was bound to get something right occasionally.

"What are you two up to?" I asked, walking over to them. Elena smiled at me, making my heart feel warmer.

"Deciding what we should do today," she said, looking at Caroline with a raised eyebrow. Had they been fighting or something?

"Ah," I smirked, noting that her white sundress was back in place. Thank God, then I would be able to actually focus. I would get it off her later.

"What's the verdict?" I asked, sitting down in a comfortable looking chair.

"I opted for just chilling here, laying at the pool and working on our tans, but Elena doesn't want to," Caroline said, shooting a glance at Elena. I smiled. Yeah, my girl wasn't a lay out and sunbathe kind of girl. That didn't explain her tan either.

"And what does Elena want to do?" I asked, directing my question at her. It didn't matter what she wanted to do. I would go with her.

"I would like to go see the beach," Elena admitted, "I've never been to the ocean before, and I saw it on the plane ride over, and well, that's really all I wanted for today..."

Her big brown eyes blinked at me, as if waiting for me to tell her no, that it was a stupid idea, and we should all flip through girly magazines by the pool with umbrella drinks. Why would I ever choose that?

"Yeah, that sounds so much better."

Her smile was shy, but rewarding. Blondie groaned at my choice.

"Really! Doesn't no one just want to relax?! I mean look at this house! It's incredible!" she said and extended her arms. I chuckled lightly at her actions.

"Yeah, well, so is the ocean," I argued, taking Elena's hand, and lifting her from the couch, "Matt can stay here with you."

Caroline shrugged, just as the Quarterback in question came in.

"Matt can what?" he asked, making all of us look at him.

"I'm taking Elena to the beach, you can keep Barbie company." A smile spread on his face and I fought the urge to roll my eyes. No question of what they would be up to the second we left.

"You're welcome," I shot, then looked down at Elena, "You ready?"

She nodded at me, with a big smile.

"Yeah, but we need a towel!"

"There's the one you used a second ago outside on the table. We can grab it." She nodded, that beautiful smile back on her face. I could get used to seeing that smile.

"Okay, then yes, I'm ready." I squeezed her hand and led her out the door, liking the way her hand fit in mine.

* * *

"Wow," Elena sighed contently, looking around as we left the property. I smiled at her happiness. It seemed a little too rare. But even I was in awe. California. It really was a great place for vacation. Our house happened to be across the street from the beach, so as soon as we were cleared around the corner, the ocean was in sight.

Elena squeezed my hand as I walked us over to the cross walk and hit the button. As we neared the ocean, she was all but skipping.

"Someone's excited," I chuckled. She stuck her tongue out at me, a teasing look in her eyes.

"I am allowed to be excited, aren't I?" I smiled at her.

"No Elena. You have to sulk in misery this entire trip. Fun is not allowed."

She giggled at this, and I rather liked the sound. The shell that usually hid her away from the world seemed thinner. And I planned on taking advantage of that. This was going to be the summer of our lives.

We got across the street and then there was nothing but sand and water...and people. A lot of people, though that was to be expected for a summer beach in California. Elena didn't seem to mind though, so I didn't care.

"Were you just wanting to stare at it, or are we actually gonna get in?" I teased, and she shot me a smile.

"Race you to the water?" I laughed, "Sure! But we probably want to sit down our stuff." I motioned to the towel in my hand, and then there were our shoes and the water bottle I had grabbed for us, just in case.

"Okay," Elena agreed, "Let's find a spot." We walked down the line a little and found a place where the people thinned out. There were lines of those little umbrella covers, so I picked one and sat our things next to it.

"You want me to put your sunglasses down?" I asked her. She probably wouldn't like for them to get wet, or lost in the ocean.

"Oh, crap, yeah," she pulled them off her head, "oh, and I guess this too."

In a fluid motion, she reached for the hem of her dress and pulled it over her head, revealing her black bikini, and a lot of skin. So apparently I have been fucking blind my entire life. How in the hell did I not know that this is what she was hiding under all those sweat shirts?

Her legs were long, flowing up into her flat, toned stomach, which I was able to stare at for the first time, ever. Not to mention her breast. God, they were perfect, and the bathing suit top curved so well against the-

"Damon?" Her voice cut through my thoughts and the blush on her cheeks shamed me. Great job, Damon, scare her off as soon as she get's half naked. That will work great in your favor!

"Yeah..." I asked, noting that I was a bit out of breath. What the hell was she doing to me?

"I thought we were gonna race," she reminded me, and her arms crossed self-consciously over her chest. Damn, now she felt bad about herself. I mentally kicked my own ass.

"Yeah, we are. It's just that...I've never seen you wear something that-" Sexy? Tempting?Mouthwatering? "Uh, revealing..."

She blushed deeper, and I couldn't help but like the color on her cheeks. It somehow made her look even sexier.

"Yeah, Caroline made me...I really shouldn't have let her, but she-"

"No," I interrupted, "It, uh...it looks good on you. Really." Good didn't even begin to describe how it looked on her. She was obviously starting to feel uncomfortable, and I needed her to loosen up a bit. When we were small, we had been naked all the time. Now, she was used to her sweats. And I was going to turn her from that. A body like her shouldn't be hidden.

She seemed surprised at the compliment, but smiled at me.

"Thanks." I nodded back, knowing that if I didn't do something soon she was gonna turn me into a drooling idiot. How had my best friend, who also happened to be completely innocent, managed to put me out of my own game?

"So...one, two, three!" I yelled, and took off across the sand. Elena yelled behind me, but was soon on my tail. I purposely slowed, letting her get neck to neck with me before we crashed into the water. I dove under, loving the rush, and the way the chill of it made me feel alive. Once I came up for air, I turned, looking for Elena. She surfaced a second later, wiping the water from her face.

She had been smart enough to not apply make-up before we left. If she had, it had been running down her face by now.

"You good?" I asked, making sure she wasn't hurt. That would've ruined everything. She nodded, as I noted the big smile on her face.

"God, this is amazing!" I chuckled as she laid her head back, then sun shining against her skin, "I could so get use to this."

"Me too," I smirked, but I wasn't talking about the water. Something about this felt right. Me and her, just enjoying life together. I hadn't realized how much it meant to me, until now. And it wasn't something I ever planned on giving up.

* * *

After a while of splashing and attempts of drowning each other, Elena wanted to get out of the water. I followed her toward our things, unable to stop myself from staring at her ass. Her whole body was so curvy, and perfect. How had this escaped my attention before? I had been holding her at night, as if she was my girlfriend, for crying out loud.

As we neared our things, I realized that I wasn't the only one with eyes on her body. Hell, half the guys she walked past were throwing her looks. I felt an irrational annoyance boil in the pit of my stomach and moved to put my arm around Elena's shoulders. It had worked in the airport. Why shouldn't it work this time?

It wasn't an unusual move for me, so she thought nothing of it, but I still felt the urge to glance around and made sure all those guys noticed that she was here with me, so they should put their eyes back in their heads. At this moment, I kind of wished I could put her back in her sweatpants and hoodie. Then no one else would be staring at her. No one else than me. Because I had to face it. Even with the big clothes, she was beautiful.

We reached our things and she grabbed the towel, laying it out and sat on it, leaving plenty of room for me. I took my place next to her, and handed her the bottle of water.

"Thanks," she offered, taking it and downing it in one drink. I raised an eyebrow at her.

"Were you a little thirsty?" She glanced at the almost empty bottle and shrugged.

"Yeah...I guess I was." She blushed slightly and I chuckled. God, she looked cute.

"Well we can go back home if you want to-" She was shaking her head before I was even finished. "No. I like it out here. I don't want to go back yet...besides, Caroline and Matt are probably...busy."

I laughed at her innocence.

"Oh, so you caught that, huh."

She smiled a little.

"Who would have missed it?" She sighed then, her gaze landing out over the horizon. I idly wondered if she was bothered by the thought of Matt with Caroline. I imagined that knowing what they were up to was torture for her. Except, she didn't really look sad. If anything, she looked more relaxed than I had seen her in a while. Was she already getting over Matt?

"You okay?" I asked, worried that the moment were ruined. She looked my way, and gave a small smile. The way the sun shone on her face, just made her look even more beautiful. I was falling hard for this girl.

"Yeah...I'm glad we took this trip," she said, tucking some of her hair behind her ear.

"Me too," I agreed, reaching for her hand. I used it to pull her closer to me, but instead of coming against my side, she laid herself down on the towel, letting her head fall in my lap, which was just fine with me. She closed her eyes as I let my fingers play with a strand of her wet hair. Now that she couldn't see me, I took the type to really notice every small feature of her beautiful face. I still couldn't believe that she was so tanned. Seeing that she didn't open her eyes again, I let my gaze wander down her body, taking in every curve, every inch of her beautiful olive skin. How had I never noticed her beauty? All the nights we had spent together, every time I had hugged her or held her. I'd never noticed.

We sat like that for a while, Elena relaxing while I stroked her head, then her face, and her shoulders and arms. I wanted to touch every inch of her skin, but refrained from doing so. I was just glad that she hadn't covered herself back up with that dress, because I was really enjoying this. Her eyes remained closed, and if it wasn't for her shallow breathing I would have thought she'd fallen asleep. Only with all the nights I'd spent next to her, I knew her breath deepened and slowed when she slept. No, she was still asleep. And this was peaceful.

The world went on around us for a while, and with each minute the beach cleared. I lost track of time, but knew that it had to be getting later. Still though, Elena was so relaxed, I didn't want to move her. She needed this more than I did. Besides, I didn't mind at all that she was this close to me, in so little clothes.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked quietly. She sighed, her eyes remaining closed.

"Life." I smiled, that was such an Elena answer. Vague, mysterious, and infinitely deep.

"What about it?" Her eyes opened, and she met my gaze. Something in her eyes had clearly changed. Something I couldn't define.

"I just don't want to waste mine. We never know how much time we are going to have...and I don't want to look back with regrets." I nodded, hearing the words she didn't say. She was probably thinking about our parents. We knew first hand what it was like to see a life taken away in the blink of an eye. And of course she wouldn't want to waste hers.

"I don't want to waste mine either," I told her and she smiled slightly.

"Let's make a deal." I smirked, wondering what she wanted. We already had one bet, and now a deal? Maybe she was beginning to be found of gambling.

"Another one?" I asked, and she rolled her eyes playfully. I sighed at the memory of our journals. I hadn't even written today, and I was not going to let her win the bet. No way.

"No...this isn't some silly bet," she said.

"Hey, why is it silly?" I asked, faking an insulted look. She hit my upper arm gently and laughed at me.

"Okay, okay...what deal then?" Her expression was thoughtful. This seemed to be somewhere serious.

"Let's live life to the fullest, starting on this trip. We will try new things, have new experiences, and make tons of memories. We will really start living..." I took in her words. I was going to make her feel like she was living. Maybe it was actually time that she started living, like a girl her age should. Or, a woman her age. I had to stop seeing her as a little girl. She clearly wasn't. That body proved it way too good.

Oh no, don't think about that! Her head was in my lap, I couldn't start thinking like that. Or else she would start noticing very soon.

"Okay. Let's do it." She nodded, closing her eyes again, as if she had known I would agree. Maybe she had...she knew me better than anyone.

"Good..." She looked so innocent at that point, I couldn't help but lean down and place my lips to her forehead. Even though I really wanted to kiss her lips and not her forehead, I was happy with this. For now. Right now, she didn't need her best friend in love with her. Right now, she needed to get over Matt, because he wasn't worthy of her. Nowhere near.

"I promise you, Elena. We will have tons of new experiences, while we are here. I will make sure your life is full, always."

She smiled up at me, her doe eyes bright. God, I loved those eyes.

"I know you will, Damon." She sat up then, stretching out her body, while yawning slightly. I imagined that body stretching out beneath my body, her beautiful brown hair spread on the white pillow, and her hands grabbing the sheets...

"Well, I think I am just about done here... You wanna head back now?" I nodded, a bit sad our time at the beach was done. We were getting closer to each other, even though I wasn't sure that was possible.

"Sure, if you want," I said and helped her gather our things. Even though I really wanted to stay with her, she was the one needing this.

We started back the way we came, and again I took Elena's hand. We had our shoes in one hand and each others in the other. If someone had seen us, they would have probably thought that we were dating. Just like the airport.

And that was what I wanted. I wanted to be in a relationship with her. I had never thought that day would come. Damon Salvatore, in a committed relationship? That had never happened before, but it was going to. I wasn't going to let her go.

We passed a life guard stand on the way up, and I couldn't help but notice the sign on it. I stopped walking and Elena looked at me confused. Smiling, I glanced at her.

"Hey...about that living to the fullest thing..."

"Yeah?" she questioned, her eyes narrowing suspiciously. I motioned to the sign in front of us.

"Let's start it tomorrow." She saw what I was pointing at. The sign read, in big letters: SURF LESSONS: $50/person. 9 am-10 am 12 pm-1 pm 3 pm-4 pm. Elena raised a brow at the sign.

"Surfing...you want to learn how to surf?"

I smiled innocently.

"Nope, not me, us."

"Us?" she questioned. I nodded.

"Yep, you and me." She shook her head at my request and started walking. But our hands were still holding each other, and I pulled her back to me.

"Damon, I am clumsy enough walking on solid ground, how do you really expect me to survive standing on a piece of wood as it cuts through high water?" she asked, anxiety showing in her eyes. She didn't have to be afraid.

"Ah ah ah," I cautioned, "no hating on the surf lessons. You wanted a new experience, and you wanted some fun, some adventure, well...we gotta start somewhere."

She contemplated this.

"Yeah...but surfing? Really?" I kissed her head, and pulled her along as I began walking.

"Yes. We'll do it tomorrow, and no complaining." She rolled her eyes, but smiled a little, so I knew I had won. It was perfect, really...and anything to let me see her back in this bikini.

* * *

When we got back to the house, Caroline and Matt were in their room, doing things that neither me nor Elena wanted to know anything about. Elena blushed when the sound of moaning reached her ears, and quickly disappeared into the kitchen. I laughed, put our stuff down in the big living room and followed her to the kitchen.

"I am not leaving you alone in a kitchen, since that time you started a fire," I said, raising an eyebrow. She turned and looked at me. She had never looked at me like that before. She still hadn't put on the dress, and her body was pulling me towards her. God, how I wanted to kiss her senseless, right there. But this wasn't the time. She needed time, to adjust to all of this, and to get over Matt. But it would happen. Sooner rather than later. I had no idea how I was going to tackle my new found love for her. It had been there, for a very long time. But I had never noticed it, until now.

"Urgh, are you never going to let that go? It was once and I was thirteen! And pancakes are hard to make," she said, trying not to laugh at the memory.

"To answer your question, no, I am never going to let that go. But I will teach you how to make pancakes. We should be having the ingredients here, so put on an apron," I said and started looking in the fridge. She laughed and put on an apron, handing one to me. But when I saw her, wearing that apron and nothing but her bikini underneath, I stopped dead in my tracks.

Holy shit. This was getting a bit too close to one of my fantasies. A fantasy that I wouldn't mind sharing with Elena. Not at all.

It looked like she was wearing absolutely nothing but the apron, and the look in her eyes, almost seemed to look like she wanted me to kiss her. And God, I wanted to kiss her. Hell, I wanted to do a lot more than to just kiss her. I wouldn't mind taking her right on the kitchen counter...

What the hell was I thinking? This was Elena! My best friend. The most innocent girl I have ever known, and now I'm fantasizing about her and me on the kitchen counter?

"Damon?" she asked, suddenly looking very nervous. I snapped out of it, and put on a smile. Hoping that my arousal wasn't too noticeable in my shorts, I put on the apron she gave me, and started mixing the batter, explaining what I was doing. The best part of the cooking, was that while she was focused on the food, while I was focused on her. She looked beautiful when she tried understanding this. She didn't really need to learn how to cook. I had made it very clear, that I would always be here to cook for her. Always. But she still wanted to learn. And I could get used to her in an apron. Some day, she would be wearing nothing but that apron.

* * *

**So, that was it! PLEASE leave a review. I really really mean it. Reviews makes my day, and it gives me the greatest inspiration! **

**Chapter 8, everybody. Hope you liked it. If you did, leave a review telling me why. If you hated it, leave a review telling me why. See you!**


	9. Chapter 9

**I have NEVER struggled so much with a chapter, as with this one. Oh my God! This was really tough to write, and I would've never been able to finish it, without the help of Kasy (Foreverfirstloves). I owe you SO big! Thank you! **

**That being said, this is my third chapter within 48 hours! I have no idea how, but the inspiration is great, and it just keeps flowing. I hope you all enjoy this chapter! **

**Oh, and remember, this is an M rated story, and that is for a reason. I am now warning you of light smut in this chapter, so if you don't want to read that... Well, consider yourselves warned!**

* * *

**Chapter 9: Elena**

The rest of the night was extremely relaxing. After our trip to the beach, Damon and I made a mess of the kitchen, as he tried to teach me how to make pancakes. It had taken forever to clean, but we had had so much fun, we didn't really mind.

During that time, neither Damon nor I had considered changing into normal clothes, instead of our swimming suits. Okay, I might have thought about it once or twice, but Damon kept staring at me, and something told me that he liked what he saw...and a girl's gotta take what she can get!

There was also the fact that to change, I'd have to walk past Matt and Caroline's room, and I really didn't want to get closer to the loud moans and bumps coming from behind their door. I mean, the thought of them having sex was bad enough. I didn't need to hear the soundtrack as well.

So, taking that into account, I decided that I was quiet content in my bathing suit/apron outfit, with Damon in the kitchen, making pancakes.

"See, you can make food, without burning down the kitchen!" Damon teased, as we sat at the island in the kitchen, and ate the pancakes.

"I know! I have actually managed to cook things, other than pancakes, in the past," I defended, trying not to blush too much.

"Oh, you must mean the coffee and cereal breakfast you had, when I couldn't cook for you on campus?" He raised a brow, "how could I forget that? You're right, your skills surpass us all!"

I smiled, but hated to admit that he was right. I didn't know a single thing about cooking. We lived together on campus, and he cooked for me every morning and evening.

However, on the days he was gone, out partying or drinking, or whatever it was that Damon did, when he wasn't with me, I was forced to fend for myself.

But coffee and cereal were probably at the top of the list of things I made best. Maybe even the only things.

"I happen to like coffee and cereal very much," I said, picking up a pancake.

He smirked, but didn't comment. Instead he motioned towards the food, encouraging me to taste it.

I moaned as I took the first bite, wondering how on earth Damon was so talented in a kitchen. Oh, right, Italian family. And he had gotten a lot of practice, when he had cooked for me on campus. He really was perfect.

"I'll take that as a compliment," he said smugly, eating one as well.  
I smiled at him, then reached over for the syrup he had set out.

I coated my pancake with the sugary goodness, then squeezed some onto what remained of Damon's.

He frowned at the pancake, and then looked at me.

Smiling innocently, I raised the syrup bottle and squeezed, causing it to cover his nose and mouth.

Damon jumped back, "Oh no, you did not!"

He grabbed another syrup container, and I barely had time to wonder why we had different types of syrup before he started running after me.

I squeaked and ran to the backyard, trying to reach the pool before he got me.

No luck!

I felt his hand lock on my wrist, just before I reached the edge.

Then I felt the sticky feeling of the syrup being poured into my hair.

I screamed, laughing, as it ran down my face and onto my body.

"Enough, Enough!" I pleaded, but Damon was relentless!

He began to move hands everywhere, spreading the syrup all over me.

It stuck to my face, my sides, my hair, and there was no escaping.

I squirmed and squirmed, but he continued to coat my body with the syrup.

But suddenly, Damon's hand cupped my breast, and both of us stopped dead in our tracks, looking at each other.

The hand was quickly removed and a small pink color spread across Damon's cheeks. Wait, pink color? Was he blushing?

"Uhm... Sorry, uh... It wasn't on purpose..." he said, looking at the ground.

I laughed and pulled him in for a hug.

He had syrup everywhere, but he didn't seem to care. We were both covered in it now anyway. His arms wrapped around my body and pulled me closer. I put my arms around his neck and looked into his beautiful blue eyes. I wasn't focusing on anything other than him. His eyes were locked at mine, and slowly, he leaned his head down towards me, making my heart speed up like hell.

Was I getting my first kiss, all covered in syrup, in the arms of my best friend?

But then he stopped, and pulled away again.

Before I could comment, or react in any way, I felt my body tip, and we were both in the water of the pool. Damon's arms slipped from me, and I gasped for air, laughing as I surfaced.

I used the water, then, to clean off my face.

"I thought you'd appreciate a shower!" Damon said, laughing, while he swam closer. I chuckled with him, but on the inside I was a disappointed.

I had been so sure he was going to kiss me. But then he didn't.

I shook my head.

No need to let my doubts spoil the night!

"Yeah, you're right," I told him, "But I think a real shower would be better. You know, with warm water!"

He nodded, "Probably right...come on, let's go back inside."

I agreed, and followed him out of the pool.

* * *

After both took a shower, separately, we joined Caroline and Matt in the living room, where Matt had found a big screen TV. Apparently it had been hidden in one of the walls, only coming forth if you pressed a button on a remote.

The happy couple were completely wrapped up in each other and didn't really seem to care about anything else. Maybe Matt had finally found the one?

I looked at them, jealous of their relationship, while I hugged the pillow, in my lap, tighter.

Then I returned my gaze to the screen, trying to ignore them.

But still, I couldn't help but want what they had...or at least, something like that, with Damon.

I would love to lie between his legs, his arms wrapped around me and his lips trailing butterfly kisses on my neck.

But no. Damon was sitting in one of the chairs, and I was sitting in another. Far away from each other.

"You jealous?" Damon's voice ripped me from my thoughts. I blushed a bit and shot him a look.

"Of what? Why would I be jealous?" I asked, trying to sound like it didn't matter.

But it did.

I was more in love with Damon that I had ever been, and this day had been one of the toughest in all of my life. We had been close to each other all day, in a different way than we usually were. There had been something more...but it seemed like I was the only one who cared.

Damon smirked at me, as if he knew something he wasn't supposed to know and shrugged. I hugged the pillow closer to my body and tried to ignore him.

He couldn't possibly know. No way. I had been in love with him all of my life. What were the odds, that he was going to figure that out, right in this moment? No, of course he didn't know anything. He had always been completely oblivious to my feelings.

And if Caroline's plan didn't work, he'd probably remain oblivious for the rest of his life!

A small snore disturbed my thoughts, and I looked at Caroline and Matt.

They were sleeping. I smiled at them and turned back to the television. I didn't want to be jealous.

I heard Damon get up then, and looked at him, silently asking him what he was doing.

He just gave me his usual smirk and motioned for me to get up. I frowned but followed his request. What did he have in mind?

He sat down in the chair I had just been occupying, and grabbed my waist, pulling me down on his lap.

His arms wrapped around my upper body, as I tried to find a comfortable position.

I ended up having my head on his chest and my feet strutting off the armrest of the chair.

His arms felt like a protective shield, as he held me, and his fingers were slowly playing with my hair. I smiled against his neck.

Now this was more like what I had in mind.

It didn't take long for me to fall asleep like this. It had been a very long day, and a lot of things had happened. And as always, the sound of Damon's heart beat calmed me down.

* * *

Moments later, I heard his voice. "Elena?"

I groaned and opened my eyes, only to find myself looking into Damon's beautiful blue ones. I was still in his lap and he was still holding me close to his body.

"You ready to go to bed?" he asked. I frowned and looked around. How long had I been out? I had only closed my eyes for a second! He smiled as I yawned as response.

Then I felt him lift me, and I whined.

"Damon, you can't be lifting me! I weigh a ton, you're going to ruin your back!" I said, desperately trying to get out of his arms.

Not that I love him holding me, but I'd ruin his body if he carried me all the way to the room, and that would be a terrible shame.

He laughed and tightened his grip around me, as he started moving up the stairs. I started pouting, trying to show him how unsatisfied his decision made me, but he didn't stop. He kept going, until we reached our room. Then he opened the door, walked inside and put me down on the soft bed.

"I didn't want you down there. Caroline and Matt might hear. But here..."

His eye's darkened.

I swallowed, "Damon...what is it?"

"I...I just want to-"

He trailed off, taking a step toward me.

The I was in his arms again, and his lips went to my neck, pressing kisses against my skin.

My eyes widened. What was he doing? He couldn't possibly know.

"I need to do this," he whispered against my cheek, "I need to be with you like this."

I swooned, and he pulled away, looking into my eyes, "Are you ready for your first kiss, Lena?"

As he asked this, one of his hands caressed the side of my face.

I didn't know what to say. I was still in shock.

But then his lips were against mine. I had never felt anything like it.

Fireworks were shooting from my lips, and when he gently licked my lower lip with his tongue, I couldn't help but let out a noise that didn't sound like me at all.

It sounded like an animal.

His hands were absolutely everywhere, then, pulling my clothes off, caressing my skin, and holding me in place.

My whole body was on fire. And he hadn't done anything but touch my skin.

We were just kissing, and he was caressing my body. But it felt like so much more.

He broke off the kiss and looked into my eyes. There was something different about his. They were darkened, and seemed to get even darker. I frowned and put my hand on his cheek, gently caressing it. He leaned into my touch and closed his eyes, while opening his mouth slightly. I smiled at him, as he opened his eyes again and captured my mouth once more.

His tongue slipped past my lips, and started slowly playing with my own.

I moaned again, wrapping my arms around his back. Why was he still wearing his shirt, if I couldn't have mine on?

I tugged at it, and he helped me get it off, only breaking the kiss for a swift second. His lips were everywhere. My jaw line, my neck, my chest, my stomach, my arm...

Then...

"What the hell is this, Lena?!" he had suddenly stopped and I felt him grip my wrist, turning my arm.

Oh, shit.

"Uhm... It's nothing," I said, trying to get my arm away from his grip. It didn't work. Not at all.

He kept holding on to it, and he was looking at me with rage in his eyes. Oh God, oh God... This could _not _be happening now. This wasn't how I wanted my first time to be.

"You planned on keeping this a secret? I thought we told each other everything!"

"I...we do...I just-"

I didn't know what to say, and he was shaking his head.

"Elena, I don't think I can't be friends with someone who harms them self. I'm too good for someone like that...someone like you."

I blinked back tears as he got off the bed.

"God, I can't believe I was so stupid! And for so long..." he shot me a short disgusted look.

I shook my head, "So, you're just going to leave me? Because of my scars?"

My voice was quieter than I wanted it to be, but my heart was breaking, "Fifteen years of friendship means nothing to you?"

I stood up from the bed.

He raised an eyebrow at me, then moved, beginning to grab his things from around the room. I had no idea what I should say. I wanted to hug him, to feel his arms, for him to tell me that everything would be alright.

"Of course. I can't be friends with someone like you, Elena. Did you honestly think I would ever want someone like you?"

* * *

I woke up with a gasp and sat up. I was still in the living room, and I was still in Damon's lap. And he was awake, looking worried at me. Oh God, it had only been a dream! I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer to me.

"You okay, Lena? Did you have a nightmare?" he asked, while he lifted me up.

My heart was still pounding after his hard words, and I was on the edge to crying, but it didn't matter. It was all just a dream, and there was no way he was going to see my scars. He hadn't seen them yet. Why would he notice them now?

"Just... Can we go to bed?" I asked quietly, ignoring his question. I really didn't want to talk to him about the dream. The first part had been amazing. I had enjoyed his hands on my body way too much. His kisses had been hot, and I couldn't help but wonder if it would feel the same in real life.

But the second part had been terrible. No, more than terrible. Horrific. It had almost erased ever single memory of what happened before.

He nodded, smiling at me as he moved to carry me upstairs.

No, I wasn't going to tell him about the dream.

For some odd reason, I didn't like the idea of him knowing what had happened.

Because that fear, showing in the dream, was a reality. Every single day, I was afraid that he was going to say something like that. That I wasn't good enough for him, and I never would be. But I had to remember it was just a dream.

"Are you going to tell me about your nightmare?" he asked and sat me down, when we got in our room.

I shrugged to avoid answering, and walked into the bathroom, to do the usual evening routine. I took off everything but my underwear, brushed my teeth, combed my hair, and then I remembered that I didn't have anything but the gown Caroline had bought, and I really wasn't feeling it tonight.

I didn't have my sweatshirts or anything like that, either, though.

Maybe Damon would lend me something...

I got an idea, which my comfort zone immediately shunned away from.

But I reminded myself to be brave, be bold, because if I didn't, then I was forced to be that girl in the dream...scared and fragile, waiting for rejection...and this trip was all about change.

I could do this! I had to do this.

"Damon?" I called, emerging from the bathroom in just my underwear, "Can I borrow one of your T-shirts to sleep in?"

Damon was sitting on one of the chairs in our room, writing in his journal. I smiled a bit as I remembered our bet. No way he was going to keep it up during the whole vacation.

I felt way too self-conscious in the lingerie. Caroline had insisted I got something, and how do you tell Caroline no? Exactly, you don't.

Besides, this was part of my "being bold" movement. I just had to do this.

"Sure," he reached over and picked something up from a pile he had near the bed, "You can wear this one..."

He looked at me, like really looked at me, and I saw the way the muscles in his jaw tighten. The journal was put on the night stand, without him taking his eyes off me.

I blushed slightly, as I walked to him and grabbed the black shirt he was holding.

Noticing that his eyes still didn't leave my body, I put the shirt on and took off my bra underneath.

I threw it in my bag and sat on the bed, ready to go to sleep. Somehow, I didn't feel insecure that I was going to be next to Damon, only wearing his shirt and panties. Or at least not that insecure.

"Are you... Uh, are you okay with me sleeping next to you? Or should I go down stairs to the couch?" Damon asked, still looking at me weird.

I had never seen him looking at me like that. On the other hand, he'd never seen me in his clothes like this before. Part of me wanted to giggle at how off balanced he seemed. Was this the eternal ladies man, Damon Salvatore? Put out of his game, by his best friend?

"Come on, Damon. You know I sleep better with you by my side," I said and reached out for him, motioning for him to join me.

"Sure, uh... Two minutes, I'll just have to get ready first. Just... Uh, go to sleep. I'll be back soon," he said hurriedly, then walked to the bathroom.

When he shut the door, I heard him click the lock, and frowned a bit.

But then I got under the covers and waited for him to join me. I couldn't keep my self from smiling and giggling like a little girl.

A few moments later, he emerged from the bathroom, only wearing his boxers. Even though I had seen his torso so many times, it didn't change the way it made me feel.

He threw his clothes next to his bag, and then he got in next to me.

I turned against him and placed my head on his chest, waiting for his arms to wrap around me. And when they did, I let out a content sigh and draped my arm over his stomach.

I enjoyed the feeling of his skin touching mine. And oh God, those abs.

"Are you going to tell me about your nightmare?" he asked again, as he played with my hair. I bit my lip and shifted, so that I was able to look into his eyes.

"Do you really want to hear it?" I asked, trying to avoid his gaze. He nodded and held me even closer. I sighed and closed my eyes.

Be brave. Trust him.

"You were rejecting me," I started, clearing my throat, so my voice was stronger, "You were saying that I wasn't good enough for you, and that you could never be friends with someone like me."

I didn't see his reaction, as I kept my eyes firmly shut.

I didn't want to cry.

Not again.

"Why would you dream such a thing? Lena, I promise you, I'll never leave you. Remember the necklace? That's my promise to you. I won't ever leave you. You are good enough. Hell, you're more than that. You're way too good for me," he said and pressed his lips to my forehead. I sighed and placed my head on his chest again, trying to hold back my tears. I wanted to explain everything to him. Tell him about my fears of losing him, about my insecurity and how I wanted him to my first kiss, my first time, my first everything.

But I couldn't tell him that.

"Thanks, Damon... It really means a lot," I said, as I felt him tighten the grip around me even more. It felt right. I belonged here, in his arms. Oh, how I wish I could stay there forever.

"Always, Lena. Oh, and by the way..."

I lifted my head and turned it towards him, looking at him. He was smirking and looked down at my body.

"You look hot in my shirt."

Then he closed his eyes and laid down, as if nothing at all had happened. I blushed slightly and laid my head down on his chest once again.

"I like wearing it," I mumbled, before falling asleep again. This time there weren't any bad dreams.

* * *

**So, chapter 9 folkes! As always, pleeeeeease review! I know I'm begging you all the time, but I really want your reviews! If you have any ideas, any suggestions or things you would like to see in this fic, PLEASE add it to your review! It helps me so much. **

**I hope you all enjoyed it, and will be pleased to hear that I am already working on chapter 10. I know I also have a lot of other fics that I should update, but this is just taking up all of my time! I have to take care of my music as well! **

**So guys, please leave a review, and have a GREAT day! It's Friday tomorrow, wuhu! **


	10. Chapter 10

**Okay, so this chapter got a LOT longer than I had imagined. That's why I'm maybe doing the next chapter in Damon's pov as well. I hope you guys don't mind too much, but there's stuff I need to fit into the pov's, and I can't just write a filler. **

**So, I hope you like this! I'm sorry for not updating for so long. For some odd reason, I can't write during the weekend, but I have no problems writing during the normal days. Weird, huh? Soo, here you have it. Chapter 10!**

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**Chapter 10: Damon**

When I woke up, the first thing I did, was to groan. God, I was tired, and it was way too early to be awake. What had woken me up at this ungodly hour?

Slowly I opened my eyes, looking around the room. The sun were shining through the window, lightening the white room. I was laying in the California king bed, that was placed on the opposite site of the bathroom door. The windows were on my right side, the curtains opened. Right, we forgot to close them yesterday.

On the right side of the bathroom door stood a desk, with a lamp and Elena's journal. Both of our suitcases were on the floor, mine wide open, looking messy, and hers closed, looking neat as fuck. But where was she?

We had fallen asleep together the night before. I had held her, just the way I loved to do. She had been having nightmares...

"Elena?" I asked and sat up in the bed, driving one hand through my hair. There were no sign of her anywhere. She had to be in the bathroom or downstairs.

I reached over the bed and looked at the digital watch on the bed table. 8.30. What the hell was she doing up? Elena loved sleeping, just as much as I did. No way she had just woken up.

"Elena?" I asked again. Still no answer.

Just as I was about to stand up from the bed, to go look for her, the bathroom door opened and Elena stepped out. Only wearing my shirt and panties. Blue lacy panties. I felt my erection clearly and tried to hide it by raising my knees just a bit.

She blushed a bit and slowly started to walk towards the bed, her hair hanging in front of her beautiful face. Thoughts of what should have happened last night, and thoughts of what I wanted to do to her now was popping into my head, making my arousal very uncomfortable.

God, how I wanted to pull her down the bed, place kisses all over her beautiful face and make love to her, until she was screaming my name.

I got pulled out of my thoughts as Elena returned to the bed, going under the covers. She laid her head down on the pillow, looking at me with a small smile.

_Come on, Damon, get your head in the game. This is Elena, for Christ's sake._

"You're up way too early," I said and laid down, still trying to hide my way too obvious erection. The last time I had scared the life out of her. I didn't want to do that to her again. I needed to take it slow. As she spoke, I tried to think of something that would make me calm down a bit. Anything, my grandmother or something like that.

"I woke up and needed to go to the bathroom. Sorry if I woke you up," she said, looking down at my chest, instead of into my eyes. I raised one eyebrow at her trying to find out what she was thinking. I hadn't seen that look in her eyes before. There had been a lot of looks lately, that I had never seen on Elena' beautiful face before. She was really changing.

"You didn't. I think. I just woke up and missed you," I said, sending her my charming smirk, before pulling her into my arms. My erection had almost gone completely down, but it all came back, as she sighed and put her head on my chest. How could such a small gesture turn me on, like it did? I needed her. Way too much.

How long had it been, since I last had sex? A week maybe? How could I already be this crazy about getting laid. And with Elena? I had always been able to control that kind of things. But Elena made it completely impossible.

"Well, if you want to sleep on, do that. It's still early," I said as I started stroking her hair. We were used to laying like this, and my body reacted on it's own.

"On one hand, I really want to sleep more. But on the other hand, I really want to spend time with you," she said, letting out another sigh, as her arm landed on my stomach. I pulled her a little closer and smiled.

"Well, we have three weeks to spend time together. You can sleep if you want," I said, chuckling lightly. I felt her shrug and shift a bit, so she was comfortable.

"You know what I found yesterday, while you were cleaning up after lunch?" she asked, and let her fingers draw small patterns on my stomach. I reacted instantly, and hoped for the love of God, that she wasn't looking. Wonder what those tiny fingers could do to me...

No, she was a virgin! That wasn't a way to be thinking. If I were going to be her first, it was going to be perfect, and she shouldn't feel insecure about anything. I had no problem leading the way. Not at all. As long as she was having the time of her life.

When she shifted again, it reminded me that she probably wanted an answer. What the hell was going on with me?

"No. Do enlighten me," I said, starting to play with her hair. That hair would look wonderful, spread across my pillow, her beneath...

_Stop, Damon! Focus!_

"They have a piano here. I was wondering if... Could you play something for me?" she asked, and I noticed her neck turning red at the request. Why was she afraid of asking me? I had played for her so many times before. There wasn't anything unusual about it.

"Of course. You want to show me where it isn't? I haven't noticed it around," I said, surprised that I had missed a piano. It isn't exactly a small instrument. She sat up, which made me raise my knees instantly again. I didn't want our morning to be ruined by my thoughts. No way. And I hadn't played since we left home.

As she stood up from the bed, she looked at me again, blushing slightly. Of course she didn't want to go downstairs dressed like that. Matt was here, after all. He had to be the only one of us, who hadn't seen her like this before.

"You want to borrow a couple of sweats?" I asked, and raised an eyebrow. I could already figure out that Caroline hadn't allowed her to bring any. I was grateful for that. I really liked seeing her in my clothes.

She nodded and looked at the floor. I let out a small chuckle and tried not to be too obvious about my thoughts. I had to get her out of the room for a minute. As soon as I stood up, it would be obvious. She would see it right away, and then our morning could be ruined.

But how on earth did I ask her to leave, without making it sound like I didn't want to be with her? Or make it sound like I was hiding something. God, when did my life get this complicated?

"I'm just going to the bathroom to.. Uh... Brush my teeth," she said and quickly disappeared out the bathroom. I raised both my eyebrows, surprised by the timing of her sudden urge to brush her teeth. If she only knew...

As soon as the door closed behind her, I stood up and put on a pair of sweats. I didn't want to put on a shirt just yet. Then I found another pair, that would be way too big for Elena, but I didn't have any clothes her size. She was a lot smaller than me.

I had to find a way to get rid of my boner, and soon. It wasn't as obvious in the sweats, but if we got too close, she would feel it instantly. And I really didn't want to ruin this morning. If she wanted me to play piano to her, I would. And I was going to make sure it seemed damn romantic. I couldn't do that with a raging boner! She would be scared.

As she emerged from the bathroom, I handed her the sweats. She took them and put them on, without saying a word. God, she looked cute.

"I'm just gonna go to the bathroom. Promise, I'll be quick," I said, having a sudden idea. It was lame, but I had to do it. Everything for Elena. God, I felt like a teenage boy.

She nodded and sat down on the bed, as I quickly locked my self in the bathroom. It had been years since I had been forced to masturbate of this reason. I had always been able to keep as cool as a cucumber, no matter how hot the girl was. But clearly it wasn't possible with Elena, at all.

I couldn't think of anyone but her, as I got it over with. God, how I wanted it to be her hands, not my own. Or even better, it could be her insides.

* * *

"You ready, Salvatore?" she asked, as I emerged from the bathroom. She was still wearing my shirt and my sweats. I loved seeing her in my clothes. Just like she would do, if she was my girlfriend. And I would make it very clear to every other male person on earth, that she was mine, and she was going to stay mine.

"All ready, Gilbert!" I said, as I extended my arm towards her. I didn't want to point out again how great she looked in my shirt. That would only result in her starting to get the hint.

She laughed and hooked her arm in my elbow. We had been calling each other by our last names for a long while now. None of us really knew where it came from, but it had become a bit of a habit over the years.

She led me down the stairs, down a hallway I hadn't noticed until now, and then down some stairs to a basement. I looked around the room. It was beautiful.

The room was painted all white, same for the wooden floors. In the middle of a room stood a black Steinway piano, on a black carpet. On the other side of the room were a completely white couch, matching the white walls, and next to that a white table with flowers and paper on it. The only black thing in the room, was the beautiful piano. My fingers were itching to play.

Without thinking about Elena, I stepped forward and opened the piano, looking at the beautiful white keys. Slowly I sat down on the chair, letting my finger touch the keys, while my foot found it's place at the pedal.

It felt amazing, playing on a Steinway grand piano. I had never been playing on something so expensive before, and it felt like heaven. I closed my eyes, just letting my fingers dance across the keys, as if I had been playing my whole life.

As I had been playing for a short while, I felt Elena sit down next to me, her body touching me. My body relaxed in a completely new way. I knew that her eyes would be locked at either me or at my fingers. She had always liked when I played for her. She hadn't been sitting next to me before, though. I liked it. It was great, having her close, when I did something that meant a lot to me.

When the piece was finished, I looked at her, and noticed the tears forming in her eyes. I frowned and put my arm around her, for comfort. This was the second time within 24 hours she was crying. She was hiding something, and I wasn't sure I liked it. Was this thing with Matt really that big of a deal to her? Maybe I was wrong, to try and make her chose me instead of him. She deserved everything she wanted. But Matt sure as hell didn't deserve someone as beautiful, as amazing as her. He was great with Blondie.

I didn't him to be the guy that took Elena away from me. Because I knew that would happen some day. She would find her perfect prince charming, and start spending time with him, instead of me. I would loose her. When she would move away with him, away from me. I couldn't bear thinking about it. She had been my best friend throughout my whole life. I didn't want to loose her. Not when I just found out I was having feelings for her.

"What's wrong, Lena? I'm worried about you," I said, gently rubbing her back. Secretly I was hoping that she would tell me everything about her feelings for Matt, and how much it affected her. But I really didn't think she was going to. She hadn't done it yet, so why now? Because everything was becoming too much, when he was this close, all the time?

She leaned into my embrace and placed her head on my chest.

"Nothing's wrong, Damon. It's just.. What you're playing. It's beautiful..." she said, burying her head in my chest, as if she wanted to hide the tears falling from her eyes. To say I was surprised, would be an understatement. She was crying, because what I was playing was beautiful? I had no idea she felt this way about my music.

"Wow... Uh, thanks... I wrote it a couple of weeks before we left," I said, trying to say enlighten the conversation, and maybe stop the tears that were falling from her eyes. I didn't mind that my chest was getting wet, but I did mind that she was feeling sad. I wanted her to be happy. All happy.

She had often been the inspiration for my pieces. She had no clue, because I had never told her anything about it. I was afraid it would be too awkward. Some day I would let her know. Just not today.

"It's amazing, Damon. I wish I had begun at the same time as you. It must be amazing, playing an instrument," she said and looked at the keys with a longing look. I frowned. Did she want to learn how to play? She'd never seemed like she wanted to play music.

"I guess I can try teaching you something? If you want, of course," I said, slowly caressing her back. She still hadn't put on a bra. I could feel her soft breast against my chest, and it was getting me all worked up.

Her eyes lit up, as she looked at me.

"You will? Really?" she asked, sounding really surprised. Hadn't she expected me to want to teach her? What the hell was she thinking of me?

"Of course, Lena. Why wouldn't I? If you want to learn, I'll teach you. I promise," I said, trying to distance my self a bit. I had taken care of my problem in the bathroom, but when it came to Elena, I couldn't seem to get enough.

"Thank you," she said, frowning when I removed my arms and moved a bit away from her. When I looked into her eyes, I saw the quick flash of hurt, before it was gone and replaced by happiness. She wanted to be close to me?

"No problem. Not at all. You want to start now, or should we go upstairs and start making breakfast?" I asked, smiling at her. I couldn't wait to teach her both to play piano and to cook. It had been fun, making pancakes. And she had looked cute with flour on her face.

"Breakfast sounds good. I can make pancakes," she said and smirked at me. I laughed and stood up from the bench. I extended my hand to her, and she accepted it, as I helped her up.

"I was thinking that I could teach you to make eggs today, Miss Gilbert," I said as I tucked her arm around my elbow. She leaned a bit into me, letting me feel her body once again.

_Focus, Damon. On something else than her! _

"That sounds delightful, Mr. Salvatore," she said, as I started walking up the stairs from the beautiful room. Something told me that I would be spending a lot of time down there, preferable with Elena as well. Who knows, maybe our first kiss could be down here. If she would allow me to kiss her of course.

* * *

Elena does not belong in a kitchen. That was very clear to me, after spending almost an hour, teaching her how to crack eggs, without getting shells in the mixture. She didn't succeed, but she didn't seem to be taking it too hard either. Actually, she was laughing her ass off, and I loved seeing her this happy.

"Just whisk it around, like this," I said and showed her how to mix eggs, milk, salt and pepper. She tried her best to follow my lead, but she really didn't succeed at all. Instead she got eggs all over her apron and the kitchen counter. Hell, she even had eggs in her hair and on her nose. How the hell do you get egg in the face, from whisking it?!

"I'm just not suited to be in a kitchen, Damon. I'm a failure of a woman," she said and giggled, as I grabbed her arm, to show her how to do it.

"No, Lena, it's fine! Now, just relax in your wrist. Don't get all tense," I said, as I tried repeating my own motions on her body. Once again, we were painfully close. She hadn't changed her clothes, still wearing my shirt and my sweatpants. Just like she would do, if we were dating. She must be one of those girls that always wear their boyfriends clothes. And I wouldn't mind her wearing mine a bit more often. She looked downright hot in them.

She made a sudden movement with her hand, which resulted in eggs on my cheek. She giggled and reached out to remove it. Her small hand seemed to caress my cheek, as she removed it. Her had lingered at my cheek, as she looked into my eyes. God, I loved her eyes. And she looked happy. I loved seeing her like this.

I couldn't help it.

I started to slowly lean in, not thinking about my actions at all. As I got closer, I felt the pulse in her thumb on my cheek speed up, which made me wake up. I couldn't kiss her here! With both of us covered in eggs. No way.

I pulled away and grabbed her small hand. It felt warm in mine. I still wasn't wearing a shirt, even though it wasn't cold at all. Actually, I was feeling kind of hot. But she seemed to be even warmer than me.

"Are you sick?" I asked concerned and put wrist on her forehead. She didn't seem fever warm, but she was a lot warmer than me. She shrugged and looked at me with a small sparkle in her eyes.

"I'm just kind of hot," she said, biting her lower lip.

_Damn right, you are... No! Focus, Damon, think of something else. Anything but her. _

I smiled at her, trying to be somewhere near cool and comfortable. She didn't make this easy for me. Not at all. I felt like a goddamn teenage boy, unable to control his desire. I had been able to control my lust around naked girls, then why couldn't I control it around Elena? She was a virgin for God's sake, and she didn't try to seduce me in any way. How did she affect me in this way?

"Well, you should be. You're wearing a lot of clothes. Loose the pants if you want to," I said, trying to sound casual, and not like I was getting worked up over her. She couldn't know.

"Nah. I'm good," she said, and shrugged, while she removed her hand from mine. I smiled at her and looked at the two bowls. One was full of eggs, and the other one was emptied out on the floor, and partly on our feet.

"So, the eggs didn't go as planned. Let's just do this one bowl. If you're more hungry, we can mix another one," I said and started to warm up the **stegepande**. She hopped up on the counter and looked at me, as I poured the egg mix on, and started focusing on my cooking. I wanted her eggs to be great.

"I told you I have no idea how to cook," she said and shrugged, while watching me. I gave her a brief smile, before returning to my work.

"That's why I'm trying to teach you," I said and laughed. For some odd reason she didn't seem to think she would be able to learn it.

"Yeah, trying being the keyword there. Good I always have you to cook for me," she said. I smiled at the thought of us being an old couple, married for at least 50 years. Then I would always be there to cook for her.

Wait, marriage? What the hell was going on with my head? I didn't want to get married. Never in life was I going to bind me to another person like that. Way too permanent. Then why had I just been smiling at a future, of Elena and I being married?

This was going way too fast for my head to follow my feelings. I knew I had some kind of attachment to her, but wanting to get married to her? I'm Damon Salvatore for Christ's sake! I don't get married. The eternal stud!

But this told me that I actually wanted to get married. But only to Elena. I couldn't imagine my self being with someone else. No way.

How the hell had this happen? And so quick? 48 hours ago, Elena had just been my best friend. Now I wanted to marry her? This made no sense at all. But maybe I just had to accept the fact that I was having some major feelings for her. I did have a plan with our trip.

My smile faded, when I remembered what I had found out about Elena's feelings. For Matt. I felt jealous. A lot. Those feelings were going to be for me, I was going to make sure of that. I would be a lot better for her. I would gladly have a monogamous relationship with her. And I would do anything to make her happy. Because that was what a normal boyfriend would do. Not to mention the fact, that I had known her since forever. I knew mostly everything about her.

But for me to start charming my way in on her, I had to know exactly what she felt towards Matt. I had no idea how serious she was about it. And this time I couldn't just ask Caroline, 'cause Elena would never tell her about her feelings. Not when Caroline and Matt were seeing each other. No, I had to get this out of Elena. But how on earth was I going to do that? I couldn't just ask her. She would shut me down, like she always did.

"_There's no boy's in my life, Damon. I'm just not interested in dating."_

That had been what she had told me, every single time I had asked about her love life. So this Matt thing had to be somewhere new. She would've told me, if she was in love with someone.

Or maybe she wouldn't. She didn't tell me now. Maybe I didn't really know my best friend that well, after all.

"Lena?" I said, feeling slightly insecure. I knew that this probably wouldn't get me anywhere, but I had to at least try. I just had to.

"Yeah?" she said, suddenly looking caring and worried. God, that girl was too good for her self. She was worrying about me, when I was about to ask her something, that could change our relationship a lot. Hopefully it wouldn't change too much, just yet. I wasn't ready to let go of our friendship yet, to go for the happy ever after with her.

"You would tell me, if you started seeing someone, right?" I asked, feeling way too vulnerable for my liking. That wasn't exactly how I wanted to phrase the sentence, but it was out, and there was nothing I could do about it.

She frowned and cocked her head, as she looked at me, very searching.

"If it was serious, then yes... I wouldn't keep stuff like that from you. I'm not going to sit and talk about hot guys with you, if that's what you mean... I prefer to do that with girls that also likes boys... I'm pretty sure you're not playing for your own team," she said, blushing as she kept on going on about how she didn't think I was gay. Well, at least that was out of the way. She couldn't possibly think I was gay. She had witness almost every girl I had brought home.

"So, there is a guy?" I asked, raising an eyebrow at her. Her head turned even more red, as she jumped down from the counter and started washing the bowl we had used for eggs.

"I really don't want to talk to you about this, Damon. And I'm not going to," she said, keeping her eyes at the bowl. I sighed and looked at the food I was cooking. I didn't want it to burn. At least I would keep a bit of my dignity.

"So, there is a guy, and I'm not allowed to know who he is." I was stating a fact, not asking a question. It was clear as the sun. She was blushing like crazy and her voice were lowered, as if she didn't want me to hear what she was saying. She didn't want to tell me.

I wish I could just tell her that I knew everything about her crush on Matt, and that she should give up. She deserved so much better than the slutty quarterback.

"Please, Damon. Let's not go there," she said. Her voice was trembling. Was she crying again? I frowned and knew I couldn't go check on her, since the eggs would burn if I left them. God damn it. What the hell was going on, and why was no one talking to me about it?

"Fine. I won't. I'm sorry, Lena. I just. You're twenty now. And some day you're going to find some amazing guy and marry him, and leave me..." I hadn't meant for the words to come out of my mouth at all. And I shouldn't have let them slip. This was totally wrong. This would make her feel bad about dating. Just what I needed!

"I would never leave you! Why the hell are you saying that, Damon? How could you ever think I would do that to you? You're my best friend, and you're the most important person in my whole life. I wouldn't know what to do without you," she said, as I felt her hugging me from behind. I sighed and took the eggs off the heat. Then I turned around and hugged her back. It felt amazing to have her in my arm, even if it made me hard, to feel her soft breast against my upper stomach. I just wish she didn't notice how she affected me. I didn't want to scare her off. It would be terrible. I would make her feel how hard she made me, some other day. When I was ready for our friendship to take the next step.

"I don't know why I'm saying that, Lena. I guess I'm just kind of afraid to loose you," I said, deciding that since I was already letting out emotions, it wouldn't hurt to let out some more. Because it was true as hell. I was afraid of loosing her. Some day, she was going to get tired of me, or something like that. She was the only one I had, and I couldn't afford to loose her. Not like this. No way.

"And I'm afraid to loose you, Damon. So forget it. I'm never going to leave you. Never. I promise you, that I'll always be here, just like you promised to be here as well. I'm not going to disappear," she said, looking up at me, her chin firmly pressed to my chest.

I pressed my lips against her forehead and smiled against the soft skin. Someday, I would feel all of that soft skin. I made that promise to my self. And she was going to like it.

"Now, Elena, eat up. You need energy for our surfing lessons!"  
She groaned and pulled away from me, looking at the eggs on the plate. Then she sat down, and started eating, looking at me, as if she was going to die.

"Am I allowed to stay on the beach, looking at you learning how to surf?" I rolled my eyes at her, but didn't answer. It wasn't necessary for her to know that I already knew how to surf. The only reason I was taking the class, was because of her.

Seriously, what the hell was going on with my emotions?

* * *

**So, that was it. I hope you all forgive me for my slow update. And holy f**k, 66 reviews?! I feel goddamn famous! Thank you, everyone! Please make sure that I can reply to your reviews. I feel so bad about not being able to answer properly, because I can't tell you how much your reviews means to me.**

**Please review again, and I hope to see you soon! Chapter 11 is going to be something, just saying! **


	11. Chapter 11

**Okay... I know, I know, it's been way too long! I am SO sorry for the long wait, but when you read chapter 12, I think you'll forgive me, eheh!  
Good thing is that I have chapter 12 ready as well, and I'm almost done with chapter 13. So they will be up probably tomorrow or something like that. Soon, I promise. **

**OH MY FREAKING GOD! You guys, 100 reviews! I can't believe it! It's amazing, I am SO grateful. Anonymous guys, pleeeeeease log in or something! I hate that I can't respond to your reviews! I really want to message back.**

**Thank you everyone, you have no idea what it means to me. So I'll shut up now, and let you read! **

**See you at the bottom!**

* * *

**Chapter 11: Damon**

"Ugh, Damon, I'm not sure I want to do this," Elena said, as we were getting ready for the surfing lessons. We had eaten breakfast (she loved the eggs) and then we had gone upstairs to our room, to fetch our stuff. On our way up, we had heard Caroline and Matt "waking up". Elena had walked very fast past their room, and into our own, where she had started the radio, she had found in the drawer of her nightstand. Her face had been completely red while she had done it.

I rolled my eyes at her and started applying sunscreen to my chest. I really didn't want to get all burned up. The sun was hard, and I was pale. And I had planned to stay on the beach for most of the day, just like yesterday.

"Remember our deal, Lena! Living life at it's fullest, right? You need to do this!" I said, finishing up with the sunscreen. I didn't need too much. I did want to be tan, just like Elena was. She sighed heavily and looked at me.

"I know... Ugh, I just didn't expect you to make me go surfing. I imagined something else," she said, blushing slightly as she gathered her towel and sunscreen. She was wearing another one of those cute sundresses, and I couldn't wait for her to get out of it. I wasn't sure if she was wearing the black bikini today, or if Blondie had made sure she had more than one with. I hoped for the last one, and I hoped it would look just as sexy as the black one.

Oh, who am I kidding. After seeing what was hiding underneath all of her sweatshirts and sweatpants, I knew she would look beautiful and sexy in a garbage bag.

"So, what did you expect?" I asked, standing right behind her. She shivered and turned around. She was standing very close to me, and I was fighting my hardest not to react to her. I had taken care of the problem earlier, but it seemed to be returning, and I didn't want to embarrass myself even more. I just had to focus on something else. Think of something else. Maybe someone else. Someone not as hot as Elena.

"I don't know..." she said, without taking her eyes off mine. I leaned in a bit closer, restraining my self from kissing her. I didn't want to do that just yet. But I did like to get a rise out of her. And I liked that I affected her. Maybe she wasn't that far from being over the douchebag. Already? She couldn't have had strong feelings for him, if she was already falling out of love with him.

"I'm just going to wait downstairs. Come down when you're ready," she said, moving past me, while she kept her eyes on the floor. I sighed and let her go. I had to remember that she wasn't just any girl. I wouldn't just kiss her, bang her and leave her. I had to get my self under control. I couldn't move too fast with her. No way. Maybe she would be hurt, and I wouldn't be the one to hurt her. Not after everything she had done for me.

I turned off the music, pleased to hear that Caroline and Matt where done in the other room. They were probably downstairs, talking to Elena. And she would be embarrassed as hell, if I knew her. And I did.

Before I left our room to go downstairs, I checked that we had everything. Money, check, sunscreen, check, towels, check, sunglasses, check, water, check, strawberries, check, champagne and glasses, check and...

My eyes fell on her nightstand where her diary was laying. It would be easy to just open it and get my thoughts on her feelings confirmed. I would know what to do, if I read it. And she wouldn't be mad in the long run. Of course she wouldn't. Not when I helped her realise that she shouldn't be with someone as stupid as Matt.

I sat down on her side of the bed, and grabbed the small book. She used it a lot, and I knew that it would be in the back of the book. Just one small look...

"Damon, are you coming?" I heard Elena yell from downstairs. I threw the book back on the nightstand. What the hell had I been doing? I had been a few seconds away from reading my best friends most private thoughts. Some best friend I was, huh.

Before I could think anymore about it, I grabbed the bag with our stuff and walked out the door. I needed to get away from the temptation that was her diary, and get down to the real temptation, that was her.

When I walked into the kitchen, I was a bit surprised to see Matt's arms around Elena, while he held her close. The anger rose in me, at the sight of them. They didn't belong together at all. That was clear as the sun. They looked wrong together.

And where the hell was Caroline? Wasn't Matt supposed to be all over her? Not_ my _Elena. Noway. But what the hell could I do about this?

Wait, my Elena? I was seeing her as mine? God, I was falling way too hard for this girl.

"You ready to go?" I spat, even though I tried to keep my voice calm. I needed to sound like I didn't care. Instead I sounded like I cared way too much. She was beating me at my own game, and I hated it.

"Yeah, I'm ready. We're going out surfing," Elena said, not taking her eyes off Matt. My rage kept rising. What the hell did he think he was doing? Couldn't he just let her go. She needed to be in my arms, not his.

"That sounds like fun. Caroline and I were thinking of driving to one of the closer cities and look around. When you're done at the beach, call us if you wanna have lunch. Or just eat by yourself. You decide," he said, and finally let go of her. About fucking time. Feeling possessive, I quickly wrapped my arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer to my body. She frowned and looked at me, but didn't ask.

"See you later," she said, as we turned to walk out the door. As soon as we were outside, and were crossing the street, I was able to relax and just enjoy holding her. I was going to have her all to my self for some time, before the lessons. Maybe she would want to go in the water with me again. Actually, I wasn't going to give her a choice.

"So, what was up with that?" she asked, as we got near the beach. I shrugged and searched for a spot to put down our things. She had no idea what was coming. The clock said 11, and the surfing lessons started at 12. We had a full hour before I would have to share her attention with someone else.

"Seriously, Damon. It's just Matt. What happened?" she asked and got out of my embrace. I rolled my eyes, threw our stuff on the beach and lifted her in my arms. She weighed absolutely nothing. Almost feather light.

"Damon, what are you doing?" she asked, and frowned when I took off her sunglasses and threw them in the sand. She was still wearing her dress, but I didn't care. It would be okay.

I smiled at her, and then started running towards the water, her safely in my arms. She shrieked, as she found out what I was doing, but I didn't care. She was going in!

As I got out to where the water hit my abdomen, I threw her in. She screamed, before she hit the water and got under. I laughed and swam after her, making sure she was okay. She emerged from the water seconds later, and she looked downright pissed.

"DAMON GIUSEPPE SALVATORE, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?!" she screamed. I laughed and moved closer to her, having way too much fun about her mood. I knew she wasn't actually mad at me, which made it fun.

"I was throwing you in the water. And something told me that you weren't prepared for it," I said, and looked at her, as I swam closer to her. She looked beautiful in the wet white dress, and her hair were ruffled from the water.

"My dress is all wet now! Damon!" she said and looked down at her self. I smirked, as I spotted her blue bikini under the dress. God, it looked sexy.

I moved, so that I was standing right in front of her, and started taking off her dress. Her eyes went wide and they never left mine. I slowly pulled it upwards, my fingers brushing her perfect olive skin. I felt goosebumps emerge all over her body, as I neared her breast. Not wanting to push her too much, I made sure I didn't touch them at all. But as soon as my fingers were past them, I let them brush against her skin again.

I smiled at her, as the dress came off, and put it over my shoulder. I didn't want it to get lost. It was cute, and I liked it on her.

She blushed and looked down, trying to hide her self. I held her arms away from her body and lifted her head up by her chin.

"Don't hide, Lena. You look great. Now, let's get this dress to the beach again, to let it dry," I said and let go of her, while I started walking back to the beach. As soon as I got to our stuff, I put the dress on a towel and let it dry in the sun, before returning to Elena again. She was swimming around, keeping her head over the surface. God, she looked cute.

I swam quietly behind her, until I grabbed her legs and pulled her underneath the surface. She laughed as she returned to surface, clearly ready to get her revenge.

* * *

After 45 minutes of playing around in the water, both of us went to the beach, ready to get our surfing lessons. Elena didn't put on her dress again, which I was more than grateful for. I loved seeing her like that. If it was up to me, she would be wearing this all the time.

As soon as the surf instructor stepped forwards to call the team together, I regretted my decision to make her go surfing with me. He was our age. Not much older than me, maybe younger, actually. And of course he was what most girl would define as hot.

Don't get my wrong, I have never doubted my self. And I wouldn't doubt my self in this. I attracted a lot more girls than the surfer would. That was clear. But I really didn't need Elena to focus on yet another boy. Matt was enough.

As the surf instructor, Dave, started talking, Elena kept her eyes on him, and focused on his talking. She was wearing her sunglasses, and had did her hair in a messy bun, making her look even better. I hated that her attention was on the surf instructor, and not on me. Well, I would make up for that later. As soon as we got in the water, and she didn't know how to do things, I would be able to help her. I would get to touch her.

Not that stupid instructor. I wouldn't let him touch her. Not when I could be the one doing that. And I would be. Later.

As we grabbed our boards, Elena was already talking with the instructor, seeming a bit too friendly for my taste. I looked at them for a while, before standing next to a blonde woman. She was younger than me. Around 22 or something like that. Older than Elena, but younger than me. She was wearing a bikini, that definitely didn't hide anything, and she had a flirtatious smile on her lips. Normally, I would've flirted with her instantly, probably fucking her somewhere on the beach, but I wasn't going to do that today.

No, I needed to be focusing on Elena. Getting laid wasn't important right now. My feelings for Elena was, and I was never going to go anywhere with her, if I started flirting with another woman. Then she would think I was using her, or something like that. And that wasn't going to happen.

The instructor started teaching, talking about how to stand on a surfboard, in order to keep the balance.

Elena was standing right in front of me, giving me a nice view to her body, while she was trying to get it right. Just as I had imagined, she didn't quiet get it. As I saw an opportunity to help her stand correct and started walking towards her, the instructor already made it there. I felt rage and jealousy rise in my body, at the sight of another man touching her.

"Do you think you could help me? You seem like you know what you're doing," the blonde next to me asked. Her smile was flirting and she was playing with her hair. Definitely the type that didn't care about anything else than sex. There was no way I could get out of that one. I wouldn't be rude to another girl. My mom would be ashamed of me, if she knew that I was treating a woman without respect.

"Sure. Here, stand on the board," I said, helping her keep the balance on the board. I couldn't wait for us to actually get in the water and start surfing. Then I could step in and swoon Elena. Right now I needed to help this blonde woman, who was currently doing anything to get closer to my body. It was getting kind of annoying. Sure, she looked good, but she wasn't what I wanted. She wasn't Elena.

"Ah, okay... Thanks... My name's Olivia," she said and held out her hand. I shook it shortly and muttered my name to her, keeping my eyes on Elena and the instructor. His arms were around her waist, showing her how to get the best balance. This wasn't how it was supposed to be! Not at all! As soon as we were in the water, I was going to do something. I needed to change this, and fast.

Olivia put her hand on my upper arm, pulling me back to reality. I looked at her, listening to whatever she wanted to say to me. Honestly, I couldn't care less.

"How long have you been surfing?" she asked, letting her fingers trace over the skin of my upper arm. I smiled politely back at her, and told her that I had learned it when I was little from my father. It was true, and I knew she didn't care the smallest bit about how long I had been surfing.

"You work out a lot, right?" she asked, still flirting with me. I pulled my arm away from her fingers and nodded, trying not to stare too much at Elena and the instructor.

Sighing, Olivia turned away from me, and looked at the instructor as well. Then she raised an eyebrow and looked at me again.

"So, how long have you been in love with her?" she asked, the flirtatious smile gone and replaced by a knowing one. I raised both my eyebrows and looked at her.

"What do you mean? In love with who?" I asked, pretending I didn't get what she was talking about. Were my feelings so obvious? This girl didn't even know me, and she could see it. Oh, fucking hell.

"It's pretty damn obvious that you're in love with the girl over there. So, for how long? And does she know?" Olivia asked, raising one eyebrow, clearly expecting an answer. I sighed and looked at Elena. The instructor was getting far too close for my liking.

"To be honest, I don't know how long I've been in love with her. I just found out yesterday, but I think I've been for a while. You know, without knowing. And no, she doesn't know. She won't know yet," I said and helped Olivia up on her surfboard, to show her how to do it.

"How long have you known her?" she asked, grabbing my hand, as she lost her balance and almost fell down. I caught her without any trouble and moved her legs into the right position.

"We've been friends ever since she was born. Our parents were best friends," I said, trying not to think too much about our parents. It was a long time ago, and I had cried about it, with Elena. I was over it, but it never got any easier.

"Were? Past tense. What happened?" Olivia asked, frowning. She was now standing on the surf board without any problems.

"Car accident. Both of our parents died, when they went over Wickery Bridge. She was only thirteen back then, and it was really tough on her. It kind of brought us closer together, actually," I said, wondering why I was telling her all of this. Maybe I just needed to talk to someone. It had been useful to write my thoughts down in the journal the night before, but I still needed to talk to someone. I usually talked to Ric about stuff like this. But Ric couldn't know anything about all of this. If Ric knew, Jenna would know a few minutes later. And they'd probably tell me to back off or something like that. Elena was way too good for me, and they knew that.

"How old are you guys now? It doesn't really seem like there's any age gap between you," she said, looking at Elena. I couldn't help but see the equals between Olivia and Caroline. Both of them were pretty straight forward, and both of them seemed to have the same opinions. Maybe I should get her number for Caroline. Then I would get to spend more time with Elena. I had been able to get her to my self for almost two days, but that couldn't keep on. At some point, Caroline would want to spend time with her best friend. That was after all why she had invited us.

"I'm 24 and she's 20. The age gap is pretty big, but it's never been a problem, and I don't think it'll ever be. She matured a lot when our parents died. Maybe because she spent a lot of time with me," I said, trying to tear my look away from her. I felt way too jealous, when I saw her with the instructor. But I couldn't try to make her jealous. That probably wouldn't work, since I was the one with the feelings, not her. And she would think I was returning to my old habits of screwing girls. That would pretty much ruin everything.

"Well, good luck. I'll distract the instructor. Go over and help her. You two would be the cutest couple ever," she said and walked over to Elena and the instructor. I watched her put her hand on the instructors chest, flirting with him. As soon as he followed her, I walked to Elena, ready to show her how to stand on the board.

"You need any help?" I asked, trying to smile as sweetly as possible. She turned around, and smiled at me, slightly blushing. Wait, was she blushing?

"And you think you're able to help me, Salvatore?" she asked, raising one eyebrow. I laughed and grabbed one of her arms.

"Yeah. I've been surfing since I was 6, I think I can manage to help you," I said, deciding that I didn't want to keep it a secret. I already knew she would be a lot more comfortable with me getting this close to her, than the complete stranger, that was our surf instructor. And I would enjoy being close to her. No, actually, I would love it.

"You have? Then why are we here? It was your idea to take a class," she said, frowning while she stepped up on the surfboard, instantly losing her balance.

"Easy there," I chuckled, placing a hand on her waist.

Her skin felt warm under my hand.

"Got it," she smiled at me.

"You'll be a pro in no time," I teased, as she looked over at the instructor who had moved back to the front of the group, and was now demonstrating how to move from laying on the board to standing.

"I still can't believe you're making me do this," she shook her head.

"You'll thank me for it one day," I told her, before moving back to my own board.

"Okay guys," Dave, the instructor, called out some time later, "I think we can move out to the water now. Pick up your boards and follow me down the beach here."

I picked up my board and made sure Elena had hers before following Dave down to the water.

There were only a few people in the group, but the majority of them were girls, and the instructor was pretty busy helping them, so it gave me a moment with Elena without distractions.

"You okay?" I asked, as she threw her leg over her board, and settled on it.

"Yeah, I'm good," she insisted.

I got on my own board, and pushed through the water until I was side by side with Elena's.

"Let me know when you feel ready to take on a wave," I told her.

She raised an eyebrow at me, looking fairly insecure.

"I think I'll wait and watch first..." she trailed it off. Fine, if she wanted to watch, I would give her something to watch.

"Here," I paddled out a little, "I'll take one, and you can see how you are suppose to do it."

She nodded, so I paddled out further until the waves started picking up.

Recalling on my childhood teachings, I dove under the smaller waves coming up moments later to see a good sized one forming.

Remembering everything my father had told me about catching a wave, I swam as hard as I could.

Within moments, I was perfectly aligned, and jumped up, leaning forward on the board.

I felt the balance shift as the wave caught the board and lifted it, gliding across the folding water.

I smiled as I realized how much I missed this, though I couldn't remember the last time I'd been on a board. Probably one of those early college spring breaks. Had I even been surfing back then? There had always been a lot of alcohol involved.

The board slid along the water, coming out of the wave straight and true.

I was a little proud, and couldn't help but show off as I directed it back toward Elena. Let's see quarterback do that.

She was clapping, as I got back down into a sitting position.

"Impressive," she smirked.

I did a fake bow, and she giggled.

"I'm really not sure I'll be able to do it like that..." she said, blushing slightly. What was with her and blushing?

I shrugged at her, pretending I didn't see it.

"Well, you won't be able to, unless you try."

She nodded, then sighed. She knew I was right.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know..."

"Here, lets swim out and find you a wave."

I led her forward, and she followed under the water.

Once we were a little further out, I checked the horizon.

"There," I pointed, "See the third one forming out there?"

She gazed out, then nodded. I had a hard time not looking at her, and focusing on the surfing. Why did she have to be so beautiful?

"That one's going to build up to a good size, when it gets closer to being fully formed, start paddling toward the shore," I explained.

She nodded nervously, and turned her board around, getting ready.

"Go when I tell you to," I instructed, "and only jump up, when you feel the water about to lift you."

"Okay," she agreed, a look of determination plastered on her face.

I almost wanted to grin again. God, she looked adorable.

She was so into this, and she didn't even realize it. It made me feel good to be able to share something I enjoyed with her. We had done a lot of stuff together, but never anything like surfing. That might have something to do with her thing with staying in a hoodie on the beach, every single time we went. But here she was, right next to her, in a way too cute swimming suit, learning to surf. And she was here with me.

"Lean forward a little," I told her, and tried not to stare at her ass as she did so... but God, if her arched back wasn't a temptation all on it's own.

I turned back toward the wave to distract myself. I really needed to get my shit together. I was acting like some lovestruck teenager.

"Okay," I told her, "Start peddling!"

She took off, faster than I expected, and soon the water lifted her up.

She stood, but jumped a little too soon, and I watched as she folded under the board, the water taking her under.

Quickly, I swam in her direction, pushing my board as hard as I could, but she had already surfaced by the time I got to her.

"You okay?!" I asked, worry burning in my stomach. I would never forgive my self if she got hurt, because of me. I was the one forcing her to go surfing.

She nodded and laughed at me.

"I'm fine, Damon!"

Using the string attached to her ankle, she pulled her board back over and lifted herself onto it.

"Well...I did say it would take practice," I said, smirking at her. I couldn't wait to see her back over the water again.

She smiled and splashed water at me.

"Then we should keep practicing."

* * *

A few hours later, Elena had practically mastered surfing... Well, maybe not mastered, but she was at least able to hold herself on the board. And she looked beautiful when doing so.

I grinned as the force of her last one brought her back to me.

"How was that one?" she asked eagerly. I almost laughed at her happy face. It was amazing seeing her this happy and carefree. I loved it. And she looked too cute, happy about her accomplishments on the surf board.

"You looked great!" I promised, smiling at her.

She grinned as we sat on the surfboards.

"You were right, this is pretty fun."

I nodded, remembering the times I had surfed with my father. It was great sharing this with Elena. I wouldn't want anyone else to go with me.

"You sore yet?" I asked, trying to get my thoughts away from my parents. I didn't need to be sad right now. We were having fun.

Her brows furrowed slightly.

"Am I suppose to be?" she asked, looking down at her thighs on the board. God, I would like those wrapped around my waist...

"Sometimes... Surfing does require a lot of muscle use. Flexibility can help," I said, trying to get my mind out of the gutter. I really didn't want to think like that, at that moment. My shorts wasn't loose enough for that.

"Hmm, well, I guess I'm pretty flexible then, because I don't feel anything right now," she said with a big smile.

I chuckled at her. God, she was cute.

"Just wait until tomorrow. You'll feel it," I promised.

She nodded.

"Probably. However, I doubt either of us will make it to tomorrow if we get back to the house too late. Care's gonna kill us. We've been here for quiet some time."

I tried not to groan, as the thought of the pesky blond interrupted my mental image of Elena's flexibility.

"Nah, she's probably too busy with Matt to care."

Elena flinched a little, and I internally hoped it was out of disgust, rather than jealousy. Was she really thinking about him right now? Was she wishing it was him down here, instead of me? Would she rather be home, doing what Caroline was doing with Matt?

I hoped not.

"But we can find something else to do, if you want to take a break from the water?" I added, and she nodded. She had probably had enough of the water for now. We had been in for a long time.

"Yeah, we can run our boards back to the rental shack and see what's on the boardwalk or something?"

"Yeah, sure," I agreed easily.

* * *

We paddled back to the shore, and I noticed that most of our surfing group had dispersed. We must have been out there longer than I realised. Oh well, time with Elena was worth it.

Speaking of more time with her...

I glanced around hopefully, and spotted a blond head in the distance, near the rental shack. Good, she hadn't left yet.

"Hey, you want to grab our stuff? I'll take the boards back," I asked Elena with a smile.

She nodded, handing over her surf board, and I easily shifted them under my arm, before jogging over to the shack.

"Olivia, right?" I asked, coming up behind the girl.

She turned around, then smiled at me.

"Right. That's me," she said, shifting her weight onto her left leg.

"Hey, I was just wondering... I know it's going to seem sort of random... But I'm here with a few other people, and if you aren't busy later, I think you and one of my girls would really hit it off," I said, thinking about Caroline.

She smiled.

"Yeah, sure! I'm vacationing here to meet new people."

I grinned at her. I really owed her for distracting that surf instructor.

"Awesome. Can I get your number? I'll give it to her, and I'm sure she'll set up a shopping day or something," I said, trying to remember what girls do.

Nodding, Olivia grabbed a pen from the window of the shop.

"Here, give me your arm," she said, reaching for my arm.

I extended it, and she wrote her number on my skin.

"Just tell her to call me. Then we'll figure something out," she said, smiling at me.

"Okay, thanks."

I smiled, and continued talking with her until it was my turn to check in the boards, completely unaware that a brown pair of eyes had followed my every move.

* * *

"Come on, Lena. There's something I want you to see," I said, returning from the shack. I knew she was getting hungry, but that had to wait, until we got back. She looked at me, looking very curious, but I didn't tell her anything.

"Please! Do you trust me?" I asked, and smiled at her. She laughed and nodded. I smiled and reached for her hand, wanting to hold it. Her cheeks turned red, as I grabbed it, and softly pulled her with me. She had put her shoes down in the bag, and I loved seeing that she hadn't put on her dress again. She was still wearing her bikini, and I loved the view. I wouldn't mind if she wore that a little more often.

"Are you going to tell me where you're taking me?" she asked, smiling at me. I raised one eyebrow, as we walked along the waterline, my hand still wrapped firmly around hers.

"Nope. You just have to wait and see," I said as we got near the place I really wanted her to see. She didn't know that I had been her before. I had been on this exact beach lot's of times before. My mom loved this place, when she was still alive. And there was a very special place I wanted to share with her.

"Fiiine!" she said, and leaned into me. At that moment I couldn't think of anything else, than how much we had to look like a couple in love. I still held her hand, and I really wanted to intertwine my fingers with hers. I wanted to place kisses all over her body, and hold her close. I wanted every single person to see that she was my girl, and that nothing was going to do us apart. Not any hot douchebag, not any girl. I wouldn't just leave her, like so many people had done.

* * *

As we made our way into the small cavern, I saw her eyes widen, as she took it all in. She didn't let go of my hand, but walked forward slowly, dragging me behind her.

The cavern was a place I loved to come as a child. Most people didn't even notice it. They were too busy with their lifes, to explore the nature. As soon as you stepped in, your feet were buried in the soft sand, and a small river of water chuckled lightly, making the place seem almost magical. You could see the water and the horizon, if you sat down, facing the ocean.

"Wauw... It's beautiful, Damon. How did you know this place was here? I didn't see it, when we walked outside," she said, looking completely amazed by the cavern. I smiled and let her take everything in.

"That's kind of a long story. I was hoping you were up for some early snacking?" I said as I retrieved the strawberries and the champagne from the bag. She turned around, and looked even more surprised.

"You brought strawberries and champagne? What is this, like a date or something?" she said, blushing as soon as the words were out her mouth. I raised one eyebrow and sat down in the sand, making small holes for the champagne and the glasses.

"That depends on your definition on a date," I said and motioned for her to sit down in the sand. She flopped down and watched me, as I filled the glasses with champagne and handed her one.

"Two people with a mutual interest, getting to know each other, I guess," she said, accepting the glass, while keeping her gaze to the sand. I couldn't help but chuckle at her. God, she was innocent. Sometimes it was rather funny. I knew exactly how to get her all riled up. All you had to do, was mention anything sexual, and she would be all perplex.

"Very innocent definition, Lena. Well, do we have a mutual interest?" I asked, purposely flirting with her. Her face was starting to get as red as a tomato. She drank the champagne quickly. Raising an eyebrow, I filled her up, excited for her to get drunk. She was always a lot funnier when she was drunk, than when she was stone sober.

"Maybe. I have no idea what interest you have," she said, bending her legs and reaching for the strawberries. I let her take one, but promised my self that it would be the last one she ate by her self. I was pulling all sails today.

"Well, do you intend to find out?" I asked, surprised that she actually answered my flirt. It really didn't seem like her, and she couldn't already be influenced by the alcohol. She wasn't easy like that. No way.

She looked at me for a moment, before she burst into laughter. Why the hell was she laughing? This really wasn't a moment for laughing.

"Sorry, Damon, I'm just not... Does that really work on the girls you pick up at bars?" she asked, and drank almost half of her champagne glass in one down. I frowned at her, wondering what made her act like this. She used to be a lot more... Insecure.

"I'm not trying to pick you up, Lena," I said, trying not to sound too rejected. What was going on in her head?

"I know. But you used one of your lines. Sorry, I just haven't heard you use those on me before," she said, giggling lightly. Was the champagne that strong? I decided not to answer that, and tell her about the cavern instead.

"I used to go here with my mom, when we were kids," I said, leaning back in the soft sand. Her eyes went wide as she sat down her now empty glass. She was going through them fast. Did she feel like she needed to be drunk?

"She would take me here, when dad was out with some of the guys from work. And we could sit here forever, building sandcastles and eating ice cream. I loved spending time with her. This was kind of our place," I said, remembering the times I had spent with her in the cavern. I had been happy. She always made me happy. But ever since she died, Elena had been the only woman in my life.

"I miss her," Elena said, as she laid down in the sand, and looked at me. I frowned and filled her glass again. Okay, maybe she shouldn't have anymore alcohol right now, but my mom had taught me how to be a perfect gentleman. And I would be a gentleman, when it came to Elena. That was exactly what she deserved.

"She was a wonderful woman... I miss them, Damon. Our mothers. They would've been able to tell me what to do," she said. I sighed silently, trying not to think of the whole Matt-Elena thing. She would get over him. I was going to make sure of that.

* * *

**So there you have it! Chapter 11. This turned out just a bit longer than I had actually wanted it to be, but I guess it's okay! Be good, review, and I'll see you tomorrow!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Okay, as promise, here's chapter 12! HOPEFULLY you'll forgive me for the long break, after reading this! I am working REALLY hard on chapter 13, because I really want to get it up for you guys as fast as possible, but I'm doing a really big assignment the next two weeks, so I can't promise when the next update will be up! I'm working on it, I promise!**

**See you at the bottom!**

* * *

**Chapter 12: Elena**

"God, I'm tired," I said, as we walked in the door to the beach house. Damon chuckled behind me, as he closed the door and sat down the bag with our things. I went to the living room, and flopped down on the couch. My legs were sore from the surfing, and my skin felt weird after being in the water and getting dried by the sun. Oh, and I was just a bit drunk from the champagne Damon had brought. Great combination, really.

I probably shouldn't have gulped it down like I did, especially because I hadn't had any lunch. The alcohol was way too strong for me at the moment. Normally I'm not easily affected by alcohol. I've always been able to keep up with Damon at bars and stuff. But by then I had made sure I had eaten enough food.

"You should be. You've been surfing and drinking. Not a pretty combination. You want some coffee or something? You're going to have a bad hangover tonight," Damon said, as he walked in the room and sat down on the chair next to the couch. I shrugged and closed my eyes. The light was way too strong for my eyes. All I really wanted to do, was to go to bed and sleep this off.

Much to my surprise, I felt two arms wrap around me, and lift me from the couch. Normally I would've fought him on the subject, but I was way too drunk and way too tired to do anything but wrap my arms around his neck and let him carry me to our bedroom.

Our bedroom.

That sounded good. It sounded right. I loved knowing that we were forced to sleep in the same bed for three weeks. This had been the best idea Caroline had ever had. I had to remember to thank her when we returned home. No matter if Damon and I got together, this trip had been amazing, and I had been close with Damon. I actually had a good time.

As he put me down on the bed, I didn't let go of his neck and pulled him with me. He chuckled and pulled me closer to his body. Content with being close to him, I let out a happy sigh and closed my eyes once again.

"I'm really glad you came, Damon. This wouldn't be fun without you," I murmured, as I slowly felt my self fall in a drunken sleep.

I nearly didn't hear him, as he answered.

"I'm really glad I came too."

* * *

I yawned as I felt my self slowly wakening from my sleep. But something seemed off. Something was wrong.

First of all, I wasn't wearing clothes. I was completely naked. And it only took me a second to realize that I wasn't alone in bed either. Someone was behind me, placing small kisses up and down my neck, while holding me close by my waist. The kisses left a burning trail along my neck, something I had never felt before.

I felt all of my body stiffen as the hand that were currently resting on my stomach, started moving up and down, caressing my abdomen gently. What the hell had happened, and who the hell was laying behind me? And why the hell were we naked?!

"Mmh, morning beautiful."

I recognised the voice in a heartbeat. I would always recognise that voice.

Damon.

It was Damon's hand that was caressing my body, Damon's lips that were placing kisses all over my neck and Damon's naked body that were pressed against mine. What the hell was going on? The only thing I remembered were going surfing with him. How did we end up naked in bed together?

Slowly, I turned around, only to be met by Damon's incredibly blue eyes, looking at me, as if I was the most precious thing in the whole damn world. Even though I loved the way his gaze fell upon my face, I had to know what was going on. This seemed wrong.

"Damon? What's going on?" I asked, loving the way his one hand touched my face, slowly caressing my cheek. He frowned, as he placed a small kiss on my nose. The gesture made my body shutter and my heart flutter. Was this how it was like, waking up to Damon Salvatore, when you actually meant something to him? When you wasn't just his friend?

"You don't remember? How drunk were you yesterday?" he asked, starting to place small kisses down my neck. His lips made me feel weird. A tingling sensation filled my body as his kisses were slowly trailing down my torso, resulting in his mouth on my naked breast. A moan escaped my lips, as his tongue started playing with my nipple. Why did that feel so good? Shouldn't it feel weird? I couldn't let the thoughts wander any further. Whatever he was doing to my body, made it very hard for me to focus.

"I wasn't drunk yesterday," I said, fighting to keep my breath somewhat steady. His hands caressed the sides of my body, as he let the other nipple get the same attention. I felt a wonderful throbbing between my legs. Was I getting turned on? I let out a loud gasp, as he playfully bit the nipple he was currently playing with, and his hand cupped my sex.

I should stop him. I was a virgin, and I should tell him to stop, because I wasn't ready to loose it now. How could I be sure that I wasn't just another one of his girls? I should really stop him, but what he was doing to me was way too pleasure-filled for me to make him stop. I enjoyed it. I liked it. And I wanted him to go even further.

"You had to be pretty drunk, if you don't remember what we did yesterday, Lena," he said, trailing kisses down my stomach, stopping just by the bikini line. Was I seriously letting him do this?  
Wait, what did we do yesterday? Did he meant that we... No, no, no, that couldn't be right. I wouldn't just let him take my virginity and then forget about it. Not with Damon. I had been wanting him ever since we were kids! No way I had forgotten our first time. I wouldn't let that happen!

"What did we do yesterday?" I asked, forgetting everything about keeping my breath under control. There was no point to it, really. His tongue flicked over my clit, gently and only once. A big gasp escaped my lips at the new sensation. It felt good. Way too good. Why was it I was letting him do this, again?

He smiled at me, placing both my legs over his shoulders, giving him full access to my body. God, I felt nervous. My cheeks were turning red, and I felt insecure as hell. He placed one small kiss on me, and then looked at my face again.

"I'd rather show you than tell you. Don't be shy, Lena. You're beautiful and I want you. So much. Don't ever doubt that," he said and then buried his head between my legs. A moan escaped my lips, as my hand went to his hair, and grabbed on. His soft tongue felt wonderful against my sensitive skin. A wonderful feeling was shooting through my lower abdomen, making it impossible for me not to moan his name. I felt his lips curl into a smile, as his tongue went inside me. It was a weird and new feeling, but I loved it. And I loved that he was the one to do this to me.

As I felt my inside clench, he removed his head, making me feel like the world would stop, if he didn't continue. But he didn't. He kissed his way back to my mouth, before positioning his head at my entrance.

"It might hurt slightly, Lena. Not as much as yesterday, but still," he said, while he slowly slid inside of me, making me clamp my nails down his back, while screaming out.

* * *

I woke up with a giant gasp, sitting up in the big bed I shared with Damon. I was alone, and I was still in my bikini. The sun was setting, sending a cascade of orange light through the window. To say that I was confused, would be an understatement. I had a weird throbbing sensation between my legs, that I had never felt before, and my bikini bottom was soaked. Did I just have a wet dream? About Damon? Did a freaking dream just make me... Well, wet?

I guess it did. And I was shaken as hell. I wasn't used to this kind of stuff. I knew that I loved Damon more than what was healthy, but this was a whole new level. I had never had these kinds of dreams about him.

The dream had been filled with new feelings, new sensations, stuff I had never ever experienced before. And the dream made me realise just how much I wanted to experience them – with Damon. I really didn't want to try any of these things, with anyone else than Damon. He was going to be my first, and I was going to be one hundred percent ready, when we did it. And I also had to be certain that I wasn't just another one of his girls. That would simply break my heart into pieces. How could I ever survive getting used by the man of my dreams? I couldn't.

And where the hell did these thoughts come from? There was no way Damon would ever want to be with me like that. Sure, he seemed to be looking a bit more at me, after I followed Caroline's advice, and changed my style, but no way he wanted to get together. Why was I even thinking about that? It wasn't going to happen, and I was only hurting my self more, by thinking that he would.

God, I needed to get a grip!

Trying to get myself together, I got out of the bed, and went straight for my suitcase. I needed to get some clean clothes on. Right now. I really didn't want to be in the wet swim suit anymore. Especially not when I knew it wasn't water that had made the bottom this damp.

Gathering a pair of shorts and a tanktop, plus underwear, I made my way to the bathroom, quickly stripping off the bikini. As I stood there, all naked in the bathroom, I looked in the big mirror above the sink.

The girl staring back didn't remind me of my self. It didn't look like me. My long hair was fuzzy, looking as though I had been tossing and turning in my sleep. My skin was getting even more tanned than usual, and my eyes looked wild. There was no other way to describe them.

Turning sideways, I looked at my body. I still wasn't anywhere near comfortable in my own skin. My stomach was too big. It wasn't completely flat, like Caroline's was. I wasn't as tall as she was, and my breast wasn't anywhere near as full as hers was. I love Caroline of all my heart, but I had a hard time, not comparing my self to her.

How could I ever seduce Damon, if my body looked like it did? He was used to hot girls, bold girls. Girls whose bodies looked amazing, totally flat stomachs, long legs, full breasts. Girls like Caroline. I was lucky she was with Matt. How could I ever be as good as that? As good as Caroline? Caroline wasn't insecure. She knew how to have fun, she knew exactly how to seduce a boy. Why couldn't I be more like her? Why did I get all shy, and locked up?

Sighing I took a look at my left arm. The scars were still noticeable, but only if you knew they were there. It was starting to look a lot like I had never been sitting with a razor blade and cut open my skin. And all I wanted to do, was to make new scars. I wanted to rip open my skin, just like I used to. Make new scars, new signs that I was a wreck. New signs that I wasn't worth spending time on, not worth loving.

But I couldn't do it. I just couldn't. I didn't have any clothes that would hide it, and I did not want Damon to know. How do you explain that?

_'Oh, the scars? That's just from cutting, because I knew I could never be anything more than friend to you'_

I don't think so. No, he couldn't ever know. The scars would fade completely, and he would be oblivious to it, for the rest of his life. Just like he had been with my feelings. That was the best way, I was sure of that.

Sighing, I pulled on my clothes and examined my self one last time in the mirror. The clothes made me seem confident. Like I actually liked my own body, like I was secure. But I had never felt more vulnerable. Not even when I had been in Damon's arm, sobbing, because of our parents. No, this was worse.

I hated showing off my body. Everyone was able to see my body, see my curves and everything that was wrong with my body. I hated the way everyone was staring at me, in the air port, at the beach. It made me feel naked. And that was what I was.

Damon had saved me, every single time. I wasn't thrilled about him looking at me either, but he was my best friend, and as always, he was there for me. He protected me, because that was what he did. I had no idea what to do without him.

* * *

Taking in a deep breath, I left the bathroom, and headed downstairs. Damon was standing by the stove, cooking something that smelled sinfully good. As soon as I stepped in the kitchen, he turned around and smiled at me.

"Hey, sleepyhead. You're finally awake. Just in time for dinner," he said, as he returned to the food. I smiled and flopped down on one of the bar stools by the marble island in the middle. I loved seeing Damon cooking. It was like he was in his rightful element by the stove. There was absolutely no denying that Damon's food was heaven sent. Living with him, meant that I got to eat his food, almost every day. There was nothing I enjoyed more, than spending time with him, and we had some kind of silence agreement, that we always ate at least one meal a day together. It was a weird thing, really, but it made me certain that I would always see him at least once a day. Now that we was in Cali, I got to be with him all the time. We rarely left each others side, and I loved it.

"How long was I out? And what are we having? It smells wonderful," I said, getting comfortable in the bar stool. Somehow, it wasn't hard regaining a good mood, when he was around. He made me happy.

"A couple of hours, I believe. It'll be hard for you to sleep tonight. Pasta carbonara," he said, smiling, even though he didn't look at me. The food craved his full attention.

"Well, then we have to put on a movie or something. Then it'll be late before we go to bed, and I'll be able to sleep," I said.

"Sure. I'm on, unless we're watching chick flicks. Just remember, you have to have energy for tomorrow. What I've got planned, craves energy," he said, looking at me shortly. My eyes widened a bit at that comment. What did he have planned? And how many were going? Did I get to spend another day in Damon's company, or was Caroline and Matt going as well? I loved spending time with Damon alone, but I needed to spend time with Caroline and Matt as well. They were my best friends.

"No chick flicks, I promise. But no horror movies! Unless you want to comfort me all night, because I'm scared," I said, feeling the heat in my cheeks. He knew I wasn't good at the whole horror movie stuff. When I watched my first horror movie, when I was 15, he'd been in bed with me for almost a whole week, comforting me every time I woke up with a nightmare. Needless to say I had been excited about being that close to him every night, but I didn't really like him seeing me like that. After all, it was just some stupid movie.

"Well, I wouldn't mind comforting you... You know I don't mind. But I think you need your sleep more than I need to..." he stopped him self, and smiled shortly down at the food, "no horror movies. I promise. We'll find something funny or action."

I frowned. Why did he stop in the middle of a sentence? What had he meant to say? He always said exactly what he wanted to say. He never kept anything a secret, when it came to me. I was his best friend, for God's sake. But this time he had stopped him self, and I was curious.

"You need to what?" I asked, hoping to find out what he had been wanting to say. He turned off the stove and started getting the food ready for dinner. Then he turned to me and looked me in the eye, a smirk firmly in place on his lips.

"That's for me to know and for you to... Dot, dot, dot." I smacked him playfully on the arm, while laughing at him. He smiled at me and returned to the food.

"Since when do you keep things a secret from me," I asked, still sounding playful. I had to remember that he wasn't the one keeping a big secret from me. I was the one lying to him, almost every single day. But I was lying to him for a good reason! I would loose him completely, if he knew about my feelings.

"Well, I do remember something about my best friend crying in the bathroom, while refusing to tell me what was wrong," he said, raising one single eyebrow at me. I grew silent with that one. I couldn't tell him what had been wrong. Of course I wanted to, but I couldn't. Then he would know, about my feelings, about my cutting... No, I couldn't tell him. Would I be able to actually lie to him, and give him some other bad reason for crying? It couldn't be our parents. I wouldn't keep that a secret. What other reason could I possibly have for crying?

"It was girl stuff, Damon. You'd be disgusted if you knew. Trust me, you really don't want to know what it was. And does it really matter? I'm fine. I haven't been crying since then. I'm having fun here, with you and Caroline and Matt," I said, forcing a smile. If I was going to get him to let this go, I had to pretend like this wasn't a big deal. I guess it wasn't really. I had been in love with him forever, nothing new there. I had been wanting to cut for a long time as well. Nothing was new. Not a big deal, Elena, not a big deal.

"Is this your way of being subtle about periods?" he asked, suddenly looking a bit disgusted. Okay, hadn't seen that one coming, but fine. Trying my best to look like I was embarrassed, I looked down at the counter, letting my hair cover my face. He knew I'd be blushing if I was embarrassed, and there was absolutely no heat in my cheeks right at the moment. Of course there weren't, I wasn't on my period. I hadn't been ever since I got my contraceptive implant. Jenna had been very cautious about me and guys, even though I really didn't want to be with anyone. That's why she made me get the implant, in stead of the pills. Also, because she didn't trust me to actually remember to take a pill every single day. An implant in my arm would mean that I didn't need to remember. That had been a year ago, and even though I didn't go to bed with guys (besides Damon, but that didn't really count), I was happy about it. Periods hadn't been a problem since then, and I enjoyed it.

Damon's small groan make me come back to reality.

"Really? You were crying about periods? Somehow, I don't really buy that one, Lena. It can't possibly hurt that much. But I'll let this go for now. I'll find out, somehow, but I'm going to let it go right now," he said. Shit. He didn't buy it? God, I needed to come up with some sort of explanation for that situation. I didn't like that he thought I didn't trust him. Because I did. Of course I did. He just couldn't know.

"Mhm, smells good in here. When's dinner ready?" Caroline walked through the door and flopped down in a stool beside me. I smiled at her, as Damon finished up with the food.

"Right now. Go get the table ready, then I'll bring out the food," he said, nodding towards the terrace. We were eating outside again, even though the sun was almost down. All of us enjoyed the California sun. It was hot, every single day, and all of us were getting pretty tanned.

Caroline and I grabbed everything necessary for us to eat, and started decking the table for the four of us. Finally a bit of alone time with Caroline. I had so many things I wanted to talk to her about. The afternoon with Damon had been amazing, but I was really confused. If I didn't knew better, I would say that he had been flirting with me.

"So, it seems like my plan is working just perfect," Caroline said, as we sat down on the chairs, waiting for Damon to bring out the food. I blushed and looked down at my folded hands on the table.

"I don't know, Care. I mean, he seems like he's paying a lot more attention to me, but I'm not sure... I really can't find out," I said, suddenly feeling just as insecure as I had felt when I was standing in front of the mirror in the bathroom. Why did I even think Damon would want to have someone like me?

"Elena trust me, the plan is working just fine. Haven't you seen the way he looks at you? Just keep on going. How did he react to the night gown?" she asked, a dirty smile playing on her lips. I blushed slightly and rolled my eyes at her.

"I didn't wear it. I borrowed some of his clothes instead. I couldn't just go out in that one... That would be way too... Revealing. He's already seen me in a bikini! Isn't that enough for now?" I said, trying to keep my voice down. He could be coming out every second, and everything could get pretty awkward, pretty fast. She laughed, as I blushed, and put on her sunglasses.

"That's up to you. But you will wear that gown while we're here! Trust me, he's going to love it..."

"Who's going to love what?"

I felt my body stiffen, as I heard Damon's smooth voice from the door. He couldn't have heard what Caroline just said! That would ruin everything! Trying to keep my cheeks from turning red, I tried to make up an excuse.

"Oh, Matt's going to love what I have in store for him tonight," Caroline said, lying smoothly. How did she just make that up? I looked down, letting my hair hide my face, that was gradually turning red. I really didn't want him to question Caroline's lie. If he did, we would be forced to tell him the truth, which would chock him more than he knew. I mentally crossed my fingers, hoping that he would actually believe in our smooth lie.

"Blondie, I do not want to hear any kind of details concerning you and the quarterback's sex life. I'm really better off without," he said, grimacing while placing the food on the table. Caroline didn't answer, but smiled happily at him. I rolled my eyes, still under the cover of my hair. Why did the two of them always have to talk about sex? Sometimes it seemed like they weren't able to speak of anything else. Could sex really be _that _amazing?

"I think our conversation is taking the wrong turn, right, Lena?" Damon said, chuckling lightly at my red cheeks. Thank God he didn't knew what we were actually talking about. I had no idea how he would react. I mean, we had been best friends forever, and I knew almost every part of him. But I had no idea how he would react to the news about me bringing a way too revealing night gown to our little holiday. Oh no, he couldn't know. I would tell him if we ever got together. Of course I would tell him. But right now, I needed to shut the hell up, and play along on Caroline's lie.

"Yeah. This smells delicious, Damon! Surfing makes you hungry," I said, not really thinking about the fact that I hadn't told Caroline about the way we had spent the day. Surely she would want to know what had happened down at the beach.

"Yeah, and food is a great cure for a hangover. How are you feeling?" he asked, reminding me of the time we spent at the cave. I blushed slightly and sipped my soda.

"I'm fine. I don't even have a headache. I'm hangover free," I said, as Matt joined us at the table. I hadn't seen him all day, and was happy to see that he hadn't gone home. Caroline and him fought all the time. I didn't really see what they had to fight about, but they did, nonetheless.

"Hangover free? Someone's been having a fun afternoon!" Matt said, as he sat down next to Caroline and put his hand on her thigh.

"Kids, no sex at the table! I will not accept it!" Damon said in a mocking voice, as he sat down next to me, "and this young lady over here is still innocent. I'd like to keep her eyes the same, thank you!"

Great way to make me feel small, Damon. Just great. I would really never be anything else than his annoying little sister/best friend. Why did I even agree to all of this?

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**So, there you have it! Chapter 12. I really, really, really hope you liked this. I don't feel like I'm really good at writing smut. Not at all. But I really hope you liked it, and I would love to hear what you have to say about it! **

**For those of you following my 'How to save a life', I have REALLY bad news... I lost 19 pages of the story yesterday. I am working on writing the chapters again, but it will take some time, because.. Yeah, well, 19 pages is a lot. **

**Until the next time!**


	13. Chapter 13

**Short chapter, I know, I know! But I couldn't make this any longer. There's stuff that needs to happen from Elena's pov, and that's going to happen in the next one! **

**That being said, I've worked really hard with my beta/pre-reader/whatever you want to call her, and we've actually worked out a complete story line for this. Believe me, you're going to love some of the future chapters! I am _so _excited to post the future chapters, but they will have to wait!  
I'm going to shut up now, and then I hope you'll enjoy this!**

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**Chapter 13: Damon**

"Get your asses down her, God damn it!" I yelled, as the clock on the wall showed Matt and I had been waiting for the girls for almost ten minutes. I mean, how much time can you possibly use on something as unimportant as make-up? Elena for sure didn't need it. She was beautiful without it. I actually preferred her without it.

Sure, I loved the whole transformation she had gone through. I loved the new clothes that were flattering her beautiful body. But I also liked her without her make-up. I loved seeing her at night, without that stuff.

I had never had those thoughts about a girl before. Normally, I hated seeing the girls I had brought home without their make-up on. Something about them just wasn't sexy without.

But I loved seeing Elena all natural. But then again, Elena wasn't just some random girl I had brought home from a bar or a club. She was far more special. I cared for her. Actually, I cared a lot more than I should. I was beginning to understand that I didn't just find her attractive. I was in love with her. For the first time in my life, I was actually in love. And I was in love with my freaking best friend.

I had no idea how everything had changed during such a short amount of time. If Caroline hadn't invited me to join them in Cali, I probably wouldn't have known about my own feelings. I wouldn't know just how much I cared for Elena.

But I did join them, and in those three days we'd spent in Cali, I'd found out some stuff that changed everything. Elena wasn't just my best friend anymore. She had turned out to be a girl I wanted to be with.

"Sorry, Damon, Caroline had a small crisis about her choice of clothing," Elena said, as she emerged from the stairs. She looked beautiful in her strapless yellow summer dress. Her hair was down, and she hadn't put on too much make-up. She was almost natural.

"Let's just get going. We have to go!" I said, feeling very impatient. I really wanted to show Elena Los Angeles. We weren't far from the city. Only 45 minutes of driving. I knew Elena had never been there, and I loved showing her big cities.

And now I would get to see her walk around in that dress, enjoying the sunlight, looking beautiful in the big city. God, I couldn't wait.

"When are you going to tell me where we're going?" she asked, as we made our way to the car. Matt was still inside, waiting for Blondie to come down. God, how important could her clothes be? We really needed to get driving!

"You'll know when we get there, Lena. Don't think about it, and don't ask, because I'm not going to tell you," I said, smirking at her, as we got in the car. Of course she chose to sit next to me. Barbie and Ken could have the backseat. I wanted to keep Elena by my side.

God, since when did I turn into this whimp?

* * *

The drive was almost too much. Elena fell asleep pretty quickly, and Barbie and Ken spent the whole ride making out on the backseat, reminding me that I wouldn't get laid for a very long time. Not until Elena started getting the message, at least. Would I even be with her like that? Of course I wouldn't pressure her to give it up, before she was actually ready. But if I actually accomplished to make her feel something for me, would she want to go all the way with me?  
Of course, she trusted me. I know she did. But did she trust me enough to let me take her virginity? I mean, 20 years was a long time. And she had never really been interested in boys. Would she be able to feel something for me?

I looked at her sleeping form next to me, and smiled. She looked absolutely adorable. A soft smile planted on her lips, and her eyes closed, leaning against the window. God, I loved looking at her. I couldn't get enough, actually.

I forced my gaze away from her, and caught Caroline's look in the rear view mirror. She was smiling knowingly at me. Shit. She couldn't know! Then she would tell Elena. And she couldn't tell her. She couldn't know yet.

Caroline winked and me, and returned her attention to Matt. My whole plan could be completely ruined. If Caroline went on blabbing to Elena, I wouldn't be able to seduce her, the way I had planned. Everything would be one big drama. But what the hell could I do about it? Ask Caroline to keep her mouth shut? Would she listen?

Maybe Blondie didn't even see it. Maybe she just thought I was smiling at a joke or something... If I was lucky, she would believe that. I couldn't do anything about it anyways. If she saw, she did, and I just hoped she would ask me, before saying anything to Elena.

I pulled in a parking lot, and Matt and Caroline got out immediately. They were probably happy to get to stretch their legs. I turned to the side, and started nudging Elena carefully.

"Lena? Sweetie, we're here," I said, smiling as she started wake up. She was cute. All innocent and small.

As her eyes shut open, she looked at me with a calm smile.

"Hey..." she said, sounding rather sleepy. I smiled at her and fetched my sunglasses from my pocket.

"Come on. We have a lot to see," I said, getting out of the car. She followed right behind me, and her eyes went wide, as she saw where we were.

"Los Angeles? You seriously brought me to Los Angeles?!" she said, surprise written all over her face. I smirked at her, feeling pretty happy with my self. It had been the right choice to bring her to Los Angeles. She already seemed to love it, and I hadn't even shown her the town yet. There was so much for her to see.

"Yeah. You like it?" I asked, taking my sunglasses on. She nodded eagerly and put her own sunglasses on. She looked like a dream. The sundress complimented her body, and the smile planted on her lips just made her look even more beautiful. I wish I could take her in my arms right there, and kiss her senseless. God, I wish I could do that.

But no, that had to wait. Hopefully I could make her feel something for me, and then we would be alright to go. Then I would be able to feel those soft looking lips against my own every time I wanted to. I really didn't want to wait.

"Elena! Shopping!" Caroline squeaked, taking Elena's hands. I rolled my eyes. Of course Blondie wanted to shop. She didn't do anything else than that! But I guess I would survive, if Elena wanted to shop as well. I knew she wasn't much for it, but the girls needed to have fun. I wanted Elena to have fun. And if that meant looking at clothes, shoes and accessories all day, I wouldn't complain.

_You are really turning into a sap, Salvatore._

I grinned a bit at the thought. I was whipped. Damon Salvatore was actually whipped. How the hell did that happen?

Well, it was simple enough. I was utterly and totally in love with my best friend. And something told me that the fight for her, would be long.

"Caroline, that really wouldn't be fair to the boys. I mean, we're on a trip together. We can't just run off and start shopping," Elena said, her cheeks turning red, as she looked at Matt. I felt the jealousy let out a mighty roar in the middle of my stomach. She shouldn't be blushing at Matt. He was a quarterback doing drugs, God damnit. She wasn't supposed to like him!

"It's fine. We can join you or find something else to do. Really, Lena, it's fine," I said, flashing her the smile I usually made girls drop with. She smiled back at me, her cheeks still rosy from the blushing. I would love nothing more than to see her face red with color, as her beautiful hair was spread on my pillow, her naked underneath...

_Stop it, Salvatore! Not here!_

I had accepted what I felt about her. No doubt there. But the thought of her, underneath me like that, still did wonders to my body. I hadn't forgotten yesterday morning, and I really didn't want to have to repeat that. She made me feel like a horny little teenage boy. She would be the hot senior girl, the one everyone wanted, and there I was, a freshman, completely and utterly in love with her, wanting to do everything to get her.

How did she transform me into this kind of boy? I had always been able to be in control of my body. During lap dances, strip, everything. I was the one in control, and I knew how to pleasure a girl. But she made me feel out of control.

And God, how I wanted to pleasure her. I would love to see her crumble underneath me, shouting out my name in ecstasy.

_Get your thoughts straight! Don't think of her like that!_

Elena was still smiling at me, her head cocked slightly. I shook my head lightly and joined the others, as we started walking towards the city. I needed to get my head out of the gutter.

* * *

I loved seeing Elena happy. I absolutely loved it. First of all, she seemed to enjoy the sun on her face, and the warmth of California. She looked perfect with the sunshine on her body. She was my California dream. I wanted her. God, how I wanted her.

I wish I could walk next to her, my arm around her or my hand in hers, to make it clear to everyone that this girl was mine.

Sadly, that wasn't really something I could do. Sure, I could go up next to her, put my arm around her shoulder and pull her close, just like I had done in the airport and on the beach. But she seemed to be enjoying her self, and in reality, she wasn't mine at all. I wasn't able to kiss her whenever I wanted, I wasn't able to call her mine. Maybe I never would be.

I felt like going to the closest bar and drinking my self in a stupor. But that would be a very bad idea. Elena would probably kill me. Then she would ask me what was wrong, and in my drunken state, I would probably tell her all about my feelings for her, and she would be disgusted and scared of me for the rest of our lives.

Nope, I was going to remain sober. Maybe even look like I was having fun.

"Why haven't you said anything?"

I looked to my side, confused to see Blondie standing next to me, looking at me with a knowing look. What the hell was she talking about?  
"Haven't said anything about what?" I asked, genuinely confused. I had no idea what she was talking about.

"You like her. Elena," she said, not bothering to tell me the details. I sighed and looked back at Elena. She was talking and laughing with Matt. They looked like they were having a blast. Great, another step back in my plan. Just great.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Caroline," I said, lying to her face. I know, it wasn't nice of me. I probably shouldn't have lied to her, but I was kind of in a hard place. I had never been one to care about feelings, and least of all be this influenced by them. But here I was, head over heels with my best friend, and it was ruining me.

"Oh, you know exactly what I mean. Don't give up, Damon. I won't tell her. Just... Don't give up on her."

"What do you expect me to do? She's clearly not interested," I said, not taking my eyes off her. She was still talking to the quarterback. Caroline sighed.

"There's this club close to the beach house. Tell her you want to go dancing with her, and then we'll go together. Just trust me."  
And with that comment she sped up, and joined Elena and Matt. I saw Caroline kiss Matt gently, and Elena looked away. Couldn't he see what he was doing to her? She was miserable, and it was because of him! I wanted to snap his neck. No one should hurt my girl.

What the hell was going on with Caroline and that party? Sure, I would love to see Elena at a party, but I hadn't exactly seen that one coming from Caroline, in that situation.

"You okay?" I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer. She looked up at me, and a smile appeared on her soft lips again. Oh, how I wanted to kiss her.

"Yeah, I'm fine. This is really nice, Damon. I'm really glad you brought me here," she said, leaning into my embrace. I smiled, enjoying the way her body seemed to fit perfect into mine. I had never felt that way with any girl before. Somehow, they were always awkward to hold. They never really seemed to fit in with me. Too tall, too small, too big boobs, too small boobs...

Everything seemed to be wrong with other girls. But this girl, right next to me, fit perfectly into my body.

"Of course. We're in California. You need to get the full experience. And LA is a part of that experience. We'll go see some stuff, then we can eat and you can go shopping with Blondie. We're going to Disneyland some other day. I want you to have the full day there," I said, smiling at the plans I had made. I knew Elena loved Disneyland. We'd been in the one in Florida lot's of times. She became a small child as soon as we stepped inside. She would run around to every single ride, pulling me behind her. And I would follow her, a smile playing on my lips as I enjoyed her being carefree.

"I'm so happy we went. I know I keep repeating, but I really love spending time with you," she said, blushing slightly. I smiled and removed the hair that was falling in front of her face. I wanted to see her. She was beautiful. She was already getting even more tanned from the sharp sun.

"I'm glad we went too. Hey, there's this club not very far from the house. I was thinking we could go in like two days," I asked, feeling a bit nervous. I knew Elena wasn't the type to go to parties. Not at all, actually. But I really wanted to see her let loose, and I needed alcohol and music for her to do that. That's why the party was perfect. Caroline was right.

"Sure. It sounds cool. Caroline and Matt can join us, right?" she asked, smiling at me. I nodded, happy that she accepted. If I was lucky, she would wear a dress. I know, she had been wearing dresses during most of our trips, but I suspected that a party dress would be a lot more... Revealing. I know I was crazy, but I wanted to see her. If I could, I would have her underneath me, all naked, all the time.

I really needed to stop thinking of her like that! Sure, I wanted her. I knew I wanted her. But that didn't mean I should think about her like that, all the time. It resulted in me having a raging hard-on, in the middle of a big city. And if Elena saw that...

"Thanks, Damon. Now, let's go see this city!"

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**Okay, so that was chapter 13! PLEASE leave a review! I've lost a lot of reviewers during this break I had, and I'm really scared I'll loose more, now that I have this big assignment coming up (wish I could skip it, but it's the admission for the next grade). So leave a review! It doesn't have to be long or anything, just leave a few words!  
Flora, please make sure I can respond to your reviews! It's really annoying not being able to answer :( **

**See you next time!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Okay guys, I know I said I wasn't going to upload, but... Well, my wonderful beta _Foreverfirstloves _and I started talking, and I just couldn't help my self! I hope you all like this. That being said, the rest of the story is actually plotted out, and most of it already written, so updates will be faster and faster! I still don't know how many chapters it's going to be and so, but I'm excited to hear what you think about this chapter!**

**See you at the bottom!**

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**Chapter 14: Elena**

"Damon, are you sure you're okay with Care and I going shopping?" I asked, still feeling a bit bad about just leaving the boys behind. I wasn't crazy about shopping. Not at all. But I felt like it would be nice to get some time alone with Caroline. Plus, she wanted to get me a dress for the party Damon talked about. Apparently I couldn't just go in jeans and a shirt. Caroline insisted I had to wear a dress. I had no idea why, but she said I had to. It probably had something to do with the whole 'mission let's make Damon fall for you' thing. Sometimes it was complicated.

"Lena, it's fine! Just go. I'll take Matt to a stripclub, and teach him a couple of tricks or something. Get him drunk. Don't worry, we'll be fine. Just give me a call when you want to go home or do something else. I'll be here. Promise," he said and gave me a hug. I wrapped my arms around him and smiled at him.

"Thanks."

He pressed a light kiss to my forehead, making my skin tingle. How did he do that, every single time his lips touched my skin? He had been doing that ever since I was a kid. Placing kisses on my forehead, the top of my head, my palms, my hands. Innocent places, but it always left the skin tingling from the touch. Now he had done it once again.

"Come on, Elena. Let's just go," Caroline said, pulling my hand. She really wanted to get going. She hadn't been shopping in almost a week. I suspected she was dying at that point. That girl had too much money for her own good.

"I'll see you later."  
Damon and Matt left, leaving Caroline and I alone to shop. She looked at me with an excited smile, as she started dragging me down the street. Oh no, she had a plan. I recognised the look in her eyes. She knew exactly where she was going, and I really didn't want to know what it was going to lead to. With Caroline, it could be practically everything. I was hoping for a dress or just normal clothes. She would think I also needed new underwear and a pair of high heels for the occasion, but I really didn't feel like being tall. I would never even be close to being taller than Damon, but I liked my own height, plus I'd be wobbling all evening.

I really just wanted to go in a pair of ballerina's, jeans and a t-shirt. That would be comfortable. But I knew that wasn't what Caroline had in mind. She never went with the casual look. And now that she had me to dress up, she surely wasn't going to let the chance pass by.

Once again, I couldn't help but think of what I'd gotten myself into.

* * *

"Caroline Elizabeth Forbes, I am _not _wearing this! Never in life!" I said, as I looked at the dress she had put me in. It was extremely short, almost showing off my panties, and it was so tight I was afraid I was going to faint. Because of the tightness, my breast were pushed completely up, looking two sizes bigger. And last, but not least, it was crimson red. I looked like a hooker. There was absolutely no way I was showing my self to Damon in this. Not going to happen. Period.

"Come on, Elena. You have an amazing body! And Damon needs to see that! Just show it off! It isn't a bad thing! Trust me, he'll love it!" Caroline said, looking at my body. I shook my head and returned to the changing room, ready to take off the dress.

"No, Care. I agreed to wear a dress. That doesn't mean you get to make me look like a hooker. Let's find another one," I said, shrugging out of the tight dress, with a sigh. I wasn't backing down on this one. No way she was getting me to wear this!

"Fine, fine! Come out, let's go find another dress."  
I sighed and left the changing room, walking around the store, looking at all the beautiful dresses. Of course they were all beautiful. But I couldn't wear them. I just couldn't. They wouldn't fit my body.

"Care, what do you think about this one?" I said, turning around to show Caroline the deep blue dress. I wasn't met with her blonde hair and blue eyes, though. I walked directly into a male chest, making me stumble back.

"Oh my God, I'm so sorry. I thought you were my friend... Not that you look like her or anything, I just didn't see others and I thought that she was following..."  
I stopped my self. I was babbling on, when there was a mysterious, very good-looking stranger standing in front of me. He was tall – just like Damon, and his green eyes were looking curiously at me. His sandy hair was messy, and instantly I couldn't help but notice just how much better Damon's looked.

"Hey, it's fine. No problem. I'm Mason," he said, extending his hand for me. I looked down for a moment, before looking into his eyes. They were almost sparkling.

"Elena. Nice to meet you," I said, shaking his hand slightly. He smiled at me, looking down at the dress in my hand.

"I know you wanted your friends opinion. But I think that will look absolutely dashing on you."  
I couldn't help but blush a bit at his compliment, and looked down at my shoes. To be honest, I was crazy about the dress in my hand. It was short, but not too short, the bottom part made of some fluffy fabric. The top was looking like a corset, and would fit great on my body. And it was a lot more revealing than something I would've chosen before Cali. But I had changed. Thanks to Caroline.

"Thanks... I haven't tried it on yet," I said, forcing myself to look at him again. He was still smiling, looking at my face.

"Why are you blushing? You _are _a very beautiful girl," he said. His smile was radiating warmth. Wait a moment, was this guy actually flirting with me? That would mean he found me attractive! Would it hurt to flirt a bit back? I mean, I wasn't taken. Damon still hadn't made a single move towards me. He probably never would. Should I keep sticking around?

It would be alright to flirt with him.

_Be bold, Elena. _

I smiled back at him, looking at the dress.

"Why, thank you. You don't look too bad yourself. I think I'm going to go put this one. Then you can tell me if you like it or not," I said, walking towards the changing rooms, trying to put an extra sway in my hips, and hide my insecure face. I had absolutely no idea what the hell I was doing. Trying to keep the bold facade, I went to the changing room, and quickly got the dress on. It fit like a glove. There was no way I wasn't buying it.

Sure, I didn't really like showing off my legs and stuff like that, but I had to change. I had to show some of it off. Caroline wouldn't let me go back to my sweats after this. This dress was perfect.

I emerged from the changing room, pleased to see Mason standing there and looking at me. A smile erupted on his lips, as he looked me up and down. I spun around slowly, showing off every angle of the dress.

"You look amazing. Really, I'm buying that dress for you." I almost dropped my jar. No way I was letting him pay for the dress. I wouldn't even let Damon do that. But Damon knew me, and Damon knew that I couldn't stay mad at him, which was why he tended to ignore stuff like that. But I wouldn't let Mason do that.

"No, you're not. It's really nice of you, but I'm buying it my self," I said, looking at the mirror in the end of the shop. It did look good. With a pair of high heeled shoes, it would be completely perfect.

"Oh my God, Lena, that's perfect! You need to get that one!" Caroline squealed, as she saw me. Mason laughed and stood besides me.

"Yeah, I think so too. Well, fine, I'll let you pay for the dress, if you let me take you out for dinner," Mason bargained. I couldn't help but blush a bit, ruining my bold facade completely. I needed to get my shit together, if I were to keep this up!

"Well, I would love to! It would be fun. We can exchange numbers if you want," I said, smiling at him, as I walked back towards the changing rooms. I did notice the way his eyes looked at my behind, and I could feel the usual insecurity rise in my chest, clenching my heart uncomfortably. I knew this feeling. That was the feeling I'd had every time a boy had tried getting close to me. Well, besides Damon of course. But I had to change! I had to do this. I needed to do this. So, what if Damon wasn't going to be my first kiss... Maybe, I should just stop waiting for him to come around. No, I couldn't let him go. Not yet. I had to give Caroline's plan a shot. I just had to.

"Sure."  
We exchanged numbers, he left, and I was alone with a very mad Caroline.

"Just what do you think you're doing?! I mean, he's hot and all, but hello! Blue eyes SEX-GOD waiting for you! I thought you were going after him! What happened?" she asked, looking at me, as if I had just kissed a criminal. I sighed and walked into the changing room, putting on my normal clothes.

"I'm still following your plan, Care... Don't worry. I just got caught up. And I need some practice, right? I mean, could it hurt?" I ask, trying not to notice just how different I was sounding. This wasn't like me at all!

"I am calling Damon right now, and then we're going out with him and Damon. You are not going to lunch with that guy. We're going to be having fun, and you're going to make Damon wish you were his with that dress!"

I knew there was no way to change her new plan. She wasn't going to let this go. And frankly, that was probably for the best.

* * *

Damon and I were casually strolling down the streets of LA. We had eaten lunch together, and then Caroline and Matt had gone to do some couple stuff, that neither Damon nor I wanted to be a part of.

Hence the reason we were walking down the street, his arm around my shoulders, as if we were a couple. Once again, I found myself liking the feeling. I had no idea just why he had started doing that, but I wasn't complaining. Not at all, actually.

We'd been looking at the cute shops all day, walking around in LA, as if we were the couple we looked like. I hadn't missed the looks we'd gotten from people. It was clear we looked like a happy couple, enjoying Cali. There were so many things I wanted to see, but we wouldn't be able to do that in one day. We needed a lot more time. I was going to drag Damon back here, whether he liked it or not.

"What's that?" I asked, pointing to a darker shop. It was standing out from the others, without any clothes in the windows, and without the same bright colors.

"Think it's a tattoo parlor," he smirked at me, "you interested?"

And as that sentence left his mouth, I actually thought about it. A tattoo would be cool. Hadn't Damon and I agreed to seize the day? Take chances, and let this be the summer of our lives? A tattoo would be a perfect way to do just that.

"Yeah! Come on, let's do it!" I started walking to the shop, leaving Damon standing startled behind me.

After a few seconds he was following me across the street.

"I was joking, Lena," he said, laughing slightly. I looked at him over my shoulder, a smile playing at my lips.

"Well, I'm not! Seize the day…remember, Damon?" I said. I really wanted him come with me.  
I already knew what could be perfect for us. On the other hand, I could understand if he wasn't keen on the whole, putting ink in your body.

"Fine. But just so you know, those things are permanent," he said, walking over to the shop with me. I laughed and turned to him, stopping right in front of the parlor.

"What, are you scared? Maybe this isn't something you're brave enough to do?" I said, teasing

him.

"Oh, please," he held up his arm, "I beat you to this one, sweetheart."  
His "Hic et nunc" tattoo flashed at me from his forearm. I'd loved it ever since he got it, but I'd never told him.

"Yeah, yeah, so you got a tattoo when you were drunk in college, this is different!" I smirked. We were bantering, teasing each other, just like we always had. And I felt comfortable. _This _was comfortable. This was _us_. I realized then that whatever I had been doing with Mason meant nothing. Damon was still everything I wanted. The only man I wanted.

"Oh, you are on, Gilbert," Damon laughed, "let's go get inked."

We walked inside, him right next to me. Of course he wasn't going to leave my side. And he was actually getting tattooed, just like me. What had I done to deserve to have someone like him in my life?

The place was pretty much what I expected a tattoo shop to look like. The guy behind the desk actually looked pretty normal. Sure, he had tattoos on his arms, but wasn't as threatening as they always seemed on TV. He smiled as soon as we stepped inside.

"Hey guys, what can we do for you?" he asked, putting away the magazine he'd been reading.  
I smiled at him, looking first at Damon, and then back at the guy.

"I think we're going to get a tattoo."

"Both of you?" The guy asked, "you're getting names?"  
Damon and I both gave him a confused look. What the hell was he talking about?

"Names?"

The man nodded at us.

"Yeah, most of the couples that come in here are wanting each other's names tattooed on."  
I bit my lip, feeling my cheeks turning red.

"Oh, no, no, we aren't, I mean, he's not my-"

Damon saved me from the embarrassment.

"Nah, I don't think I could go my whole life with her name tattooed on me. But, I'm letting her down easy."

He threw me a teasing grin, and I laughed.

"Screw you, Damon. What makes you think I'd want your name on me?"

"Oh, you would just love to screw me!" he said, making me blush fiercely. If only he knew...  
He shrugged, still smiling, looking back at the guy.

"Thanks, but we're still deciding. I just didn't want the little one here to get scared, when she goes under the needle."  
I nudged him in the ribs. He didn't even flinch.  
"Ah," the guy chuckled, "first timer here, huh?"  
Damon nodded and the guy winked at me.

"Well, we'll take care of you honey. Yo, David!" he called back to a guy who was tattooing someone in the back of the room. I was going to be sitting there in a few minutes. Oh God, did I really want to do this?  
Hell yeah.

"Yeah, what's up?" The guy answered.

"We got a virgin up here!"

Damon, and the David guy chuckled, and I blushed red. What did that have to do with this? How did he even…

"So where's yours?" The guy asked Damon.  
Damon lifted his arm to show him.

"Hic et nunc?" The guy raised a brow, looking questioning at Damon.

"Here and now, man," Damon smirked.

"Nice," the guy nodded, then looked back down at me, "okay baby, ready to lose your V-card?"

My eyes widened, "W-what?"

Loose my virginity? _Here? _What the hell was going on in his mind. And why the hell wasn't Damon doing anything?

"You ready to get inked?" The guy asked, raising one eyebrow at me.

"I…oh," I blushed harder, as understanding hit me, "yeah, I think so."

"Alright, well, I'm Raymond. You can go look around, we got some books over there, and some examples set up, see what you like and give me a holler when you decide on something."

I nodded, "Okay, thank you."  
He left us to our own then, and I turned to Damon. He was laughing so hard.

"You really thought they were talking about sex? You thought you were going to loose your virginity in a tattoo shop!" His face was red from laughing. I smacked him on the arm, blushing even harder. I'd hoped he didn't notice.

"Well, how should I know, huh, Mr. Already Tattoed?" I said, trying to hide just how embarrassed I was, "so, you really want to do this?"

He nodded, getting his laughing under control.

"Yeah, as long as you're okay with it, I'm cool."  
I smiled at him.

"Okay, well I have an idea…I just want to make sure that you're okay with it."

"Yeah, lay it on me!" he said, sitting down on a couch, grabbing one of the books. God, he looked good.

"Carpe Diem."  
He raised his brow, with a smirk.

"Seize the day, huh?"

I returned his smile.

"It is our whole new philosophy, is it not?"

"I guess it is," he chuckled, "so, where exactly do you suppose we get it?"

I thought for a second.

"Um…I'm not really sure…"  
He considered this, then held up his pinkie finger.

"On our finger?" I asked, my nose crinkling a bit.

He smiled.

"Well it was a promise to ourselves, wasn't it?"

I smirked.

"Pinkie promises…I like it."

"Well alright then," he agreed, standing up from the couch and wrapping his arm around my shoulders, "let's go look around and find a font you like."

I nodded, letting him lead me to the back of the room."

* * *

Several minutes later, everything was ready. Damon had agreed to go first, and was sitting down in the chair Raymond had pointed to.

"You know, you can't back out, now," Damon warned, throwing me a glance.

"I wasn't planning on it," I assured him.

Raymond came over then, with an extra chair for me to sit on, and took a seat in his own chair.

"Okay, you ready?"

Damon nodded, and held out his hand. I felt a little nervous, watching it, but entranced at the same time. I was worried about the pain, but Damon didn't even flinch when the man started. It was amazing how Raymond was able to trace out the words perfectly, and the black swirling letters looked beautiful against Damon's skin.

My excitement enhanced.

"It doesn't hurt, does it?" I asked.

Damon shrugged slightly.

"Nah. It's just a little sting, and you get numb to it after a few seconds."

I nodded, seeing that he truly looked unaffected by the pain. Maybe it really wasn't that bad.

* * *

It took Raymond a few minutes to finish up with Damon, and I let my mind roam as I waited. It was pretty awesome that Damon agreed to get a tattoo; a permanent, on you for the rest of your life, never getting rid of, tattoo, just because I wanted it. He truly was the best friend I'd ever had. Which made me fall in love with him all the more.

My stomach knotted up.

There was probably little that Damon wouldn't do for me, yet he was killing me, and he didn't even know it. How messed up was the universe, that it would put me through this. Give me this amazing guy in my life, who loved me and protected me…like a sister.  
It just wasn't fair, which made me think that this plan of Caroline's just had to work. Damon needed to realize that there was more to me.

Lately, I'd catch his lingering gaze, and think that maybe it was working, but then, at other times, he was completely the same, and I felt totally friend-zoned.

Well, if this trip didn't work out, I was just going to have to get over it. Damon was a good friend to me, and I was just going to have to learn to be happy with that. He's still in my life after all, and that meant a lot. But, unfortunately, it wasn't nearly enough.

"All done," Raymond announced, pulling me from my thoughts. Damon admired the job before showing me.

"What do you think?"

I smiled at the words etched into his finger.

"It's perfect." I said, looking into his amazingly blue eyes.

"I think so too," he agreed, shaking Raymond's hand.

"This is awesome, man."

"Thanks," Raymond smiled, "okay pretty lady, your next… Just let me wrap this up."

He proceeded to tie some kind of clear wrap around Damon's finger, and taped it off.

"This is just for protection. You should leave it on for tonight, just in case. You know how it works." Damon nodded.

"Will do."

We switched seats then, and I was suddenly glad we had decided on a small tattoo. Not that I should be nervous, but the idea of a needle repeatedly stabbing my skin sort of gave me chills. Suck it up, I told myself, this isn't a big deal. Still, I was thankful when Damon reached over and grabbed my free hand.

"You'll be fine, Lena. Just relax."

"Yeah, it's not that bad, sweetie," Raymond agreed, "just little pinches."

"Comforting," I smirked, and the two men chuckled.

Raymond had exchanged the needles, and got everything set, "okay, you ready?"

I nodded, looking at Damon. I'd just focus on him for the moment, and maybe it wouldn't hurt very much. He was always able to make me happy.  
Raymond lifted my hand, and I felt his grip enclose around my finger, probably afraid I'd jolt. I heard the tattoo gun start, and took a breath. When it first touched my skin, I hissed, but managed to stay still. It did sting, pretty bad, but they were right, it wasn't unbearable.

"Just breath," Damon instructed, and I nodded, doing as he said. He knew how to calm me down. He always did.

"See, not so bad," Raymond encouraged, "and it'll be over in no time."

I smiled, glad that we had ended up with him instead of some cold stranger.

"Yeah it's alright," I said, looking at Damon. He squeezed the hand that he was holding, and I settled back into the seat.

* * *

I was still admiring my tattoo, when we arrived back at the house. Damon laughed as he held the door open for me.

"You know, it's going to be there for the rest of your life. You don't have to keep looking at it. It won't magically disappear," he said, teasing.

I rolled my eyes playfully.

"Hey, I paid for it, I can look at it if I want." He smiled, but was wise enough not to comment. I moved to the kitchen, looking for something to snack on, as Caroline came skipping down the stairs.

"There you guys are! I was wondering if you were going to show up soon! I've been waiting!" she said, smiling big at us.

"Hello to you too, Blondie," Damon shook his head, moving to lean against the counter. Caroline stuck her tongue out at him, but didn't lose her focus.

"So, it feels amazing outside, and Matt and I thought it would be a good idea to cook dinner on the grill! You know, the one out on the patio! So we need to go and get some meat, a few drinks, and we can eat and chill by the pool. The lights out there will be enough to see by."

"Sounds good," I reasoned, and it actually did. The weather was pretty perfect tonight.

"Awesome!" Caroline grinned, "but we still have to run down to the store and get some meat, I'm thinking burgers, maybe some barbeque ribs, hot dogs, oh, and the alcohol. Which means that you have to come, Mr. Over-21." She shot a glance at Damon, who groaned.

"Take the Quarterback."

"He's in the shower," Caroline told him, "and we need to leave now, because we still have to get the stuff, start up the girl, prepare the potato salad, and-"  
"Wait," I interrupted, "potato salad, too?"  
"Yees," she droned, "I picked up that stuff earlier, but it has to be made. So we need to hurry!"

I chuckled at her. She was clearly beginning to be frustrated and totally stressed out.

"Okay, why don't you and Damon run to the store to get the meat and the drinks. I'll stay here and make the potato salad, and when Matt's done with his shower, I'll have him fire up the grill," I said, shrugging. Easy like that.  
Caroline considered my proposition for a while, then nodded.

"Okay, good. Perfect! Let's go, Salvatore!" She was already on her way to the door, as Damon threw me an accusing glare.  
I smiled and waved at them. She was going to give him a hard time.

"Have fun."

* * *

It took barely any time at all for me to finish mixing the potato salad, and put it in the refrigerator to cool. Matt was still in the shower, and I had nothing else to do, so I stepped outside. The air was warm, with a light breeze coming in from the ocean.

I moved to the stairs of the porch, sitting down, and looking up at the sky. So many stars shined back down at me, that it made me feel like I was in a fairytale. But the truth of the matter, is that life isn't a fairytale. Happy endings don't just fall in your lap. That just isn't how things worked in the real world.

I looked down at my tattoo again. A part of me knew that in getting this tattoo, I was putting a lot more than ink under my skin. I was putting Damon under my skin. Every time I looked at it, I would remember him, and remember this trip.

But maybe that was a good thing. Because this trip was changing me, making me break out of my shell a bit. Hell, I'd gotten a stranger's number today! But none of it meant anything to me, if I didn't get Damon.

I sighed, leaning my head against the rail. So many years, I've wasted, pining for him in silence, and he was completely unaware. I moved my gaze from my tattoo, to my scars. They were so faded that they barely even existed anymore. Each little line etched there was proof of my tears, my heartbreaks, the numerous nights I'd been forced to watch Damon love others. The pain on my skin had been easier to deal with than the pain in my heart. The pain of knowing that Damon was wrapped in the arms of other women across the hall, while I was completely, depressingly alone.

I tried not to let my eyes well up with tears for the past, but I was unable to stop it. Just remembering how much it hurt. But again, that had changed. Since being in California, I finally felt as though I had Damon to myself. Like he was really seeing me.

But things were always changing, and this could too. When we got back home, he might start jumping right back into those whore's beds. I'd be right back where I was, crying myself to sleep, with the blood dripping down my arm.

I closed my eyes as more tears escaped.

I didn't want to be that girl, anymore! I didn't! But in a way, it felt inevitable. Like there was nothing I could do to stop it.

* * *

"Elena?"

I jumped at the voice, and spun around to see Matt standing in the door way, freshly dressed, with damp hair.

"Oh, hey…I didn't hear you come out," I said, looking down at the tiles.

He nodded, walking closer to me.

"Are you okay?"

I shrugged and looked up at him. I was so used to just telling people off, tell them I was fine. But maybe that was one the things that needed to change.

"Yes…No…Not sure."

It was obvious that he'd noticed me crying, so lying it off would be pointless. Maybe I should just open up to him. He took a seat next to me, on the steps.

"You want to talk about it?" he asked, looking at me with a worried look. He actually worried about me.

I considered his question. Did I want to talk about it? Maybe if he was Caroline…but then I already knew what she would say. Something along the lines of "Just stay positive", or "These things take time". Maybe a fresh perspective would be helpful.

"You sure you want to take on my emotional drama?" I asked, trying to keep the mood somewhat light. Matt gave me a small smile.

"Yeah, I think I can handle it."

I nodded, taking a deep breath. I was actually confiding in someone that wasn't Caroline.

"Have Caroline ever talked to you about me…and Damon?"

He shook his head, looking a bit confused.

"No, not really…" I was a little surprised, and proud, of my best friend for being so loyal with my secrets. Everyone knew she was a gossip girl, and I wouldn't be surprised if she had told Matt everything going on with me and Damon. But she hadn't.

"Well it's a bit of a story," I said trailing it out. He could still get out if he wanted. He didn't need to hear about everything going on.

"I'm not going anywhere," he promised.

I nodded once again, and prepared my self for telling him everything.

"Okay, well, I guess it starts with me. I got really messed up, after mine and Damon's parents died, and Damon…he really helped me through that time," Matt nodded, but didn't comment, which pressed me to continue, "as you know, Aunt Jenna and Ric took us in, but Damon was the only one who really got me, who understood what I was feeling. He was my best friend. But over the years…I sort of ended up falling for him."

"Easy to understand," Matt reasoned, "he's the one who's always been there." I nodded with a small smile on my lips.

"Yeah, he is. But as we got older, Damon started sleeping around and when I graduated and moved in with him, he brought all these different girls home…and it just…"

"Sucked?" Matt asked.

"Pretty much," I agreed with a sigh, "it hurt. Like I was losing him, or didn't matter as much."

"I'm sure that's not the case," he offered.

"Maybe not. I mean, I know that Damon cares about me…but it isn't the same. I love him, Matt. Being with him…it consumes me, and no matter what I do, I can't shake him." I felt tears starting to form in my eyes again. Matt nodded.

"Once you love someone, I don't think you can ever shake them." I huffed and looked at him.

"Unfortunately, that's probably right. But it doesn't change anything. All these years I've spent, hurting over this, feeling completely lost, and alone…I just don't know how to be okay anymore."

He smiled kindly at me.

"Well, I think you've been doing a pretty good job so far." I looked into his soft blue eyes, feeling a smile form on my lips.

"This past week has been different… Being here has been different. It's like I can forget who I use to be." He nodded.

"Yeah, I noticed the change." He motioned to my clothes and I smiled a little.

"Yeah, that was Caroline's idea. She decided that I had lagged long enough, and that if I ever wanted a chance with Damon, I was going to have to open up."

"Yeah, sounds like Caroline," Matt joked. I nodded.

"Yeah, and she was right, I think. Damon has seemed to notice me a lot more since we've been here… And I've been happier. I'm just afraid that when it's all over, things will go back to how they were… And I'm not sure if I can handle that… That I'll go back to my old habits." His brows furrowed.

"What do you mean?" I took a deep breath. No one except for Caroline knew about my cutting… But maybe opening up would help get it off my chest. Slowly, I turned my arms over. Matt studied them for a moment, then realization dawned on his face.

"Elena…" I exhaled.

"I know, I know. It's a bad habit, and I shouldn't hurt myself, and there's more to life, and so on. I get it. Caroline already told me off." The concern didn't leave his face.

"I'm sorry that you've had to live with this," he said, looking at my arm again. I shrugged.

"It's gotten better, I guess… Just please, don't say anything to anyone, especially Damon. I have no idea how I could tell him about this. I mean it's just that-"

"Elena," Matt interrupted, "it's okay. I won't say anything. Promise."

I sighed gratefully, "okay, thank you." He nodded, placing an arm around my shoulders.

"You're my friend, Elena. And I'm here for you." I leaned against him.

"Thanks Matt." He kissed my head gently.

"It's no problem. I'm just glad you told me. And I'm sure that things will turn out alright."

"I hope so."

We were interrupted then.

"Hey Quarterback! I could use your help with these bags!"

I looked over to see Damon staring at us, holding a handful of groceries, Caroline coming up behind him. I hadn't even heard them pull up. We both stood and walked over toward him.

"Here," Damon practically growled, pushing one handful of the bags against Matt's chest. Matt took them, proceeding to carry them inside, Damon's eyes following him. My eyebrows furrowed at the look he was giving. He was staring at Matt with a heated gaze, a murderous scowl on his lips. Why was he suddenly so pissed at Matt?

"You okay?" I asked, seeming to catch his attention. He glanced down at me.

"Yeah…I'm fine."

Then he turned, taking the bags into the house. I shook my head, wondering if I'd ever fully understand that man.

* * *

**So there you have it! PLEASE leave a comment, telling me what you think! I am THRILLED about the amounts of reviews, and I can't believe all of them are positive! It's amazing! Thank you SO much! **

**Until next time! **


	15. Chapter 15

**Okay, there's not much to say... I just really really hope you like this! Read on!**

* * *

**Chapter 15: Damon**

Finding Elena and Matt standing that close, him kissing her forehead pretty much ruined my mood. I didn't let it show, when we were sitting at the dinner table. But as soon as Caroline and Matt stepped inside, Elena was trying to make conversation, and I just didn't feel like it. She wasn't the one doing anything wrong, but I was still pretty mad. Why couldn't she just get her eyes open and see me? We would be so much better, than she would ever be with the blonde quarterback. And he had Caroline. Why would she go and steal her best friend's boyfriend?

"Thanks for doing this with me today," she said, holding her finger up. The plastic looked awkward at her hand. It didn't fit her, to be wrapped up like that. I couldn't wait for her to take it off.

"Mhm," I said, grabbing the plates, to carry it all inside. I'd worked at The Grill for a few years, back in high school, when I needed the money. Of course Jenna and Ric was there, and they wouldn't mind giving me the money I needed, but I felt like I should earn them my self.

"What's wrong, Damon? You've been acting weird ever since you and Caroline came back. What's going on?" she asked, putting the glass she was holding down on the table. Okay, apparently I hadn't hid it well enough during our dinner.

"Nothing's wrong, Lena. Let's get these inside."  
I turned around without another word, and walked to the kitchen with the plates. Of course Caroline and Matt were sitting on the couch making out, as soon as I stepped inside. Elena was still outside, and I wanted to tell Matt off right away. I wanted to confront him about Elena being way too good for him, and that he should just stick with Blondie. But I really didn't want to do it in front of Caroline. She already knew way too much.

That's why I completely ignored them, and walked to the kitchen, hurrying through the dishes. When Elena came into the room, her head was lowered and she seemed almost afraid of me. She didn't say a word as she placed some of the dirty dishes on the table, and went to leave the room. But I didn't let her.

I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her close to my body.

"Sorry, Lena. I was just in a bad mood. I didn't mean to be like that," I said, burying my nose in her hair. God, her hair smelled so good. She smelled so good. And she felt so good in my arms. I could hold her like this for the rest of my life.

"It's fine, Damon."

Her small arms went around my waist, hugging me close. I smiled at her, tugging a piece of hair behind her ear, as she looked up at me.

"Go in and have fun with Barbie and Ken. I'll stay here and do the dishes," I said, placing a kiss on her forehead. That was my thing. Not Matt's. I was the only one allowed to do that. Elena was _my _girl.

"You sure?" she asked, raising her eyebrows. I nodded and smiled at her. Then I unwrapped my arms and let her go. As soon as she was gone, I let out a huge sigh, and returned to the dishes.

As soon as I was done, I made my way down to the room Elena had shown me. I needed to play.

I wanted to get all of my frustrations out, and I couldn't og down to the local fitness, as I used to do when my mood was like that.

Luckily for me, there was a piano, and I'd had the beginning of a new song running through my head, ever since we got that tattoo together. Now would be a great time to get it written down om paper.

As I stepped into the room, I noticed sheet paper on the small table and a pencil right next to it. Perfect! I grabbed both items, and sat down at the piano, beginning to work on the new song. Of course Elena had once again been my inspiration, of course. She had been so many times. And I'd never told her. No matter what happened, I was going to let her know, when we came home. She had to at least know about my feelings, even if she was in love with Matt. I had to tell her.

My fingers were sliding over the keys, and I enjoyed the feeling, combined with the sound. This wasn't like any other thing I'd written. But I liked it. And I really hoped Elena was going to like it. It was written for her, after all.

It wasn't hard for me to get it finished. It seemed like the words just flowed from the pen, as I worked on the sheet. It took a maximum of 30 minutes for me to have it finished. I'd never written anything that fast before. But there it was, right in front of me.

* * *

"What's up, children? Are you behaving yourselves?" I asked, as I walked outside the patio. Caroline and Matt seemed to be all over each other, sharing one chair and Elena was sitting with a bottle of bourbon in her hand. _My _bourbon. Oh well, I guess she could have it. Drunken Elena was fun after all. Maybe she would finally admit she was in love with the jerk, so I could tell her just how bad he would be for her. Tell her about the drugs him and the other football guys were doing. And maybe, just maybe, I could try to make her understand that I was interested in her. She didn't really seem like she was getting my hints. Sure, she had been flirting back a couple of times, but it never seemed like she was serious.

"I am. Those two... Not so sure," Elena said, nodding towards Caroline and Matt. Caroline was in his lap, currently licking his skull clean. God, couldn't they just go upstairs and get it over with? Did we really have to watch them fuck with clothes on?

Caroline finally pulled away and looked at me with a dazed expression. She'd clearly had a lot more to drink than Elena had.

"We are behaving! Now, go over to Lena and keep her company." The blonde girl sat down next to her boyfriend and looked at us, "now that Damon got us booze, let's have some fun!"

I rolled my eyes. What could she possibly think of us to do? Right now she was drunk as a skunk, Elena seemed to be on the way, and Matt and I were both pretty sober.

"And what do you suggest we do, to have fun?" Elena asked from her chair. She was curled up in the chair, looking like a small girl with a bottle of booze.

"Let's play never, never have I ever! It'll be fun, and we'll get to know each other better!" Caroline said. I groaned. Really, never, never have I ever?

"Come on! I'll start! Never have I ever had sex in the water!" she said. I sat down next to Elena, grabbed the bottle from her grip and took a swig. Surprisingly enough, Matt also drank from a bottle he'd found on the floor.

Okay, Caroline and I'd maybe bought a little too much alcohol. I had totally forgotten about the alcohol I'd bought in the airport, still tucked safely in my suitcase upstairs. So, here we were, Barbie and Ken sharing one bottle, Elena and I sharing another.

"Never have I ever skinny dipped," Matt said, shrugging from the couch. Once again I took a swig from the bottle. Thank God I wasn't a lightweight. I'd probably tried every single thing those two had done. Hell, I'd probably tried double amount of what they had tried.

"Never have I ever... Uhm, received anal," I said, trying to figure out something I hadn't done. Of course I hadn't done _that. _I was _way _too straight for stuff like that. I couldn't keep my mouth from dropping, when Caroline took a large swig from her bottle.

"Blondie? Seriously? Who the hell did that?" I asked, unable to keep my self from asking. Matt sure didn't seem like the guy to get kinky with his girlfriend. Her ex-boyfriend, Tyler, might have, though. Matt awkwardly put his hand up in the air, as his face turned red. _Seriously?! _

It was bad enough knowing both of them had sex every night and I didn't. But they were going kinky? Come on!

"Let's not talk about that any more. Elena, your turn," Caroline said, looking at her best friend. I knew instantly that Elena would have lot's to chose from, but wouldn't be able to say something remotely dirty. She just wasn't that kind of girl. I was pretty sure she didn't think boys were disgusting and stuff like that, but she was still pretty innocent.

"Never have I ever... Kissed someone I didn't like..." she said, looking very insecure. But her gaze kept darting to me. I frowned a bit and took a big gulp from the bottle. Had I ever kissed a girl I actually liked? Like, really liked? I didn't think so. Most girls had just been a quick drunk fuck. I hadn't even had a girlfriend, to be honest. If I got Elena, she would be my first girlfriend.

Matt and Caroline also drank, but didn't look like they found everything special. Maybe I was just being paranoid.

"Well, as much fun as I think this will be, I'm going to go to bed now. We're still going to that club tomorrow night, right Caroline?" I asked, not really expecting a clear answer. She was pretty gone in the alcohol.

"Yeah, of course we are! I got her a dress, and it fits her perfectly! Mason said so!" she said, giggling lightly, "oooh, Elena, we have to invite him to the club! He has to go with us!"

I narrowed my eyes at Elena. She lowered her head, and made sure she looked everywhere but me. Who the fucking hell was Mason?

"Sure... I'll call him tomorrow," she said, still avoiding looking at me. I felt jealousy and rage boil in the pit of my stomach. I felt like tracking down this Mason person and rip his head off.

Wow, what the hell was going on with my mind? Sure, I was protective of Elena, and I wanted her to my self. But this was getting extreme. Maybe it had something to do with the alcohol.

"He _soooo _liked you! Oh my God, he was totally smitten!" Caroline said, giggling. I raised an eyebrow and Elena was still looking away.

"Nah, I don't think so. He's a guy," Elena said, shrugging and taking another swig from the bottle. Those two were hiding from me. I was sure. But I had no idea what it was they were hiding. They'd been secretive during the whole trip.

"Oh yes! You two would be really cute together!" Caroline said, taking another drink from her bottle of tequila. Great, Blondie, more alcohol!

"I thought you didn't like him?" Elena said, still avoiding me at all costs.

"I didn't, but then I thought about it, and he's hot, and you don't have a boyfriend, so I don't see why you shouldn't go for him!" Okay, that was enough!

"So, is this Mason guy someone you'd like to tell me about, Elena?" I asked, trying to get her attention. My whole body was flaming with anger, and I just wanted to take her to the bedroom and keep her to my self for the rest of my life. Away from all of those assholes that would only hurt her.

"It's nothing..." she said, looking down at her fingers.

"Oh, maybe you have actually kissed someone already! Because you wouldn't tell me if you did, right? And Mason seems like a perfect choice, huh? You know what, just stay down here and talk with those two. They seem to be the only ones you trust."

I turned around and hurried to our room, smacking the door loudly. What the hell had gotten me to react this way?! I'd never yelled at her like that before! I hadn't even looked at her. And she hadn't looked at me. What the hell was going on with me?

I ripped my clothes off, putting on a pair of sweats and laying down in bed. The small book on the bed table reminded me of our bet. Had she written in her journal every day? Maybe I should check it... I mean, it wouldn't be hard to find. Just check if she had written...

No!

I couldn't invade her privacy like that. She trusted me, and now I wanted to ruin that? More than I had already, anyway.

* * *

It had been about fifteen minutes since I'd turned off the lights, when I heard the door open. I heard Elena's careful steps as she walked inside, and I immediately felt guilty. I had yelled at her, and now she was tip toeing, to be sure I didn't wake up. Why the hell had I freaked like that?

I heard her silently take off her clothes and put on _my _t-shirt and sweats, before laying down in the bed. A minute later, I heard the sobs starting to escape her lips, and I couldn't hold my self back.

I turned around and wrapped my arms around her small frame, bringing her close to my body.

"I'm so sorry, Lena. I don't know why I said that. I didn't mean it. I promise. I'm so, so, so sorry." I buried my nose in the crook of her neck, smelling her hair and feeling her perfect body against mine. She didn't answer, but her sobs were clear.

I carefully turned her around, so that she was facing me, and pressed a kiss to her forehead. She looked unbelievably hurt. And that was my fault. I never wanted to see her like that! I was trying to get her away from Matt, because he would only hurt her, and here I was, hurting her.

"I'm so sorry. Please, forgive me. I can't loose you, Lena... I just can't," I said, feeling very vulnerable. She knew exactly what she meant to me, but I'd never said anything like this to her before. I'd never have to, before that moment, because I'd never hurt her before.

"It's okay, Damon... I know, it's fine," she said and buried her head in my chest. I sighed with relief and pulled her closer.

"I love you, Lena. And I wouldn't know what to do without you..."

If only she knew just how much I loved her.

* * *

Matt and I were standing by the door,_ still_ waiting for the girls to come down. They had already spent nearly three hours upstairs, getting ready, and I couldn't even protest properly, because Blondie had insisted that we guys wait downstairs for them. I was half tempted to go make myself another drink, but I doubt Elena would appreciate me getting wasted before we even made it to the club. And surprisingly, she had seemed pretty excited about going…Maybe because of this new Mason guy. I wondered if she really was going to invite him, or if she was just saying that for Blondie's sake.

Either way, this guy wasn't the biggest issue. I looked over at the Quarterback, and rolled my eyes. I had my work cut out for me.

A few minutes later, Caroline called down that they were ready, and she and Elena emerged at the top of the stairs. My mouth dropped, and it took me a moment to figure out how to close it again.

Elena looked stunning. Absolutely amazing. Her dress was absolutely delicious, as it hugged her beautiful body perfectly, allowing me see every single curve as she made her way down the stairs, and came to a stop next to me. Her hair was falling down over one shoulder and she was wearing some pretty high heels, putting her at the height of my eyes.

As her eyes caught mine, she blushed, but didn't look away.

I could almost swear that I saw something glimmering in her eyes, a deep feeling of some kind.

I could only wish that it was something she felt for me, but clearly, that wasn't the case.

I had seen her with Matt yesterday evening, after all. It was pretty damn clear that she was in love with him, not me. Obvious as hell, the way he was holding her close, and kissing on her, and it's not like she was complaining.

The more I thought about what I had seen, the more annoyed I got.

I was the only one allowed to do that, the only one allowed to hold her!

Matt was all wrong for her, and I couldn't just give up! No matter what she felt for him, I had try.

She smiled at me, then, so I took her hand and kissed her knuckles. A blush lighting up in her cheeks. God, she looked beautiful.

"Are you ladies ready to go?" I asked, wrapping my arm possessively around Elena's waist.

She smiled at me and rested her head on my shoulder.

"I am. How about you, Care?" Caroline nodded, and pressed her lips on Matts. I tried not to pay attention to Elena's reaction. I'd had enough of her obvious love for the quarterback.

I just wanted her to be mine. And she was going to be. We walked outside, slowly making our way down the street. I could already spot the club she had been talking about. There seemed to be a lot of people already, which could only mean we were going to have a fun night.

* * *

This night officially sucked. I was sitting at the bar, nursing a glass of bourbon, while I watched Elena and Matt dance. His hand were all of the wrong places, and he was way too close to her. I knew he was drunk. We'd been doing shots, and that boy can't take nearly as much as he thought he could. I felt like ripping him to pieces.

Couldn't he see that Elena was vulnerable?

She had been drinking, and her eyes kept looking around, giving me the feeling that she was uncomfortable with the situation.

But, of course she was uncomfortable!

His hands were way too low on her waist, and he was too close to her.

Elena didn't like when boys came that close. Or at least she didn't use to.

But right, I forgot that this was her precious Matt, and that probably changed things.

Fuck that. I was the only one allowed to get that close to her.

Hell, I'd have her as close to my body as possible, without actually being joined in the most intimate way. And I'm sure she would let me. Because unlike the Quarterback, I knew her. I'd been there through her life, and she knew she could trust me.

I downed the rest of my drink, and saw Matt making his way to the bar.

Perfect.

Now I could have the conversation I wanted to have with him. I don't care what Elena felt for him, he was with Blondie, and would just string my girl along. And Elena deserved a hell of a lot better than that!

I walked up behind him, and grabbed his shoulder, pulling him out a side door, into an alley, ignoring his protests and comments.

"What the hell, Damon?" He shot, as I let him go.

"You and I need to have a little chat," I stated, my voice dead serious.

His brows furrowed, "What's your deal, man?"

"The deal, Matt, is that I'm only going to say this once, so you had better listen close. Stay away from Elena."

His clear shock would have humored me, if I wasn't already annoyed with him.

"Elena…? Why? What's the-"

I grabbed his shoulder, tightening my grip enough to make him wince, "Look, I know that Elena has some kind of feelings for you, but I'll be damn if I let you lead her on like that. She is too good for you. So you need to back the hell off, and leave her alone."

He smirked slightly, and I felt the urge to lay him out, "Damon, I know Elena…and she doesn't have feelings for-"

"You don't know a damn thing about her!" I hissed, "Elena came here to have fun, not to get groped by the guy who's dating her best friend. Speaking of which, I doubt Caroline would appreciate how close you were to Elena out there."

"Dude, this has nothing to do-"

"Shut up," I warned him, "I'm not done. Nor do I really care about yours and Blondie's relationship. What I care about is Elena. And I'm not going to let you hurt her. So if you're into her, you better tell me straight, because I'm not going to let her be used by some two-timing jock that only wants in her pants.

Matt stood his ground, "I don't want Elena."

"Good," I let him go, "Because she can do a hell of a lot better than you."

Now that I was through threatening him, I felt angry.

Actually, I was more than just angry. I was protective, I was sad, and I just wanted to take Elena home and hold her in my arms. I wanted to keep her away from all of the boys out there, because none of them would ever be good enough to deserve her.

They'd hurt her, and I would never allow that.

She deserved the best of the best, and Matt didn't fill that quota.

The quarterback lifted his hands, defensively, "Wow. Dude, chill out….Elena's not in love with me."

I shook my head, "You don't see what I see."

He looked me in the eyes, "Damon. I swear to you, Elena is not in love with me."

He was really starting to get on my nerves, "The hell she isn't. This entire trip, she's been different. She's dressing more revealing, and flirting, and being emotional. Something is going on! But you're screwing Caroline, and Elena's too nice to move in on her friend's guy, so she's having to deal with it, and I'm not going to let you play her."

Matt shook his head, a humorless chuckle escaped his mouth, "Man, you really have no idea, do you?"

I raised my brow, "No idea about what?"

"About Elena," he stated, his eyebrows lifted. I frowned even deeper and shook my head.

"What about her, Matt? You need to speak clearly here, because my patience is below zero right now."

He sighed, "She's totally in love with you, man. Has been for years."

I blinked. What? She was in love with me? No, that couldn't be... Surely I would have noticed... Wouldn't I?

"No," I shook my head, talking more to myself than him, "She's been…this entire…wait, I saw you two all cozy on the porch, and you were-"

"Talking about you," Matt interjected, "She was upset because she wasn't sure if you felt the same for her as she did for you, and she really didn't want me to say anything, but, after this, I kind of figured you have it just as bad for her, so…"

I processed his words, and suddenly, things started making sense. The make-over, the attitude change, the crying…how she never wanted to talk to me about it.

The way she blushed whenever I flirted with her, or jokingly pretended to strangers that she was my girlfriend, and the way she held my hand like she never wanted to let go.

I swallowed, as my mind drifted back even further. All those nights she would crawl into my bed, wanting me to hold her, or wouldn't look me in the eyes on a morning after I had…company.

Shit.

Here I was chewing out Matt, and the whole time, I'd been the one hurting her.

Fuck!

I needed to find her. I needed to find her right now.

**Okay, I know some of you have wanted to kill me during the last chapters, so I really hope this is something you liked? A BIG thanks to my AMAZING beta _Foreverfirstloves. _This chapter would NOT be here without her! **

**Okay, please leave a review ! Really, it would mean the world to me. And I already have chapter 16 ready! So you'll see when I post it, ehehe! Maybe 2 days time? **

**I'll see you next time, dear readers! **


	16. Chapter 16

**Okay, I know I said 2 days, but... Well, I couldn't help my self, so SURPRISE! **

* * *

**Chapter 16: Elena**

It had been a long time since I'd had this much fun. The alcohol was rushing through my blood, making me feel far more confident than I really should be. I felt like I was on top of the world. No one could reach me.

Caroline had forced me to do at least 5 shots, and surprisingly enough I hadn't rejected her idea. The music was loud, there was free alcohol and I enjoyed my self. The bass was pumping in tact with my heart, making me feel wilder and crazy than I had for a long time.

Somewhere along the way, we had lost Damon and Matt. None of us had any idea where the hell they were, and something told me to just let it go. Be bold, as Caroline had told me. I had waited for Damon for so long. Why should I keep on waiting? He clearly didn't want me. We had been here for a week, and he hadn't made a move towards me. Just why should I waste my time?

"_All my life I've been good, but now, I'm thinking what the hell!"_

I smiled at Avril Lavigne's lyrics. Somehow they fit perfectly into the description of my life, and maybe that was exactly what I needed to do. Think what the hell, go out there and do something crazy for once. Maybe this would be the night I got my first kiss, and maybe, just maybe, it wouldn't be with Damon.

Feeling way too carefree and confident, I jumped down from the chair, and went to the dance floor with Caroline right behind me. I loved dancing. I didn't care at all about my body, about my looks, about anything. I just wanted to dance with my friend, and that was exactly what we did.

It didn't take long, before Caroline disappeared as well, and I felt a pair of very manly hands on my hips. Not caring who the hell was touching me, I turned around and put my arms around the guys neck. As I looked at him, I recognised him instantly. Mason.

I smiled at him, tip toed and shouted a hello in his ear. He smiled at me and said hey back. His arms were still wrapped around me, holding me tightly to his body. I didn't feel anything for him. Not at all. But I really didn't care at that moment.

I loved feeling this carefree. It was probably the alcohol speaking, but I didn't really care about anything else than dancing right now. Not even Damon. I wasn't even sure he was here anymore. It seemed like he had just left at some point during the evening. He was probably home with some girl, having hardcore monkey sex with her. Ew, I was going to sleep in that bed later...

The thought made my dancing a bit more daring, as I got closer to Mason, remembering my promise to myself. Be bold. I was going to be bold. And Mason wasn't too bad. He was good looking and pretty sweet.

God, what would I do with the alcohol?

"I'll take it from here, buddy."  
My arms were removed from Mason's shoulders and neck, as someone grabbed me by my shoulders. Ready to be mad at who ever stopped me from dancing, I turned around and was met with Damon's beautiful blue eyes. They were shooting fire against Mason.

"This guy bothering you, Elena?" Mason said, stepping closer to Damon. Oh God, I really didn't want them to fight right now. I knew that look. Damon was ready for a fight.

"Funny, really, I was about to ask you the same," Damon said, anger beaming from his eyes. This wasn't good. This wasn't good at all!

"No, don't, it's fine, I'm fine," I said quickly, wanting them to stop fighting. I really couldn't handle them going physical.

"The hell you are," his hand wrapped around my upper arm, "come on, we're going home."

"Whoa, whoa! Where do you think you're taking her?" Mason said, sounding angry. For heaven's sake, couldn't they stop freaking fighting?! I had said I was going home with Damon. Couldn't they just let it go?

"Home. Elena's saying goodbye now," Damon said, sounding way too protective.

"And who the hell do you think you are?" Mason said, stepping closer to Damon. God, I really didn't want them to get in a fight. Both of them were strong men. It could easily end the wrong way.

"Her boyfriend!" Damon said coldly, wrapping an arm around my waist possessively. I didn't even frown at his lie. What the hell was with him and his mixed signals? They had been there all of our time in Cali. I needed to talk to him about this, when we got home.

"It's fine, Mason, really. I'll call you, I promise," I said, following Damon, as he started walking away.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he hissed, as he pulled my towards the exit. Sighing I knew there was no other choice than to follow him home. That didn't keep me from being completely furious with him.

"If you weren't able to see it, I was actually having fun! Dancing with a guy! Seizing that day! Wasn't that what our bet was about?" I said, trying to keep somewhere near calm, as we walked down the street, back to the house. I wanted to slap him, to freak out on him and ask him what the fuck he was expecting. But I didn't want to do it on the open street. As soon as we got inside, I was going to give him one hell of a fight on this.

Damon slammed the door, as soon as we reached our room.

"Your virginity really means nothing at all to you, does it?!" Damon yelled, as he paced back and forth in the room. God, I was mad.

"What makes you think that it doesn't?" I asked, my voice raising slowly to the same level as his.

"With the way you're dressing, it's clear that it doesn't mean anything at all to you! I mean, can that dress be any shorter?" he asked, throwing his hands in the air. That made me go off.

"Well, what if I wanted it to be over wit, huh?! You're going to stand here and lecture me. Oh, I forgot, apparently, you're my boyfriend! That gives you the right to decide if what I wear is appropriate, right?" I was screaming at him now.

"So, you're just going to give it up to some random douche bag, that doesn't know a thing about you?! Someone that can't keep you happy, huh?!" he was furious.

I had never seen him this mad before. But it didn't matter at all. I was just as furious as he was. No, actually, I was more furious than he was. First of all, he had pulled me away from the party we were attending, without asking me if I was ready to leave. And now he had the guts to tell me what to do with my life? What the fuck was going on in his head?

"It's my freaking life. I get to decide what to do with it! I don't need your protection," I yelled, feeling my heart speed up. He had almost punched the guy I was dancing with at the club. It would've turned nasty, if I hadn't gone with him home. And now we were the ones fighting and even though I felt like slapping him, it was impossible for me to not think about how sexy he was. And how much I wanted him. Gosh, even when he was being a douche bag, I still wanted him. I needed to get my priorities in place.

"You've been saving it, for fucking 20 years! And now you just want to go out and give it to some guy?! What the hell? Yes, you do need my fucking protection! This isn't the Elena I know! My Elena would never do something like this! She would never just give it up!" he said, looking as though I had told him I wanted to do drugs or start smoking. Why the hell was he seeing this as such a big deal?

"What the fuck is it to you, Damon?! It's my fucking life! Mine, Damon! What if I'm tired of waiting, huh? What if I just want to get it over with?!" I yelled. I didn't even see the truth that were hidden in that statement. I was tired of waiting for him to see me, I was tired of waiting for him. But I knew in my heart, I would never give up. And I would never go out and let some other guy take it. I didn't know anything else, than being in love with Damon. I had been ever since we were children, and I wasn't going to let him go this easily. Not after everything I had been fighting to make him see, while we had been in Cali. We were getting closer. The chances of getting together were actually growing for once, and I didn't want to give up.

"What it is to me?! What the fuck, Lena? It's everything to me! You're my best friend and I won't just let you get used by some guy. I don't care if you're tired of waiting! Then let someone else do it. Someone who won't use you," he yelled, stepping closer to me. What the hell was he thinking about? Letting someone else do it? This was starting to get ridiculous.

"You don't want me to get used, like you use all of your countless girls. Screw you, Damon," I said, feeling sadness mixing with my anger. Not a good combination. In that moment, I remembered almost every single girl Damon had brought home, the noises I had to listen to, while I had been crying and cutting my self in the other room.

And now he just told me to keep waiting, or to choose someone to just do it? What the fuck?

"Those girls are nothing like you! How can you even say that?! You've seen those girls, you know they're sluts, you know that they don't care about anything else than sex! You deserve better. So much better. You deserve someone who can take care of you, someone who knows you, knows what you need! Damn it, Elena, you can't just go out and screw some guy. You can't!" he said, while letting his finger run through his already messy hair. God, he was hot.

"I can do whatever the fuck I want to do, Damon! I'm freaking 20 years old, and I'm tired of waiting for the right guy to come around," I screamed, fully knowing that I wouldn't stop waiting. Not now, not ever.

"Then let me take it," his voice were suddenly calm and collected, even though the fury was still burning in his eyes. I felt the need to slap him, but at the same time I wanted to give in to him. So bad. But I couldn't.

"What the fucking hell, Damon? You don't want some random boy to take it, but you want to do it yourself? You're just as bad as they are! I can't even count how many girls you've had home with you during the last year!" I yelled, feeling furious and hurt. He wanted to use me, just like all his other girls. How little did he think of me?

"I'm not like them, Lena," he said, stepping closer to me. I frowned and stepped back. I did not like where this was going. He wasn't yelling like before. All his anger seemed to have disappeared completely. He was suddenly all calm and collected, and it made me worry. What had changed?

"And why the hell shouldn't you be like them?" I asked, suddenly very aware of just how hot he looked, wearing that button up shirt. The two upper buttons were open, revealing a bit of his perfect sculptured chest.

"Because I'm in love with you, God damn it!"

"Wait, you're wh..." Before I could finish my sentence, his hands were resting on my cheeks and his lips were against mine. All the anger disappeared from my body within a second. Damon's lips felt amazing on mine. His hands were holding my head firmly in place, without too much force and his lips were hot and passionate against mine. I enjoyed every small second of it. This was what I had been wanting to do for so long.

My arms wrapped around his neck, as his tongue licked my lower lip, begging for entrance. I gasped at the feeling and let his tongue slide into my mouth, only to tangle itself with mine. His hands went from my face to my back, while he pushed me backwards. I followed his lead, until I hit the wall. His hands were on either side of my face, as he cocked his head, to get a better angel.

I tangled my fingers into his hair, and tried pulling him closer, feeling a need running through all of my body. A need for _him. _I had never felt anything like this before. Everything was new, strange and completely wonderful.

My whole body was on fire, as his hands went to my waist, tugging at the hem of my tanktop. I let him pull it up a bit, as his hand rested on my belly, underneath my shirt. The skin contact almost set me on fire. God, it felt amazing. I would let him do anything, just for this continue. I was having my first kiss. With _Damon! _I was really kissing him. This wasn't some kind of dream. This was actually happening.

He bucked his hips against mine, showing me just what he wanted to do with me. That made me return to reality with a loud _bang. _I couldn't just do it now! I was having my first kiss, I wasn't ready to have my first time! Not even with him. This was moving forward way too fast for my liking.

I moved my hands from his neck, and put them on his chest, pushing him a bit away. Then I remembered every word he said, before we kissed. Had I really heard those words, I had been hoping to hear for the past fifteen years?

"And I know you love me," he said, his voice only a husky whisper. My eyes widened, as I tried to pull even further away, but I was pressed against the wall, his body pressed against mine, hiding absolutely nothing. God, his arousal was distracting.

"Wait... What?" I said, feeling the tears in my eyes. Suddenly our fight had become very confusing, and I had no idea what was going on. The emotions were overwhelming me, and I couldn't stop a tear from sliding down my cheek. He gently wiped it away, his eyes never leaving mine.

"I know you love me," he repeated, "I can't believe I didn't saw it before. And I wish I could have told you that I feel just the same."

My eyes widened even more, as the words left his mouth. This couldn't be true. He was pulling some kind of sick joke on me. He had to be! There was no way he could know about my feelings. He had been completely oblivious to them, for almost fifteen years. And all of sudden he knew? Something had to be off.

And don't even get me started on the whole thing about him also feeling something for me. He hadn't ever seen me as more than a friend. Why should it change, all of sudden?

"Elena, please say something," he said, suddenly looking very nervous. I tried to calm my self down, and locked my eyes on his. I needed to clear this up.

"What... This can't... Damon, this... How did you even find out?" I whispered, too caught up in his eyes, and by the fact that his body was this close to me. Our lips were inches apart. I wanted to pace around the room, pulling my hair, but I couldn't do that. Damon was kind of in the way. And I needed to see his eyes.

"Well... It's kind of a long story of misunderstandings, but Matt spilled the beans after I threatened him," he said, shrugging. Once again, my eyes went wide.

"You threatened him!? Why? What had he done?" I asked, only getting even more confused. What the hell was going on behind my back?

"As I said, that's kind of a long story of misunderstandings. And right now, I really want to kiss you again," he said, suddenly sounding out of breath, as he looked down at my lips. Oh, how I wanted to feel those lips against mine again. But I had to find out what was going on.

"You said you felt the same..." I started, trying to find a way to ask him, without hurting him, and without making a complete fool of my self. He nodded and frowned at me.

"You don't believe me?" he asked, as the hurt rose in his eyes. I bit my lower lip and looked away from him.

"It's just... Damon, I've been in love with you for fifteen years, and during all those years, I've always been your best friend, your little sister. Never dating potential. And now you want me to believe that you feel the same about me?" I said, trying to keep the tears at bay. I didn't want to cry anymore. I really didn't want to.

He sighed and let one hand caress my cheek.

"To be honest, I don't know for how long I've loved you. As more as a friend. I've known since we left from home. Something just made me realise that I've wanted you for far longer than I've ever known," he said, looking into my eyes, as his hands went to my side, "we have a lot to talk about, and I think both of us is starting to get a bit uncomfortable here. Come on, let's put on pj's and go to bed."

I nodded as we started finding our pj's. I didn't care about his presence, and started taking off my clothes. He'd seen me in my underwear before, this wouldn't be much different. I quickly put on his shirt and sweats and then pulled off my bra. I felt his eyes locked on my body the entire time. I couldn't keep my thoughts from spinning completely in my head. Had he really said all of those tings? It hadn't been a product of my imagination and dreams?

"Come on, Lena. Get in. Promise, I won't do anything inappropriate," he said, already laying under the covers. I got into the bed, not sure if I should keep my distance or lay down close to him. We'd been sharing a bed for a long time, and I was used to him holding me. But somehow, this was different. We were going to talk about feelings. Feelings we had towards each other. Maybe it wasn't smart to get too close.

"I'm not going to bite, you know. Unless you like that, of course."  
I could hear him chuckle a bit and saw him turn his head, looking at me. It was like something in his eyes had changed. They were much more light and I could practically see the love radiating from him.

"I know, it's just... Everything changed now, and I don't know how to act around you... I mean, I just had my first kiss, with my best friend... And now we're in bed and I don't know what to do."  
My cheeks turned crimson red, as I babbled on. Why couldn't I just shut up? I wasn't making this any easier. He would probably regret within long.

"Ssh, Elena," he chuckled and smiled at me, "come here. Don't worry about it. Just let me love you."

He pulled me into his arms, hugging my tightly to his body and kissing my forehead. I put my arms around him, and enjoyed being this close to him. It was an amazing feeling, and I loved it.

"I'm sorry I just kind of... Kissed you. I've wanted to do that for a very long time..." he said, turning a bit to the side. We were now both laying on our sides, looking into each others eyes.

"Well, I guess you can do it as often as you want now..." I said, smiling shyly at him. It wasn't like me to be this forward. Not at all. But I wanted to be good for Damon. I wanted to be someone he wanted to stay with.

His eyes were looking questioning at me, and I nodded slightly, letting him press his soft lips to mine again. Just like the first time, I felt amazing. I wanted more. What was stopping me from going all the way with Damon? We were in a bed, we were home alone...

He broke me off my thoughts, as he pulled away, with a slightly dizzy look.

"Just let this happen, Lena," he said, gently caressing my back.

"But what exactly is happening, Damon?" I asked, feeling nervous about all of this. I had no idea how to handle all of this.

"Two people, loving each other, enjoying their time in the Hotel California."

Again, I found my self blushing. He was sweet. God, he was amazing. And I was finally here. I was in his arms, where I belonged.

"Just let go, Lena. For the rest of this trip, just let go of everything. The past, your doubts, anything that might hold you back. This is about you and me now. So, just relax and let me love you. Let me show you just how perfect we can be," he whispered, still looking directly in my eyes. I had no idea what to say. So I did the only thing I could think about. I kissed him. My lips moved with his, as my hand went to cup his face and my body got closer to his. The arm that were currently resting on my middle, pulled me even closer, fingers grasping my back. A small moan escaped my lips, allowing his tongue to move inside.

He bucked his hips against mine, and again I was brought back to reality. I couldn't just do this now. I wasn't ready. Not yet.

"Damon..." I said, pulling away from him, looking down. I was embarrassed. I wouldn't be enough for him. I would tell him that I wasn't ready to go all the way with him, and he would dump me, because I wasn't enough. I felt a small tear form in the corner of my eye.

"Hey, what's going on, Lena? Don't cry. Hey, talk to me," he said, grabbing my chin gently and bringing my gaze back to his.

"I'm... I'm not ready to take that step yet, Damon. I'm sorry but... I'm just not ready to loose it yet. I know it's not what you want, but I just can't... I'm sorry." The tears started flowing from my eyes as I shut them close. I didn't want to look at him. I didn't want to see the disappointment in his eyes. I didn't want to look into his eyes, as he told me he didn't want me.

"Hey, Lena! Look at me. Stop, look at me." I opened my eyes and looked at him. He looked completely vulnerable.

"I don't care if you don't want to have sex with me right now. We don't need to go there. I've been waiting for this to happen for a long time, and I am so happy, just laying here, holding you and maybe even kissing you. I won't ever press you. You don't need to go all the way with me, if you don't want to. I promise you, if you want to take that step, I'm going to be here, and I'm going to make it perfect. But you don't need to feel like you need to do it. This is great."

Once again, he left me completely speechless. How the hell do you respond to something like that?

"I love you, Damon," I whispered, and pressed my lips against his again.

"I love you too, Lena. Don't you ever doubt that."

* * *

**PLEEEASE REVIEW! I am _so _nervous about this! A huge thanks to my wonderful, amazing, beautiful beta _Foreverfirstloves. _If you haven't read her stuff, you seriously need to go do that! I'm serious! **

**Okay, please review! REALLY! And I will see you next time! I am working on chapter 17, and it should be up soon. Now that they're finally moving past the friends stage, is there anything you'd like to see them do? I really need ideas for stuff they can do, so please bring your ideas forth! :D **

**I'll shut up now! See you next time!**


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